Evening Shadows Part 1
by Zalia
Summary: Alice has a vision of a veteran of the southern wars being escorted to the Cullen family at Maria's behest. Jasper does not realize how far he has come and how much he can help the newcomer. Jackson Whitlock has served Maria for the agreed 70 years and wonders how this strange coven could help. It is not wise to doubt Alice. All canon, set after Breaking Dawn
1. Visions

**Bella**

Alice stared at the wall, her face falling into the blank expression which indicated she was experiencing a vision. Within seconds Jasper appeared beside her and took her hand. A wave of concern washed over me before Jasper reigned in his gift.

Alice blinked and looked up at her husband, shaking off the vision.

"What is it love?" Jasper whispered.

She bit her lip, "I'm not sure yet. I saw Maria."

I watched them together as I had on many nights before. Now that Renesmee had reached maturity I had been forced to accept the reality that her world centred on Jacob rather than her vampire family.

Quil and Embry had switched back to Sam's pack at Jacob's request when we moved to Alaska five years earlier but Leah and Seth had refused to leave. I knew that Embry was considering switching back to Jake's pack as he had still not imprinted so there was little holding him at La Push.

I had hoped to remain in Forks longer but once alarm over Carlisle's unchanging appearance appeared at the hospital we had been forced to plan a move. Charlie and Sue had gotten married before we had left and had visited every year at our request. Though Emmett kept joking that they should settle down in Florida to get old and grey I knew Charlie had many years of life ahead of him. I was waiting for him and Sue to take up our offer of unlimited funding for the world trip they had planned. Alice had assured me that they would accept eventually but we were not allowed to encourage them in person.

Edward had pointed out that my inability to accept gifts without feeling awkward clearly came from my father.

So Sue lived quietly with Charlie while her children halved their time between Alaska and Forks. Renesmee had reached maturity at the age of seven as predicted, which left me longing for the days when her small hand reached for mine. I was still amazed that I had been able to be a mother, but I could not stop the ache that wished her childhood had been longer.

Jake had been reluctant to propose as Renesmee was technically only seven years old, although she looked eighteen and acted much older. Renesmee had solved the problem by proposing to him a few months later, much to his surprise. They planned a very long engagement, much to Alice's annoyance. Edward had revealed that in the four years since then, Alice had been stocking up on supplies and Jasper had threatened to move it all to the garage if she didn't rent a storage locker.

Neither Leah nor Seth had imprinted, which worried Jake and Renesmee. Their regular visits to Forks ensured that the Pack remained active at La Push, though no new wolves had phased since we had faced the Volturi. Jake had encouraged Leah and Seth to remain in the hope that eventually they would stop phasing and begin to age normally again. Leah had quickly told him where to shove that idea.

The four of them had left to return to Forks minutes earlier, allowing Alice to see her visions for the first time in months.

Now that I had gotten to know Jasper I could recognise the signs of tension in him. The mere mention of the woman who had sired him prompted a flare of anxiety which he struggled to conceal.

Alice kissed him on the cheek, "I'm sure I'll see more as decisions are made," she reassured him lightly.

From outside I heard Emmett's booming laughter. Alice giggled and suggested I go check on my husband. Even Jasper ducked his head to hide his smile.

Even after ten years my ability to walk without tripping over something made me smile. I doubted I could match Alice for grace or Rosalie for poise but the absence of clumsiness remained a gift I was thankful for. No doubt every Emergency Room I had ever attended as a human was grateful too.

Carlisle and Esme had retreated to their private cabin a few miles away, claiming that they needed some alone time. Emmett had permanently scarred everyone within earshot by announcing what they were really going there for. Rosalie had smacked him across the back of the head but no-one bothered to contradict him as we all knew that he was correct.

I opened the door cautiously, wondering why I would hear laughter and vicious snarling at the same time. The sight which greeted me caused an eruption of laughter to bubble through me.

Edward lay pinned to the ground by Emmett and Rosalie. He snarled and thrashed but the couple managed to hold him down.

"Dare I ask?" I called.

Rosalie glanced up, her hair in slight disarray. If she had been human her face would have been flushed with amusement.

"We're trying to save our reputation!" Emmett explained cheerfully.

"Get off me you ox!" Edward shouted. The dust thrown up by their tussling scattered everywhere, though a significant portion settled in my husband's hair.

"Don't insult my Rose!" Emmett bellowed back. The laughter in his voice betrayed the threatening sound.

Rosalie giggled and used one hand to mess up Edward's hair.

I walked forward to survey the scene. Edward's eyes pleaded with me to help him but I could not bring myself to interfere with Emmett's fun.

"How will crushing my husband save your reputation?" I asked with a barely concealed smile.

"Carlisle said you and Edward are worse than Rose and I!" Emmett huffed. Edward rolled his eyes.

"Well, shouldn't you be upstairs proving him wrong?" I asked logically.

Emmett and Rosalie shared a sneaky glance.

"You're way cuter than Eddie anyway," Rose purred. Emmett growled softly, one of the odd vocalisations I recognised as an invitation.

"I resent having to see that!" Edward called irritably as he sat up. A slight gust of air was the only indication that Rose and Emmett had moved.

"Worse than them?" I asked Edward. If he could have I'm sure he would have been blushing.

"They got the repair bill from our second honeymoon," he explained sheepishly, "They're talking about building a new house because we damaged the foundations."

From inside the house I could hear Jasper and Alice laughing.

After a not-so-brief interlude Edward and I lay in bed trying to ignore the obnoxious moaning and wall-thumping emanating from the room down the hall.

"They're probably not even doing anything," I commented after a particularly loud crash, "Just throwing stuff around to annoy the rest of us."

Edward pinched the bridge of his nose between two fingers, "Trust me, there's nothing platonic happening in their room right now."

I giggled and offered to extend my shield around him again. He accepted gratefully and I watched his features smooth out into a smile.

Just as our thought began to turn to further carnal pleasures Alice's shrill shriek echoed through the house resounding with notes of panic.

"Edward! Of all the times to get Bella to block my thoughts!"

Within seconds Edward had pulled on a pair of jeans and disappeared out the door. I took a few extra seconds to cover my upper body as well as my lower.

I arrived in the living room moments before Emmett and Rosalie. Emmett covered his eyes with one hand and moaned that Edward was scarring his fragile psyche by walking around shirtless.

"I heard your thoughts five minutes ago," Edward grumbled, "Nothing could scar _that_."

"You should walk around shirtless Em," Rosalie suggested with a purr. Emmett tried to comply but Rosalie changed her mind and announced she didn't want to deal with Edward's jealousy.

Jasper's abrupt growl silenced everyone in the room. Alice clung to her scarred lover with wide eyes. The quiet but gentle Vampire I had spent a decade getting to know was gone; a fearsome warrior stood in his place. A sliver of fear slid down my spine.

"Peter and Charlotte are coming," Alice said without hesitation, "They have a stranger with them."

I dropped my shield from Edward so he could see his sister's vision for himself. Confusion creased his brow.

"We are going to meet them," Alice continued, "The stranger will either join our family or we will have to kill him. There are no other options."

"When?" Emmett demanded.

"Tomorrow night."

**Edward**

I had never thought I would be grateful to Jacob for taking Renesmee away. Yet the knowledge of the arrival of two vampires I did not trust along with a third we had never met accomplished exactly that.

We all sat tensely on the front lawn. Alice had insisted that she be closest to the letterbox; Jasper would not be persuaded to remain more than a metre away from her.

"This sucks," Rosalie stated with her usual tact, "Are we the Home for Lost Vampires now?"

"Rose," Emmett said pleadingly.

"This could happen every week, we'll end up eradicating whole species of animals if we take in any more," she continued.

"Rosalie," Carlisle said sternly, "You will be civil or I won't give you a yacht for Christmas; I'll give it to Jacob instead."

Rosalie growled her annoyance but fell silent. I heard her thinking of Jacob falling off the yacht and drowning at sea.

Dusk arrived too quickly. Carlisle and Esme sat together talking quietly while Emmett and Rosalie held each other tightly.

I felt the urge to enter the house to sit at the piano but I wouldn't have been able to concentrate on playing anyway. Everyone's thoughts moved so fast I resorted to asking Bella to shield me.

I clung to her gratefully, a pair of statues waiting for disaster. Unlike in the past when Bella had been so fragile I knew she was as durable as me. I was oddly calm as I had already faced the terrifying possibility of losing her; what else could really compare to that?

Alice jumped to her feet, quickly followed by Jasper. She did not hesitate to scamper gracefully to the end of the driveway. Bella dropped her shield immediately, knowing I needed to hear the thoughts of the newcomer.

Jasper reminded me of a sniper as he followed slowly, his every thought focused on an impending attack. He stood to the side, partially obscured by a tree.

I heard the thoughts of the vampire just beyond the tree line.

_Maybe they're just insane,_ He wondered, _Maria trusted these two; maybe their job is to kill soldiers she is sick of?_

"Hi Jackson!" Alice greeted excitedly, "I'm Alice and this is my mate. Please come closer!"

The stuttered and incoherent thoughts of the new vampire actually made me smile.

"She just ignores us," Peter huffed, pretending to be hurt. He and his mate Charlotte approached wearing similar smiles.

"Oh, you're here," Alice teased, "I was hoping for someone more interesting. Charlotte, haven't you gotten sick of this dope yet?"

Charlotte moved forward to hug Alice. Peter flipped her off with a laugh, earning a growl from Jasper. As soon as Jasper moved forward vicious snarling from the forest erupted through the area. He pushed Alice behind his back and crouched to meet an attack. His own growling matched that of the newcomer in aggression.

"Hey!" Alice cried, "Shut up! Both of you!"

I laughed out loud at the sudden silence. Jasper was reeling from the glimpse of a vampire as battle-scarred as his own reflection. Even worse, the underlying resemblance between the two of them was eerie.

Alice jumped onto Jasper's back and kissed the side of his neck. He stood up and stepped backward though his thoughts were not at all happy about it.

Peter and Charlotte had remained still, having expected the noisy reception. Charlotte waved the newcomer forward. He took two steps but remained in the forest. I could hear the shock and fear in his mind as his ears and eyes tracked how many Vampires were in the vicinity.

"This is Jackson," Peter introduced.

"I swear no-one in my coven will harm you," Carlisle said smoothly, "I am Carlisle and this is my mate Esme."

Jackson glanced in their direction. The light threw the harsh scars on his face and hands into sharp relief. I felt a growl building in my chest but the non-violent thoughts in his head made me push it away.

Alice dropped back onto the grass and a wave of calm flooded through the area courtesy of Jasper. He had deliberately positioned himself between Alice and Jackson.

After a brief introduction all eyes returned to the newest vampire.

"Maria asked us to bring one of her soldiers here so he can adjust to civilian life," Peter said softly, "This is Jackson Whitlock."

"Whitlock," Rosalie gasped.

Jackson regarded Jasper intently. I listened to him fight down the automatic urge to challenge my brother with the image of Charlotte explaining that Jasper could help him. Slowly he stepped forward so everyone could see him clearly.

"Edward is a mind-reader," Jasper explained quietly. I heard Jackson suck in a horrified breath and the memories began to increase in intensity.

"Bella," I pleaded. A moment later her shield enveloped me.

"Bella is a Shield," Alice added, "She is blocking Edward at the moment."

"Sorry," Jackson managed.

"Forgiven," I managed, "I know you didn't mean to hurt me."

"Edward is remarkably discreet," Jasper offered, "No matter what memories he sees he will not discuss them without your permission."

Jackson nodded, clearly unwilling to come closer. I ran my hand down Bella's hand, which was our silent signal for her to drop her shield. Thankfully Jackson remained focused on my family rather than his gruesome memories.

Jasper held Alice tightly and would not meet anyone's gaze, "Some things are best forgotten."

"Jasper do you remember your little brother Benjamin?" Charlotte asked.

Jasper nodded slowly and whispered, "Benny."

"He was Jackson's great-grandfather."

All eyes turned toward the newcomer, whose thoughts became frantic. Instead of dropping into a defensive crouch he chose to flee. In a flash he was gone.

"He's terrified," Jasper said urgently, "He is expecting us to kill him or at least chase him away."

"I agree," I said, "And from his thoughts he is already considering fleeing."

"We can help!" Alice insisted, "He is family already, we just have to convince him to stay."

"I can't believe how much he resembles you Jasper," Emmett commented with a grin, "He looks years older but everything else is you."

"And the scars of course," Rosalie added, "That one down his cheek is pretty shocking."

Jasper stared at the forest while deep in thought. Bella noticed the curiosity on my face; clearly I would be explaining what I was sensing later.

He was thinking of Maria. Twisted, ugly scenes of torture, humiliation and rape dominated his thoughts. If he had been human he would have been crying from the deep emotional scars he hid from everyone but me. Even Alice did not know the dirtier details of his time in the south.

"I think he will need your help Jasper," I said to my brother. He regarded me with tortured eyes.

"Can't we all help?" Emmett asked.

Jasper shook his head, "I doubt he will accept anyone's help."

"You did," Alice pointed out.

He clung to her like a drowning man holding a life raft. His eyes flicked to me and he silently asked me not to comment on how much Alice had never been told.

"Great, another stray," Rosalie sighed.


	2. Arrival

**Edward**

Jackson slowly crept back to the tree line, his nervous glances at the house easy to read. He wondered how many Vampires could possibly be concealed in there. The thoughts of my family whispered in the back of my mind, but only one of them voiced exactly what she was thinking.  
"You look worse than Jasper," Rosalie announced with her usual tact.

"Rose," Carlisle warned.

She shrugged, "I'm just saying what everyone else is thinking."

She was as correct as she was blunt. There was one particularly vicious scar Jackson bore on his left cheek which ran from his hairline down to his chin which kept drawing my gaze.

Charlotte rolled her eyes, "But you didn't have to say it." She walked over to Jackson, keeping her arms down and her hands clearly visible. He tensed and took a step away from her. I was reminded of a feral cat shrinking away from human contact.

"Charlotte," Peter warned. He was remembering similar scenes with Jasper when he had ended up with nasty bites and once an arm severed at the elbow.

Charlotte was not deterred, "Jackson, no-one in the Cullen family will hurt you unless you threaten them directly. Seriously, the first year Jasper was here he bit Emmett, threw Edward into a tree so hard it snapped and nearly threw Carlisle through the attic window. Can you imagine doing anything worse than that?"

Jackson glanced around with wide eyes, clearly unsure of what he was being told. His gaze fell upon Carlisle, who was surrounded by a fog of concern. The lack of aggression from the leader of the coven calmed the anxious Vampire.

I was interested in the visual nature of Jackson's Empathy. Jasper struggled to define what he was feeling but through Jackson I could see clouds of colours wafting through the air.

"You can sense that I'm telling the truth," Charlotte continued, "And you know that Edward is the mind-reader. Ask him what the consequences were."

Jackson slowly glanced up to meet my eyes. There was no aggression in his thoughts, only fear. I could see my own concerned image through his eyes. I tried to loosen my tense shoulders to appear less threatening and lesson the halo of fear and concern he could see. Bella stood next to me with one hand on the small of my back.

_What a bunch of weirdos_, Jackson thought with confusion; _they're all worried about me. Except the Major, he has enough sense to be suspicious. How have they lasted this long?_

"Emmett was told off for trying to goad Jasper into teaching him how to fight," I said, recalling how angry Rosalie had been at her mate, "Jasper apologized for destroying the tree and my favourite shirt but warned me not to touch Alice if she wasn't expecting the contact. We were punished by a weekend of shopping."

"I had fun," Alice commented brightly.

Jackson's gaze flicked to Alice and a small spark of hope flared in his thoughts. The longing for peace was so vibrant in his mind that I felt an echo of the ache in my own chest. The bubbly optimism which surrounded her soothed him. He focused on a warm orange glow which stretched between Alice and Jasper. The strength of the connection between them fascinated him.

"And I did not blame Jasper for my near-flight experience," Carlisle said in his deep, reassuring tone, "I pushed him to far before he was ready to trust and I congratulated him on his self-restraint."

Jackson's eyes darted between the numerous vampires as the anxiety fermented in the air. The presence of so many Vampires, and talented ones at that made Carlisle's leadership utterly terrifying. Jackson was sure that the blonde Vampire had a secret, awesome skill which kept the rest of us in line. The thought of being under the power of a ruthless coven leader made him long for death instead.

Alice watched a vision of Jackson fleeing again.

"Emmett and Rose, could you return to the house please?" Alice suggested, "Feel free to resume your previous activities."

I cringed at the images which flashed through their minds before they disappeared inside. Jackson stared at the retreating couple in astonishment before his attention flicked back to Alice. Thoughts of retreating were kept at bay by his curiosity.

"Would you please stop encouraging them?" I demanded of Alice.

"Settle down Edward; Esme has already planned a new little cottage nearby for you and Bella to demolish. Did you know how much titanium costs?" Alice laughed, "Maybe you can add a dog house out the back for when Jake visits?"

Jackson was calming down, clearly interested in the bickering between us. The presence of so many Vampires was still deeply disturbing to him but the attack he expected hadn't materialised. I watched with curiosity as Jackson analysed the thread of orange which linked me to Bella. I had never thought of the mating bond as a physical tie, but that was what he could see.

"You are welcome here Jackson," Carlisle said gently, "Whether you would like to stay briefly or forever our family will not harm you."

Carlisle loomed large in the thoughts of the newcomer. He braced himself for pain or some other type of manipulation. Instead he watched a pink shroud of affection grow between Carlisle and Esme. Streaks of deep purple lust began to grow alongside the pink haze.

"Esme and I have cottages to plan," Carlisle added with a smile at his mate, "I am sure each couple would appreciate one."

"I've already designed one for Jasper and I," Alice offered, "The closet is going to be epic. We'll need heaps of beds of course; and not just the replace the ones you are going to break Esme. Do you think we can order in bulk?"

Jasper snorted, clearly feeling the lust I was trying to ignore in the minds of my parents.

"Come along Carlisle," Esme said with a smile, "The children clearly want us out of the way."

"Perhaps we should go play Bingo or something?"

"Or something," Esme cooed. Alice grinned and motioned for them to get moving.

Jackson watched them leave with growing confusion. He had been warned that we were odd but he was beginning to wonder if we were actually insane.

_The telepath is reading everything I think, _Jackson reminded himself as he considered the remaining Vampires warily. After Jasper he considered me to be the biggest threat.

Charlotte remained close to him, as did Peter but I could read that he did not really trust them. They had obeyed orders to deliver him to the Cullen Coven and refrained from hurting him but they remained unpredictable.

"Jasper, I'm sure Peter and Charlotte would appreciate some time to catch up with you," Alice said pointedly. Trust and happiness shone from her in a wave of silver which Jackson absorbed gratefully. He wondered if he would every find someone who could accept him as completely as Alice accepted Jasper.

"Alice," Jasper's eyes flicked to Jackson, who sensed the grey wave of anxiety.

"No arguments my love," Alice whispered, "Trust me."

Slowly Jasper stepped away from his mate, his eyes on the scarred face which unsettled him more than he would ever admit.

_Do not hesitate Edward_, Jasper thought, _I don't care if he is my identical friggin twin, Alice cannot be harmed._

I nodded slightly as he turned to Peter. The three of them withdrew slowly toward the forest. Jackson watched them for a few long moments, and the awestruck title which dominated his thoughts was simply; _the Major_.

Bella stepped forward with a smile, sending panic surging through me. Jackson stepped away and lowered his gaze.

"You are an Empath as strong as Jasper?" I asked, fighting down the apprehension.

Jackson met my eyes, "Not quite as strong," he admitted, and silently added, _though Maria insisted I was the better fighter_.

Alice moved forward gracefully, remembering the moment in the diner when she had approached Jasper. Her emotions were as pure and welcoming as they had been back then. Jackson stared at her in amazement.

"Edward is cautious as Bella is his mate," Alice explained, "They have been together just over a decade."

Jackson considered the situation, recognizing my fear as understandable considering his scars and sudden appearance. He sent out a wave of calm but it was not as strong as what Jasper was capable of.

_I understand that the women here are all taken_; Jackson thought at me, _I would not-_

"I know," I said softly.

Bella smiled at me and stuck out her tongue, "I am not the fragile little human you married Edward."

Images of courting a human and the resulting bloodbath flashed through Jackson's mind. He regarded me with respect for the first time, though the fear was still quite prominent.

Alice flipped through various snippets of the future, and settled on one which showed the four of us sitting in the forest.

"Bella gave birth to a half-Vampire child while she was still human," Alice said softly, much to my annoyance, "Renesmee just left with her mate yesterday."

Questions whirled through Jackson's mind about the wedding night which I had no plan to answer.

"If you would prefer to relay your story through me I can oblige," I offered.

**Bella**

Jackson refused to re-enter the house which Edward thanked him for.

"Emmett and Rose are going to be busy for hours yet," Alice giggled. She gently looped her arm around Jackson's elbow, ignoring the way he stiffened from the contact.

"I am your aunt many times removed," she explained with a grin, "I would not want my nephew to be exposed to the activities taking place within the house right now."

"Try saving me next time," Edward muttered. I caught his hand and we followed where Alice led, keeping ourselves to the side so Jackson could keep us both in sight. The stories of Jasper's first decade within the family were easy for me to recall, though they had been few in number and not detailed.

"How did you end up with Maria?" Alice asked softly.

We reached a small meadow where Edward and I curled up together against a tree. Edward held me against his chest tightly and rested his chin on the top of my head. I did not have to be an Empath or a Mind-reader to know he was still very wary of Jackson.

Alice sat down cross-legged and patted the space next to her. Jackson glanced between us, clearly confused.

"Why do you sit down?" he asked.

"To practise appearing human," Alice explained, "It is a good habit to develop."

Jackson sat down slowly, making sure he was not touching her.

Edward nodded, "Maria watched the Whitlock bloodline looking for another such as Jasper," he explained to the rest of us, "When Jackson returned from the war in 1946 she turned him."

"I wonder why you didn't see anything Alice?" I said thoughtfully.

Alice shrugged.

"She planned this," Edward explained, "She asked for seventy years of service in exchange for his freedom. Jasper was only useful for about seven decades so she chose that number for his service."

"She said I can return after a year," Jackson added quietly, "But I won't."

"You don't have an accent," I said curiously, "I thought you'd sound like Jasper when he forgets to cover it."

Jackson glanced at Edward.

"Maria did not want to be reminded of Jasper, so she made him hide it," my mate explained, "What a bitch."

Jackson smiled and Alice giggled. I glared at my husband disapprovingly.

"Well she is," Edward insisted, looking away guiltily.

"Charlotte explained that we don't kill humans," Alice stated.

Jackson nodded and I could feel the curiosity emanating from him.

"Jasper suffers badly when he feeds from a human, though it has been a few years since he slipped," Edward said, drawing the newcomers' attention back to him, "Can I see how you are affected?"

Jackson looked away and Edward flinched, "You actually pass out? How did Maria react to that?"

Jackson turned his head slightly to show a large scar on the side of his neck. It was much larger than a regular bite though it held a similar shape.

"Always the same spot?" Edward clarified, "What a-"

Alice cleared her throat, "Edward, you're being affected by Jackson's gift but Bella will cuff you over the back of the head if you keep swearing."

Jackson watched the interplay between the three of us with clear interest.


	3. Major

**Edward**

Jasper's thoughts warned me of his approach, which I relayed to Jackson. The potential hostilities between the two experiences fighters had loomed large in everyone's thoughts since Jackson had arrived. Even Jasper wanted to avoid a physical confrontation out of his concern for Alice. He was sure he would survive but he did not want to put his mate through such an ordeal.

"Peter and Charlotte are heading off, but will return in a week or two to check on you," I said to the nervous Vampire, "Jasper is heading this way and does not want to alarm you."

Jackson nodded and his gaze kept shifting between the three of us. I could hear him desperately trying to remain calm even though he could sense the wariness of Jasper as he approached.

"You two have no idea how much you have in common," I said to Jackson, who stared into the forest. He waited for Jasper to appear while he reassessed which direction would be the best for an escape route.

"Jasper," Alice called, "Come sit down."

Jasper emerged slowly, his eyes flicking between his mate and the newcomer. He did not like that they were so close to each other.

"Jackson is no threat to Alice," I said simply.

He was not worried about a physical threat but a potential crush on his mate. I pointedly ignored his insecurities while Alice rolled her eyes.

_The Major._

Jackson was staring at Jasper but the title continued to cycle through his thoughts. Clearly Jasper was still famous in Maria's army and stories of his battles had elevated him to an almost mythological figure.

"Jasper, you're famous," I said with a smile, trying to lighten the mood.

Two sets of warrior's eyes flicked toward me, one set gold and the other red.

"You're the bogey-man and General Paton combined into one, according to Maria," I explained.

"What a bunch of crap," Jasper snorted. Alice giggled and held out her hand for Jasper to take and settle next to her.

_Too many Vampires_, Jackson thought anxiously, _I could escape from the three but not the Major._

"If you want to leave, you are free to go at any time," I said softly, "I understand how overwhelming this must be."

_I doubt it._

"Jackson, did Peter and Charlotte explain why our eyes are gold?" Bella asked.

Jackson regarded her thoughtfully, "Yes. I hadn't realized animal blood could sustain us."

"It's disgusting," Jasper sighed, "But the emotional backlash from human blood; well you would understand that."

Jackson nodded, his eyes continually flicking back to Jasper. Clearly neither one would take the risky step of letting their guard down around the other. By reading the thoughts of each of the former soldiers I suspected I knew what could diffuse the situation.

"P-"

"Edward, you're a genius," Alice laughed.

Jackson regarded her with confusion.

"I see visions of the future," Alice explained, "And I just saw Edward making a suggestion that will really help."

"Visions?" Jackson repeated. _Too powerful, what have I gotten myself into?_

"Bella and I have a Girls Day Out to plan," Alice explained, jumping to her feet, "You boys will be taking Jackson to Hagemeister Island tomorrow. Edward, don't let Emmett challenge Jackson to a fight or he will lose his arm."

Alice and Bella left in a gust of wind.

Jackson stared after them with his mouth open.

Jasper sighed and a wave of calm settled over the three of us, "This was your idea Edward?"

"I only thought that removing Alice and Bella would lower the tension level between you two," I replied.

_Who runs this Coven?_ Jackson wondered, _Why does she make all the decisions?_

"We are not a Coven but a family," I explained to Jackson, "We all have a say in the decisions, Carlisle does not force any of us to obey his will unless it is a matter of safety. No-one would attempt to harm you at all if you disagreed with them."

"The only condition is the diet," Jasper added, "As long as you are trying to stick to it you are welcome here."

Jackson imagined killing a human by accident and being ripped apart.

"No. We understand accidents, especially in the first few decades of this lifestyle," I clarified, "As long as you are committed to trying to resist we would ask no more."

"I have killed eight humans since I joined this family in the early 1950s," Jasper admitted, "My control is much better than it was but it is a long road."

"Emmett has killed five people since the 1930s," I added, "And Esme three. Alice adopted the lifestyle when she was still a nomad but slipped four times."

"No-one was punished," Jasper pointed out, "Not even Edward when he took off for a few years to hunt criminals."

_Hunting the evil humans_, Jackson thought, _Noble but still painful; their last thoughts._

"Not noble," I argued quietly, "I became the monster I was trying to hunt. I came back and was welcomed immediately."

_Edward, can I speak to Jackson alone please? You can stay within range but I doubt he will make much progress while he is outnumbered._

I glanced at Jasper with a frown, "You are the biggest threat here Jasper, not me."

Jackson frowned to both of us.

_Edward._

"Fine, but I will remain close. If I let you two start fighting Alice will key the Aston Martin."

**Jackson**

The telepath left at a human pace, levelling a frown at the Major. Jasper turned back to regard me with calculating eyes. His emotions did not indicate aggression but as an Empath he may have perfected a way to avoid telegraphing his intent to another.

"Do you want to stop killing humans?" he asked softly.

Did I? I hated the emotional backlash but was that reason enough to follow this strange lifestyle?

"I don't know," I admitted.

The tension between us eased. Jasper nodded thoughtfully.

"I joined this family because of Alice," Jasper said quietly, "I had no regard for human life; I changed my diet just to please her and remain."

He leaned back against the trunk of a tree, which was odd as he had no real need for the support.

"I struggled badly for over fifty years because I was doing it for her rather than for myself," Jasper explained, "But once I met Bella and got to know her I realized how important even one human can be. I had never really valued human life before that, as stupid as it sounds."

I was surprised by how open he was being about his experiences. In his position I would have driven any nomad away from my mate no matter who escorted them. Not that I could grasp how connected a Vampire was to his or her mate really.

"I could not have survived much longer in the life I had before I met Alice," Jasper concluded, "You may be able to live off human blood for a couple of decades but then the depression will set in and you'll begin looking for a way to end it."

The prospect had already loomed its ugly head in my darkest moments but hearing it put into words so coldly was confronting.

"I want to stay here;" I said softly, "The emotions I have been picking up are soothing, most of the time."

"Peaceful," Jasper clarified, "Carlisle is a cloud of serenity and we're all swept up in it. Esme has the maternal warmth that could pacify a feral cat."

"Has she tried that?"

Jasper snorted, "No. We considered it but Alice had a vision of Emmett chasing the poor creature across three states trying to attach sticky tape to its tail."

I almost smiled at that image.

"We are a family and that is going to confuse the hell out of you for a few years," Jasper added, "I don't know if I can help or if my presence will unnerve you even more."

I wasn't sure either. Each time I looked at him I was reminded of the scars I bore and the fear my own image inspired. The unease which flowed from him each time his eyes focused on my face indicated that he was having a similar reaction.

"Thank-you Major," I said, resisting the odd urge to salute, "I appreciate your honesty."

"Do you remember your rank from your human years?"

"Captain."

Jasper smiled, "Then I still outrank you. I give you my word Captain that you are not in danger here. I will try to explain any concerns before they become an issue but the biggest threat will be the women. No male is completely rational when it comes to protecting his mate so -"

"Avoid pissing off the women?"

"They can give as good as they get really, but if you lash out at anyone physically make sure they are male, preferably me."

The Major was not what I had expected at all.

"Yes Sir."

"Any my name is Jasper, not Sir."

I doubted I would be comfortable with calling him by his first name in the near future; hearing stories of his battle prowess for decades had instilled a healthy respect and fear.

"Right," I managed.

"There is another very good reason for you to commit to our diet," Jasper said thoughtfully as he plucked a strand of grass from the ground. I watched his actions, still marvelling at how much effort they had put in to their human facade.

"We know of one single female who follows out diet in another coven," Jasper continued, "I'm sure Alice will be arranging a meeting once you have settled in. If she is not your mate then either you will have to convince a traditional Vampire to convert or -" he trailed off.

"Or?"

"Imagine finding your mate as a fragile, breakable human," Jasper sighed, "Any time you kill a human you could be killing her or a male destined to sire her."

The idea of a human mate was ridiculous and yet that was exactly what had happened to the telepath; Edward.

"That is a scary concept," I said more to myself than to him.

"Edward has more control than anyone except Carlisle and he was so close to attacking Bella that Alice's visions kept switching," Jasper revealed ominously, "I hope for your sake that Tanya is the one for you."

The prospect of a mate was as frightening as it was exhilarating. The complex web of bonds between the family members would take time to decipher, but the strong links between mated pairs were easy to detect. I tried to imagine what it would be like to know someone so well that I could be comfortable telling them everything; and failed.

"When Alice first saw your arrival she could see two very clear options for your future," Jasper said softly, "Either you will join us, or you will return in a few decades begging us to destroy you."

I froze even while his emotions remained wary. The statement sounded like a threat but the only enemy was my own mind.

"Were you welcomed here?" I asked hesitantly, "Even with your past written on your skin just as mine is?"

He was thoughtful for a few long moments before he answered, "Alice was welcomed immediately and I was able to sail in her wake," he admitted, "Alone I would never have approached another coven, but I would do anything for her."

I wondered if I was capable of the level of devotion he described. I suspected each of the Vampires I had met since leaving Maria's army were equally as dedicated to their mate and my curiosity would not remain silent.

"How did the leader react?"

Jasper studied me with his dark gold eyes, "The first lesson you will need to accept is that this is a family, not a coven. Edward was not lying about that. Carlisle does not consider himself our leader and I found that very confusing at first. I kept waiting for him to display some amazing ability; after all why would Vampires as talented and strong as Edward and Emmett follow him if not by force?"

His reasoning mirrored my own far too well.

"It took me months to accept that they follow him because they admire his compassion and respect his opinion. I hope you are able to reach this conclusion quicker than I did. No matter how many times Alice assured me that we were safe here I remained on edge waiting for a violent outburst which never came."

His emotions told me that he was being honest but it was such a ludicrous idea that I could not believe him.

"Do you want me to stay?" I asked. I knew what response I expected but once again the Major surprised me.

"I don't know," he admitted, "The threat you could pose to my family worries me greatly but I could not run you off because of something you might do. I will never be as worthy as Carlisle is but I can extend the kindness he has taught me to you. I want Alice to be happy, and she wants you to stay so if there is a vote within the family, I will be voting to welcome you."

Jasper smiled at the confusion which surrounded me before walking back toward the house at a human pace. The fact that he had turned his back on me without fear said more about him than anything he had said.


	4. Forest Dweller

**Jackson**

I remained in the forest, my mind analysing everything I had heard. The Cullen's were very strange but I was not ready to drop my guard completely; they were still Vampires after all.

I had build up an image of the Major which did not fit with the Vampire I had met. Even referring to him as Jasper in my mind seemed ill-fitting. The vicious soldier had been replaced by a golden-eyed veteran seeking to improve himself. I could have related to the soldier, or even fought to death with him. Could I walk a similar path and find something better?

If Alice's visions were to be believed I did not have a choice but to remain and try their animal diet. The female was so genuine in her emotions that doubting her did not feel right. The way she had looked at me and the trust in her aura had baffled me. I wanted to be worthy of her trust. Once day when violence and killing was further behind me I wanted to have a mate look at me with trust.

I wondered if I had passively agreed to accompany Peter and Charlotte here because the concept of death did not scare me as much as it should have.

As the sun set I began to explore the immediate area, easily memorising the landmarks of the terrain. I remained well away from roads just in case the smell of a passing human reached me.

It was a lovely area which I probably would have found relaxing except for all the scents. The Vampire scents were bad enough but there were three distinct trails which were absolutely disgusting. I was curious about any creature that could leave such an appalling odour without being dead and partially decomposed. I wondered what other supernatural creatures the Cullen's associated with, and how long they could stand the stench without retching. Considering one trail made me want to stop breathing forever I did not want to meet the creatures who had left them.

I climbed the trees, jumping from one to the other to alleviate my boredom. I found one strong branch which allowed me a clear view of the large while house the Cullen's lived in and sat down to think. It was an elegant house, with large windows. I could glimpse movement every now and then which only added to the absurd way they lived. The Cullen's relied too much on the talents of Alice, Edward and Jasper to keep them safe.

Even as the thoughts crossed my mind I wondered if I was still watching them through the lens of war. This was not disputed territory between newborn armies so the risk was close to non-existent.

I did not want to return to Maria, and I did not want to die. Logically remaining here was the only choice but it was so different from anything I had known before.

I was sure I could learn a lot from Jasper but the thought of hurting Alice made me frown. I was sure if I stayed I would end up injuring some of them unintentionally. I remembered Jasper's advice regarding lashing out at the women in the family. Some long-forgotten shred of my human life hovered in the back of my mind. A man had taught me to never raise a hand to a woman; I wondered if the man was my father.

I remained on that tree branch for hours, alternating between staring at the house and the starry sky thoughtfully. I loved looking at the stars, much to Maria's annoyance. Every night I saw stars I had not noticed before and new patterns in their shifting movements. Hours could pass without effort when the sky was clear. I bore more than one bite mark earned while ignoring Maria and gazing upward.

Not long before dawn I spotted movement at the front door of the Cullen house. I watched the progress of the two Vampires who emerged as they attempted to follow my trail. They were not very good at it. Rather than using their noses and ears they were relying too much on their eyes. How had Jasper spent decades with these Vampires without teaching them the basics of tracking?

Finally the large male identified as Emmett and the blonde female called Rosalie approached the area where I remained concealed.

"This guy is annoying," Emmett muttered, "I am not a bloody scent hound."

I dropped down behind them while he spoke. Neither noticed me, which I found amusing.

"He has to be here somewhere," Rosalie sighed.

"Indeed I am," I said quietly. They both spun around with a growl. Their emotions were not aggressive, only surprised so I remained still rather than dropping into a crouch. I should have been fearful of their presence but their sad attempt at tracking assured me that if I ran I would be able to lose them.

The sheer size of the male was impressive but my gaze was drawn to the female.

"Your beauty is mesmerising," I said to Rosalie. The pride which clouded around her was streaked with a few lines of embarrassment.

"Why thank-you," Emmett said, pretending to fix his hair, "Though I'm not interested in men."

Rosalie laughed and shoved him. I could feel a slight smile creeping onto my face. Jokes and immature behaviour were rare in my previous life. I envied how easily humour emerged among the Cullen's.

"I understand that you two are a couple," I added to minimise the jealousy beginning to creep into Emmett's aura, "But beauty should always be appreciated. Sorry to disappoint you Emmett."

Emmett grinned, "Apparently the girls are going to go put face masks on or something," he said, "We're going hunting."

I waited for him to reveal something I didn't already know. I glanced at Rosalie, who was watching her mate expectantly.

Emmett sighed, "Jackson, I promise not to try to sneak up on your or goad you into wrestling with me."

Rosalie smiled, "Thank-you sweetie," she kissed him on the cheek.

Emmett rolled his eyes, "When Jasper first showed up I did both," he admitted while the annoyance floated around his mate, "I earned a couple of bites and Alice saw a vision of me doing it again."

"He would have ended up with a severed arm and you would run away," Rosalie added, "Edward and Jasper would track you down but it wouldn't be pretty."

Emmett was grinning again; it seemed to be his default expression, "Jasper took a couple of years to settle in before he would wrestle with me. I've never beaten him but Alice says you can teach me how to give him a run for his money."

"Wrestling? What for?" I had been trained to fight to kill, which I doubted was the point.

"For fun!" Emmett laughed, "Damn you sound like Jasper when he first showed up. Bears are good for a warm up but only Vampires provide a real challenge."

He was so genuine and happy that my initial fear of his size was fading. I envied his optimism.

Rosalie looped her arm around Emmett's elbow, "My husband is going to behave himself," she said pointedly, "But just in case he decides to do something stupid I wanted to warn you that his intentions are juvenile rather than aggressive."

"Ah Rose, I'm not juvenile, I'm young at heart."

She rolled her eyes, "Back to the house with you," she instructed, "Go on."

Emmett hesitated, clearly not comfortable leaving his mate alone with me. I did not blame him in the least.

To my surprise he kissed Rosalie softly and walked away at a human pace.

I kept my eyes on the female, recognising the more dangerous foe.

"Jasper struggled to adjust to civilian life," Rosalie said quietly once Emmett was out of ear shot, "He and I recognised each other as survivors."

She bore the energy of someone who had seen torment and endured to gain strength others rarely understood. Clearly she was as formidable as she was beautiful.

"I may not have any special abilities but I will protect my family against anyone who threatens us," she continued coldly, "And I want to know what your intentions are."

We remained in an unmovable tableau in the forest, each sizing up the other with suspicion. She was not afraid of me at all, which I found impressive.

"I don't want to fight anymore," I said honestly.

Rosalie nodded slightly, "Are you still following Maria's orders?"

I knew I could have taken offence at her question but in her position I would have been much more aggressive.

"No. Her last order was for me to accompany Peter and Charlotte here."

"Do you plan to stay?" Her hands moved to her hips. She was a truly stunning sight. If anyone could keep me from killing people, it was Rosalie.

"I wasn't sure before, but yes; now I want to stay."

"What convinced you?"

I was not sure how to explain the decision, or even if I understood it.

"I've never met a Vampire like Emmett," I said thoughtfully, "I still can't believe he left you alone with me."

Rosalie glanced to the side, "He is trusting."

"Jasper and Edward could stop me from hurting anyone," I added, "And if necessary I know you would have the strength to kill me."

Her eyes narrowed, "Why does that matter to you?"

Why did it matter? I thought of Alice, Bella and the concern which had flowed from everyone else.

"I don't want to hurt anyone else, I have done enough damage in my lifetime," I added, "I don't want to be a monster anymore."

Rosalie smiled but it was only slight and it didn't reach her eyes, "Being a Vampire doesn't make you a monster. Being human doesn't mean they are not monsters. Only our actions determine if we are monsters or something better."

The hard edge to Rosalie was clearly apparent in the emotions which flared as she spoke. She was not only strong but honest. Her words matched her emotions and she made no attempt to manipulate me.

"I envy Emmett," I admitted, "If I can find a mate half as amazing as you I might even believe there is a God."

Pride flared in her aura again, streaked with curiosity rather than embarrassment.

"Don't try that southern charm on me," she laughed, "You could end up pretending to be my brother or something and that would be creepy."

"I don't understand."

"When we attend high school, Jasper often poses as my twin brother. As you were clearly older when you were turned; but not enough to be our father, you could be our older brother."

"High school?" I tried to imagine voluntarily sitting in a room full of tasty teenagers. Even if I could resist the temptation of their blood, their hormones would drive me insane.

"Sometimes I think I am dead and repeatedly attending high school is evidence that I am trapped in Hell," Rosalie mused, "Then Emmett smiles at me and I'm in Heaven."

The haze of deep pink which hung around her every time she spoke of her mate left me aching with jealousy. I wanted someone to feel that way about me but I knew I didn't deserve it.

Rosalie stepped toward me, far too close for comfort. My back slammed against the tree behind me as I attempted to escape but she remained resolute. I cringed as her hand came to rest on my shoulder. Panic surged within me, only held back by the determination in her eyes.

"Look at me Jackson."

I did, staring into the dark gold eyes which pinned me in place.

"I can feel the fear you are projecting," she continued in her hypnotic voice, "You need to defeat it. You will need to find your mate and avoid drinking human blood if you want to survive. We can only help you if you let us."

She stepped backward and removed her hand. The sad expression on her beautiful face could not hide the hope I spotted swirling around her.

"The boys will here soon," she said quietly, "Please remember that Carlisle wants to help. He would never raise a hand to any of us so push the fear away."


	5. Facing the Fear

**Jackson**

I was back in my favourite tree before Rosalie re-entered the house. I listened to the countless birds chirping in the forest around me while my mind returned to the mystery of the Cullen family.

I wanted to trust them so badly it scared me. The burning pain in my throat was a welcome distraction from the odd emotions this _family_ had stirred up.

Family. For the first time in my long existence I wondered about the definition of a family was; clearly it was not confined to blood relations or humans.

I wondered if there was something wrong mentally with the Cullen's but their emotions were so peaceful when I wasn't growling at them. Surely if they were crazy their emotions would be fluctuating wildly?

I watched a rabbit hop into sight a few metres away from the base of my tree. It sat up and looked around cautiously, its nose twitching. The idea of pouncing on it and drinking the small amount of blood in its body did not interest me at all. I did not remember much from my human life but I did remember taking my nieces to see the movie Bambi. I could not remember the name of the rabbit but I could remember how much the girls had loved the movie.

The rabbit bolted to safety seconds before Emmett stopped under my tree. He grinned up at me while the anticipation he was feeling washed over me.

"Come on Jackson!" he called excitedly, "It's time to go hunting!"

I watched the grin on his face falter when I failed to respond. He was so relaxed and _open_ that I envied him; he had known love, acceptance and happiness his whole life. He had never been tortured for failing to win a battle. He had never dreaded being ordered to sexually service his sire against his will.

The telepath, Edward, followed at a human pace. He frowned up at me, no doubt disturbed by the images in my mind. If he revealed what I had been thinking about I would not stop myself from tearing his head off.

"Emmett, would you settle down? He's already questioning our sanity as it is without you acting like a giant child."

"You know Edward, I thought you'd loosen up once you got laid," Emmett said seriously, though the emotions I could see were full of mischief; "But you still act like you have a stick up your arse."

Anger, annoyance, exasperation and frustration swirled around Edward before fading. He was certainly moody for a Vampire but I could only imagine how stressful his gift must be. I was just thankful for the discretion Jasper had assured me of.

Edward glanced up at me, "You try living here for decades without a mate and see how well you control your emotions," he responded to my unspoken observation, "Emmett has been practising annoying me since the thirties."

Emmett made a rude noise at his brother, "Still as boring as ever. Why did Carlisle even invite you to this hunt?"

"To keep you from trying to goad Jackson into a wrestling match," Edward retorted with a pointed glare.

"I promised Rose I wouldn't," the large Vampire muttered.

They really were entertaining when their focus was on each other rather than on me.

Carlisle and Jasper exited the house at a human speed. Even though I wanted to believe everything Jasper had said I could not look at Carlisle without seeing a huge threat. With one word he could -

"Jackson, are you ready to come down yet?" Edward was asking a silly question just to derail my train of thought. I allowed it to distract me for the most part.

Rosalie's instruction to overcome the fear and allow myself to trust slipped back into my mind. I did not know if I was strong enough but I had to try.

"Rosalie shoved you into a tree?" Edward asked curiously.

I hissed at him instinctively. He raised his middle finger at me, a reaction I did not expect at all. I froze in place and stared at him.

Emmett's booming laughter echoed across the forest, "Should I hiss at you more Eddie?" he teased, "I want to see you do that while Bella is around."

Carlisle and Jasper reached the rest of us. Jasper was clearly amused while the older Vampire was curious.

"Emmett, I asked you to invite Jackson to come hunting. What have you been doing instead?" Carlisle asked.

Jasper continued past the other three and placed himself at the base of a nearby tree. While Emmett tried to explain Edward's attempt at sign language Jasper pointed at me discretely. His finger traced through the air to the tree behind him before resuming his nonchalant pose.

I leaped to the tree and dropped to the ground just behind the Major before the other three realized I had moved. Jasper remained motionless even while I was less than a metre behind his exposed back. For a moment while we stood there tall and confident I was reminded of my human days in the military. A sliver of camaraderie passed between us.

"The Captain and I are ready whenever you are," Jasper informed them calmly.

Emmett grinned at me again. The mischief in his expression did make me slightly nervous.

"Emmett, knock it off," Edward instructed tersely, "If you want to wrestle it has to be with me or Jasper."

"Or me," Carlisle added with a smile. The thought startled me; if Carlisle was defeated in a fight would he lose his position as head of the family?

"Carlisle is too easy to beat," Emmett complained, "And you two don't fight fair."

"I don't use my power," Jasper argued.

"It's not fair that you have all that experience and won't teach me," he complained.

"Jackson has the same training," Edward sighed.

"But he might teach me all those cool moves!" Emmett said hopefully.

I remembered Maria telling me she was disappointed that my powers were not as strong as the Major's without physical contact. The dangerous change in her expression as she offered to let me live as I was a better fighter on the condition that I keep her satisfied in the bedroom still made me nauseous.

Pity began to leak from Edward's aura. I backed away from Jasper's back carefully, hating the invasion from the telepath. Every instinct in my mind ordered me to flee from the humiliation.

"Emmett, you will not even hint at asking Jackson to teach you anything for at least a month," Carlisle said flatly, "I have already spoken to Rosalie about this."

Emmett began to look worried, but there was no fear.

"If you don't leave Jackson alone about this she will refuse to have sex with you for two months," Carlisle continued.

Emmett was clearly appalled by the idea. Edward and Jasper could not contain their laughter.

I was fascinated by the complete lack of fear in the exchange. Carlisle did not even raise his voice let alone a hand. Even though he had lost wrestling matches to his underlings he remained secure in his leadership position. Though it flew in the face of all of my previous experiences I was glad there were no power-struggles creating stress between them.

Edward met me gaze knowingly. I could not stop the thoughts about invasion of privacy which I did not appreciate.

"Without Bella I cannot stop myself from hearing your thoughts," Edward sighed, "I can try to tune you out but there are no guarantees."

Emmett sighed dreamily, "I just think of Rose riding my-"

"Emmett!" Carlisle, Edward and Jasper growled together. I jumped back instinctively from the aggressive sound, my senses on full alert. I was hissing and tensing for an attack when I realized that Jasper had turned to face me but none of the others had moved.

Jasper straightened up from the attack crouch he had fallen into.

"I apologize Captain," the Major said sincerely, "We do not realize how threatening we can be sometimes."

I stood up slowly, keeping my eyes on his hands which were held palm-out. Emmett was grinning again, which made it hard to believe I was about to be attacked.

"You're fast," Emmett commented, "Jasper; do you think he could take you in a fight?"

Carlisle sighed, "Emmett."

Emmett held up his hands, "I'm not challenging anyone to a wrestling match; this is all hypothetical."

"Come on Em," Edward invited, "Race you to the cliffs."

They darted to the right, halving any threat from my point of view. I was sure the telepath was deliberately trying to make me feel more comfortable.

Jasper was directing waves of reassurance at me. I realized that Maria was correct; he was stronger than me without physical contact. I wondered if she was also right when she had claimed I was stronger through touch.

"Sorry," I said softly.

Carlisle smiled, "There is nothing to apologize for Jackson. Emmett can be rather over-enthusiastic sometimes. He does not realize how threatening some of his gestures are."

"I'll leave you two to talk," Jasper offered. I wished he would stay but my pride kept me silent. The rush of anxiety coming from me would have alerted the weakest Empath of my distress.

Jasper glanced at me but did not offer any artificial courage. The slight smile he gave me as he left confused me.

"Thank-you for this Jackson," Carlisle said as soon as we were alone. He was so sincere I simply did not know what to say or do.

"I understand a lone male approaching a coven is in a very vulnerable position, and even though we are really a family my position still carries an implied threat," he continued. He began to follow Jasper, and his posture invited me to follow while keeping him in sight. I followed hesitantly, not understanding what he expected me to do. Any other coven leader would have demanded I submit and added a new bite to the side of my neck or face to display his dominance.

"When Jasper and Alice turned up I tried to be as welcoming as possible," Carlisle explained. He glanced over at me with a smile before resuming his pace.

"I did not understand that sustained eye contact was considered a challenge," he continued in his deep voice, "I failed to understand how Jasper expected me to act and how torturous it was to try to understand my actions in the context of his experiences."

This odd coven leader was strangely fascinating. Without an inkling of violence in word or deed he commanded absolute respect and loyalty without any fear. He made Maria seem short-sighted and petty.

"As a doctor I want to try to heal you of the emotional scars you still carry," Carlisle said, "Yet my experience with Jasper has taught me that I have to earn your trust before I can help you. I am thankful that I have a second chance to avoid the mistakes I made with Jasper."

I quickened my pace so I was nearly alongside him. I could still see his back but he was able to see me in his peripheral vision. It was the first step toward trust, and I was able to take it much sooner than I had imagined.

The surge of appreciation did not surprise me, but the ample dose of pride did.

"Sir-"

"Please call me Carlisle. I know it is hard to let go of old habits but I promise there is no disrespect in calling me by my first name; I actually prefer it."

I straightened my shoulders, taking strength from the honesty.

"Carlisle," I said softly.

He waited patiently while we continued at a human pace deeper into the forest.

"It was not my choice to come here, but I do believe I am in the right place," I admitted, "Seeing Jasper so content here has given me hope."

"I do consider Jasper to be one of the strongest men I have ever encountered," Carlisle said with obvious pride, "I am glad I was able to assist him but he has chosen and followed a difficult path. Refraining from human blood is always hard, especially for those who have known no other way to live."

We continued in silence but there was no apprehension growing within me. Individually, this Vampire was not a threat to me. As the leader of this family he held the key to a future I craved.

Carlisle stopped when the scent of the other males wafted on the air. Clearly he wanted some privacy before our conversation ended. I waited curiously, surprised that the anxiety had drifted away.

"Each day at three am I will seek you out," Carlisle said with a reassuring smile, "I would like to spend an hour simply talking to you and giving you the opportunity to ask questions. Is this acceptable?"

After a moment of hesitation I accepted that he really was offering me a choice.

"Yes."

"Hopefully one day soon you will venture into the house but in the meantime I am happy to explore the forest. I may have to cancel on occasion if I am rostered on at the hospital, but I do believe that spending time with me will help you to accept that this is a safe environment."

The lump of gratitude which swelled up in my chest startled me. The apprehension I had felt earlier seemed more than foolish. I had never been good with words so I directed the gratitude toward him and uttered a phrase I had not dreamed I would willingly say to a coven-leader.

"Thank-you."


	6. Hunting

**Jackson**

The pride and affection Carlisle was directing toward me was as soothing as it was confusing. He led the way south and informed me that an overabundance of an introduced species on the uninhabited Hagemeister Island gave us a great opportunity to hunt.

His pace quickened to faster than the fittest human athlete but fell short of top speed for a Vampire. I remained just out of arms reach and slightly behind him. I did not sense any anxiety from him at having an unfamiliar Vampire within lunging distance.

The sound of a Vampire crashing through the undergrowth drew out attention. To forsake stealth for speed there must have been a very serious motivation. I wondered what could possibly be the problem.

Carlisle stopped a moment before I did, which left my back partially exposed to him. I twisted around to face him before shuffling to the side to place myself behind his right shoulder again. The blonde Vampire ignored my behaviour, something he had probably seen when Jasper had first arrived.

Emmett's scent reached us a full second before he raced into view. The tension flowed around him like a cape. Jasper and Edward were not far behind him.

"What's wrong?" Carlisle asked calmly. There was concern in his aura but no fear. I wondered if the Vampire ever let the serenity drop.

As Emmett replied the scent of a human reached me. After nearly a week without feeding the burn in my throat was quite painful. Rational thought was wiped from my mind as I raced after my prey.

Another Vampire slammed into me from the side. I flipped him off me with a savage growl. Another crash echoed through the forest and I was knocked off course again. A tree cracked beneath me but the large Vampire lacked the fighting skills I possessed. I had his arm twisted and ready to be torn from his torso when two more Vampires wrestled me away from him.

The smell remained in my nostrils. I extracted myself from the multiple sets of hands trying to restrain me and tried to run again.

A deep, commanding voice rang out. The blonde Vampire who had spoken bore as many scars as I did and he was blocking the direct path to the human. I hesitated for a fraction of a second before launching myself at him.

He twisted and kicked as fast as I did. I countered every attack as my frustration mounted. He caught my leg in a vice-like grip and slammed me into the ground. I used my other leg to return the favour.

The familiarity of sparring with a worthy opponent prompted a spark of enjoyment I was not expecting. The urge to hunt the human faded enough for my mind to overpower my thirst.

Jasper did not give any sign that he understood I had regained my senses but his emotions lessened in intensity. The kinship of shared experiences allowed an unexpected bond to grow between us.

A smile played on my lips as we circled each other again. Amusement coloured the edges of his aura.

We clashed again with renewed energy but no aggression. It was a game of skill and cunning which narrowly avoided injury or dismemberment.

"Stay back." Jasper called to the others, "I've got this."

Edward said something else about my state of mind which eased the tension from the rest of them.

I flipped myself up into the air and tapped the top of Jasper's head on the way. He caught my wrist while I was above him and twisted my arm behind my back.

I kicked him in the chest with both feet and bent my arms far enough to loosen his grip so I was again free.

Jasper spun to the side, landing a heavy kick to my shoulder in mid-air. He landed in a crouch wearing a feral grin. I feinted to the left before attacking from the right. I kicked the back of his knees and had his head in my hands when I stopped.

I heard clapping, which ended the spell Jasper and I had fallen under. We backed away from each other and straightened up.

"That was so cool!" Emmett boomed, "I don't care who teaches me but I have to learn those moves! I can't believe someone can actually take on Jasper and win!"

I focused on Carlisle. Was he angry or worse; disappointed?

He was calm but concerned. I would never understand him.

"We should continue south," Edward advised, "If the wind changes direction again we will encounter the same problem."

"I am sorry for losing control."

Carlisle shook his head, "There is nothing to apologize for. Your behaviour is completely understandable. Resisting human blood must begin with a substitute. I am also impressed that both of you came out of that tussle without injuries."

Jasper and I shared a smile. I was rather proud of myself that I had been able to spar with Jasper without having my head ripped off or biting him.

Emmett let the way south at a cracking pace. Carlisle and Edward did not hesitate to follow, turning their backs to Jasper and I easily.

I allowed Jasper to run behind me. I was sure he wouldn't hurt me on purpose and the knowledge was liberating.

Maria had made sure I remained isolated from the rest of her army; supposedly to make it easier to execute the newborns when the time came. After Peter had explained his friendship with Jasper I knew Maria had tried to prevent me bonding with another soldier and considering escape.

Jasper understood me far too well due to our shared experiences. Surely Maria had changed her behaviour over the centuries but her goal had remained the same; control and power. I would never know the worst of what Jasper had experienced and would never share my version of events but knowing we had suffered at the hands of the same woman connected us more than the genetics we had in common.

We reached the bay within minutes. Emmett was ten metres out and swimming smoothly. Edward did not look impressed at the prospect of having to get wet. I wondered if he was worried about messing up his clothes.

Jasper smiled at me, "Race you there!"

It was easy to allow his excitement to wash away my worries. I felt safer in the bay as all of our movements were impeded by the water.

None of us could catch Emmett, who stood dripping wet on the beach as my feet found traction in the shallows. I half-expected him to shake the water off of his body like a giant dog.

Jasper's snigger drew everyone's attention. Though his hair, like mine, was plastered onto his head by the water Edward looked even more ridiculous. His usually styled hair hung down over his eyes.

"You look like one of the Beetles!" Emmett laughed. Edward growled and chased him into the forest, smoothing his hair back from his face as he ran.

"If a Vampire could go grey, I would have a full head of silver hair by now," Carlisle sighed. In the distance we could hear growling and loud mocking.

I was nervous by the display but I was sure Edward and Emmett would not intentionally hurt each other. I had seen too many newborns sever limbs and inflict agonising bites accidently to be sure there would not be any injuries in the near future.

Jasper recognised my concern and sent a wave of reassurance toward me.

"They do this all the time," Jasper explained, "Edward has enough sense to make sure there are no bites these days."

"But initially?"

"Each bares a bite mark or two," Carlisle conceded, "From when Emmett was a short-tempered newborn."

"And from me," Jasper added, "I still struggle with the bloodlust."

"Well of course you do," I commented while I analysed what I could sense with my nose.

Carlisle watched me and he reeked of curiosity, "Why?"

Sometimes the Cullen's seemed so intelligent and other times they were completely ignorant.

"We're Empaths," I explained, "We can feel our own thirst and the thirst of every Vampire within range."

Shock swirled around both of them.

"Thirst is not an emotion," Jasper said quietly.

"The craving, desperation, need and frustration which are triggered by the thirst are definitely emotions," I pointed out.

They stared at me silently with wide eyes. Carlisle nodded slowly as he accepted the explanation. Jasper was distressed.

"It will never get better," he realized, "I will always be the weak link."

He turned away with slumped shoulders. Carlisle reached out to comfort him. I knew in his position no soothing word or action would help me. Fortunately I was not finished.

"Not now Jasper," I argued, "I will always be weaker than you but we can support each other through our powers."

Jasper turned back to face me again, hope etched on his features, "How?"

"We can calm each other," I said simply, "If necessary we can redirect the emotions or knock each other out."

Jasper blinked, "I've never been able to drive a Vampire into unconsciousness."

Maria had been correct.

"I can, but only through physical contact. Just by being in the same vicinity I can lesson your workload in the house," I continued, "Managing the tensions between Edward and Rosalie, for example, tax you more than you would admit. Eventually we can share the effort. I will be able to recognise that and tell you when you need a break, and vice versa."

Jasper was still doubtful but Carlisle was beaming at me. I absorbed his approval carefully, and allowed myself to relax in his presence.

"You have given me a lot to think about," Jasper murmured.

Emmett and Edward wandered back toward us. Edward's hair looked less stupid but there were leaves stuck in it.

The telepath heard my thoughts and hastily pulled the vegetation off his head.

"Let's get the hunt underway!" Emmett said with his ever-present grin.

"What exactly are we hunting?" I asked.

"Reindeer," Emmett supplied.

An image of a cartoon Christmas special flashed through my mind. For a stupid moment I imagined the horror of every child on the planet if they knew Santa's reindeer were going to be killed and drained of blood.

Edward began to laugh and Jasper cracked a smile. Carlisle and Emmett were confused.

"Jackson is worried that Santa won't have anyone to pull his sleigh!" Edward gasped, clutching his stomach and struggling to breathe due to the intense laughter. It was interesting as he didn't need to breathe anyway.

Carlisle smiled, "I read somewhere that all of Santa's reindeer are female, so if we only kill the males Christmas should be safe," he sounded like he was reasoning with a small child. It would have been funny if I was not the one he was speaking to.

Emmett was rolling on the ground, still booming with mirth. Edward was calming himself but I had never seen him grin so broadly.

"The reindeer here are big, smelly and can put up an interesting fight," Jasper supplied, still smiling, "They are an introduced species destroying the environment so we are doing the world a favour by getting rid of as many as we can stomach."

The cartoon of my imagination now involved Santa stopped in Alaska while Vampires pounced on his reindeer and sucked them dry.

Edward exploded into laughter again and choked out what I was imagining. Within seconds he and Emmett were both on the ground while Jasper and Carlisle managed to remain on their feet. All of them were laughing.

If the island contained any people they were probably expecting an attack by the inmates of a mental asylum any minute now.

Their laughter was perplexing but not insulting. It was definitely preferable to the bloodlust and anger of an army of newborns.

"Well alright," I said, "But if I spot a reindeer with a shiny red nose I am out of here."

I hadn't thought it was possible but they all laughed harder.


	7. Rodeo

**Jackson**

Emmett wanted to watch me hunting for the first time but Jasper rolled his eyes.

"Seriously Emmett, can you remember how I acted the first time we went hunting?"

I knew I would simply stand still and let the animals run away rather than embark on an unfamiliar hunt surrounded by these virtual strangers. Though the bonds of trust were beginning to grow they were far too fragile to test. I was grateful for Jasper's fast intervention.

"I can," Edward put in, "You nearly lost your head that day Emmett."

The image of Jasper attacking Emmett was a strange one. The trust and brotherly affection between them was strong.

"You will head as far south as you can without getting wet Emmett," Jasper ordered. I wondered if Carlisle would countermand him but he did not even show the slightest sign of irritation.

"Edward, head west," Jasper continued, "Carlisle, go east. I will remain here. Jackson, head south and follow the herd. None of us will move until you have finished hunting."

Edward, Carlisle and Emmett took off at Vampire speed. I waited next to Jasper, trying to imagine him existing next to Maria for seventy years. I could only imagine what she had done to him; and I hoped her precautions to keep me in line were developed after he fought back.

"You fight well," Jasper said quietly. He was curious and proud at the same time.

"So do you," I replied, "Maria always said your gift was stronger without touch but I was the better fighter." I did not want to say her name and the flash of anger which swept over Jasper demonstrated the power she held over both of us.

"She was always clever, for a manipulative, power-hungry bitch," Jasper added. I rather admired his candid words.

"She never said who was better in the bedroom," I continued just enough for him to hear me, "I had hoped she had spared you that duty." None of the others would ever be able to understand that aspect of my life the way Jasper could.

He snorted, "I swear, that's the real reason she wants an Empath around all the bloody time."

We shared a glance of understanding before I headed south. Thoughts of Maria were pushed to the back of my mind. She had honoured her end of the seventy year contract and released me. I wished I could rid myself of her presence so easily but I feared she would hang over my life like a dark cloud.

It was a beautiful island, and the traces of human scents were faded. Clearly this was the perfect place for me to hunt; there was no risk that I would catch a human scent again.

The thud of hooves against noise soil reached me a moment before the awful scent. I had never mixed human blood with sour milk but if I did I imagined the scent would be more appealing than what was filling my nostrils.

Yet under the initial revulsion was the steady thump of a pulsing heart. I decided not to discriminate, so I aimed for the closest one.

Within seconds I had snapped its neck and sank my teeth into its throat. The liquid was too thick and didn't taste at all appetising but I forced myself to swallow it. The burn in my throat lessened slightly as I drained the carcass and the rush of emotions which often knocked me out did not happen.

I dropped the reindeer and pondered the difference. As unappealing as the taste was, I liked knowing that I had made a conscious choice to change my behaviour; avoiding the onslaught of uncontrolled emotions was an added bonus.

Though most of the herd had scattered, I needed another one to further ease the burn in my throat. I followed the scent of the dominant buck deliberately, knowing he would put up the best fight.

I rarely lost control while hunting. The scent of a human after over a week of fasting had been an exception, but even then I had regained my senses rather quickly. Maria had hypothesized that my gift was almost useless until I was in physical contact with my prey. As long as I was hunting an animal I could theoretically remain in command of my actions indefinitely.

The buck held his ground once the rest of the herd had moved past him. I admired his courage in protecting his females even as I plotted my strategy. I did not want to snap his neck and drain his blood as it cooled this time.

I lunged to the left and used a tree to change my direction to I landed neatly on his back. He reacted violently, desperately trying to dislodge me as I sank my teeth into his neck.

He was a magnificent animal, and his struggles kept his blood flowing until he was half drained. He slumped in my arms well before I was finished and I silently thanked him for saving the lives of humans and my own sanity.

Edward watched me in silence. His impassive face did not give away any of his thoughts and his emotions were not helpful.

"There are bears here," he offered, "Just rip it up and scatter it around a bit."

I did as he instructed, wondering what the procedure was in areas not frequented by bears.

"Sometimes we bury the evidence," Edward answered, "I would help you but I learned from Jasper that the moments after a kill are not the best time to try to make friends."

There was no dishonesty in his aura, which was interesting. I wondered why he would want to be my friend.

Edward shook his head, "Why not?"

I glanced around, pondering his words carefully. I remembered the few newborns I had befriended in the very early days. Maria had made sure they were destroyed as soon as they had shown a hint of friendship toward me. There had been a girl in particular with long brown hair and a quick wit. One evening we had snuck away to be alone; for the only time as an immortal I had actually enjoyed a sexual encounter. Maria had killed her and made me burn the pieces. That had been the first time I had considered killing my creator; only fear had held me back.

Edward stepped forward, "Jackson, I swear you are safe here. You can share anything within this family. Jasper still struggles with the memories of his time in the south; I wish he would open up to Carlisle."

Carlisle wanted to meet with me every day. Did he expect me to open up?

"He expects nothing," Edward assured me, "But he is making himself available for whatever you need."

It was not a huge price to ask but I dreaded the idea. Trying to articulate the experiences which haunted me would be flat out impossible.

Alarm swirled around the telepath, "You would prefer me?"

I shrugged, "You're going to see it anyway."

"I will consider it," Edward conceded thoughtfully, "But the time with Carlisle will be beneficial to both of you."

Maria had asked much more of me. Talking would be difficult but I had suffered through much worse.

"Let's go find Emmett," Edward suggested.

For a telepath who had been turned as young as he had, Edward was more mature than I had expected.

He chuckled, "Thank-you. My family has been describing me as uptight for so long I consider mature to be a compliment."

I wasn't sure if I could trust him with all of my memories though.

The five of us gathered in the centre of the island, not too far from where I had killed the buck. I found myself fascinated by the orange ropes which connected each of the Vampires to their mate.

Curiosity was palpable in the air. I should have been disturbed by how much of it was directed at me.

"Jackson, I am curious about your gift," Edward began, "Jasper can sense emotions but he doesn't see them like you do."

"See them?" Jasper repeated.

Edward nodded, "In colours."

Carlisle was intrigued. Even Emmett looked interested.

I wasn't sure how to describe something that was second nature to me. When I had first awakened I had assumed everyone could see emotions swirling through the air like mist.

_Edward, could you explain it better than me?_

Edward nodded, "Anger is red, calm is blue for example," he explained, "Emotions swirl around a person, and dissipate into the air. What I find really interesting are the orange ropes between mates that Jackson can see."

"Why orange?" Jasper wondered.

I shrugged, "Love is a deep pink, anger is red. Somewhere in the middle is passion. Yellow is eternal like the sun. Between the red and yellow is the deep orange."

"The ropes extend as far as the horizon," Edward continued, "I think Jackson could track any one of our mates by following it."

"Amazing," Carlisle breathed.

"Boring," Emmett sighed, "I'm going to take down another buck."

"Try Jackson's method," Edward suggested, "Drink it while it fights like a steer at a rodeo. It looked like fun."

Jasper smiled at that image, "Like a true cow boy."

I rolled my eyes. Jasper and Emmett left to track the herd, making bets about riding bucks.

Edward watched me expectantly and made a hand movement which indicated I should speak to Carlisle. I was not sure what to say.

"You're hopeless," Edward sighed, "Jackson thinks it might be easier to share various memories with me since it's going to happen anyway."

Carlisle frowned, "Edward, I can't imagine that would be a pleasant experience."

He shrugged, "I was never able to help Jasper like I wanted; I wasn't in the right place emotionally. Now I can finally give back to the family, especially after everything we went through with Bella."

I was curious about the story of his courtship with Bella. Just the existence of their daughter was surely enough to write a book about. I wondered if my story would be a fair exchange for his.

"Edward, Bella is part of our family and has been since the moment you met her. You do not owe us anything," Carlisle said.

It was hard not to admire Carlisle. His calm acceptance of everything was based in a foundation of moral courage that I could never hope to achieve.

Edward smiled slightly in my direction, which prompted thoughts about how Carlisle dealt with his moody martyr complex. The smile turned into a frown.

"I will leave the decision with you Edward," Carlisle continued, "If you find the memories too stressful I want you to back off immediately. Jackson, you can monitor Edward's emotions; if he needs space but is too stubborn to admit it I want you to let me know."

"Carlisle - " Edward protested.

"Edward, I will always think of you as a son but you take too much upon yourself. I am sure you can help Jackson and he can ensure you do not suffer unduly," Carlisle said firmly.

I wondered if Carlisle was trying to antagonise the two of us to prevent us from forming an alliance against him; something I had seen Maria do more than once. Had I not been able to sense the honest concern from the blonde Vampire I might have believed it for more than a fraction of a second.

The bellow of an enthusiastic Vampire in the distance ended the conversation.

"I believe we will regret it if we do not observe this latest venture of Emmett's," Carlisle said with a smile, "We can at least make sure he eats any animal he harasses."

"He loves to play with his food," Edward explained to me, "After years of pissing off bears you have offered him a new game."

I could not help but imagine Emmett as a cartoon character in Bambi, chasing after a deer while bullets bounced off of him.

Edward started laughing again. Carlisle grinned at him.

"Jackson, I am so glad you are here; I have not seen Edward laugh this much in years."


	8. Mystery of Mates

**Jackson**

Even after gorging on Santa's reindeer the echo of the burn in my throat still remained. I wondered if it would ever go away but from what Jasper had described it simply became easier to ignore.

Edward read my intention to hunt weekly and slowly stretch out the time between meals to test my resistance. I hoped that by helping Jasper I could focus on him rather than myself. If my plan worked he would benefit for the same reason.

Carlisle had led us to the edge of a town so I could get a faint whiff of a human while I had a full stomach. The venom pooled in my mouth and I jerked to a halt. I wanted to remain standing so I fought a desperate battle against my instincts.

A surge of calm from Jasper helped my body but not my mind. If the reward for wanting to hunt a human was serenity there was no real consequence.

"I have an idea," I said slowly, "Jasper, allow yourself to consider hunting."

Carlisle was unsure but Edward encouraged with my plan. Apparently he agreed that it was worth trying.

Jasper took a deep breath and a low rumble began in his chest. I blasted him with the strongest wave of revulsion I could manage. Compared to his powers it was probably half of what he could manage.

The expression on his face drove Emmett into another laughing fit. I hoped Jasper didn't vomit up the animal blood he had consumed.

"That's effective," Jasper muttered.

I smiled, "Pavlov's dog," I explained, "If we associate human blood with wanting to vomit we might be able to train ourselves to avoid it."

"It is an interesting idea;" Carlisle said thoughtfully, "Sadly none of the rest of us will be able to assist the two of you."

The journey back to the Cullen house was interesting. Emmett and Jasper jumped from tree to tree like a pair of monkeys while Edward and Carlisle remained on the ground just ahead of me. I wondered if they were making sure I didn't head back to the city to find a human to snack on, or if they simply preferred to retain their dignity.

I wanted to take to the trees as well but I knew I was not ready to trust Emmett when I would be vulnerable to attack. More accurately, I was not sure I could control my reaction if he came too close. He was so strong that he reminded me of a newborn every time he moved. I had observed so many movements which were clearly intended to be friendly which I would interpret as an attack in the first instant if he was within arm's reach.

I could probably trust Jasper, as he had already proved he could match me in a fight long enough for me to regain my senses. He knew what actions I would interpret as threatening and he had the power to deter me from hurting anyone else.

It occurred to me that I was primarily concerned with the safety of those around me, when in the past I had remained constantly on guard to preserve my own miserable life. I rather liked the change.

I wondered if Edward was monitoring my thoughts. Considering our proximity and his inability to switch it off it was safe to assume he was. It would explain the kaleidoscope of emotions he was producing. He reminded me of a rainbow, if it could writhe around like a pissed-off snake.

Amusement shifted through the annoyance, frustration, curiosity, exasperation, embarrassment and wariness. I had never met anyone who shifted emotions as fast as Edward did.

The more I considered his gift the worse I felt for accusing him of invading my privacy. I could only imagine the torment of unwanted words and images forcing themselves into my brain every second of every day.

It made perfect sense that his mate was a shield able to protect his mind from such an onslaught. I pictured Bella as I had seen her for the first time; fearful of me but right beside her mate. They were so attuned to each other that I could not imagine how Edward had coped without her.

I recalled Alice mentioning that Bella had been human and even bore Edward a child before she was turned; that was a story I was curious to know about. Having the self-control to court a human was a goal which was distant at best for me. I could not imagine the willpower Edward must have mastered to actually impregnate a human Bella.

Embarrassment flooded over Edward, obscuring all the other emotions. It was so easy to push aside the knowledge of his gift in order to function. I mentally apologized while I tried to banish any thoughts of copulation. I knew I could not do justice to Bella's naked body even in my imagination but it was hard to avoid a brief image.

Edward growled. Carlisle glanced at him in surprise.

"Sorry," I said quickly.

Irritation quickly became the dominant emotion, though I could not tell if it was directed toward me or himself.

I let my gaze shift to Carlisle. My previous musing led me to wonder about his bond with Esme. While we had been passing the time on the island 'bonding' Emmett had made a joke about Edward still retaining decades of sexual tension and Carlisle's nearly three centuries of travelling alone had been mentioned. It was amazing to me that he had even survived so long with his compassion intact. I knew I was not strong enough to walk such a lonely path for so long. The world I had experienced did not allow sensitive souls to flourish when power was so easy to abuse. I pushed away thoughts of Maria to marvel at the luck that had allowed Carlisle and Esme to find each other.

I had not been close to Esme and there had been others around but the gentle aura which she wore like a fog had been easy to read. I was curious about how such a creature coped with craving human blood after her transformation. I tried to imagine Esme hunting but all I could only picture the animals from Bambi. I wondered if deer or rabbits had ever followed Esme home when they were supposed to be petrified of her.

Edward chuckled, which was preferable to the growling. The cartoon films I had seen at the behest of my nieces in the early forties remained one of my most vivid human memories. Considering how much Edward was seeing I was glad my memories of sexual relationships as a human had faded to almost nothing. Thank goodness I had never taken more than a passing interest in pornography.

Edward began laughing aloud. He changed direction and increased his speed to leave Carlisle and I behind.

"I can only imagine what is amusing my eldest son," Carlisle commented, "I assume he was reacting to your thoughts? I was considering developing a catalogue of the plant species in the area, which is hardly comedic material."

"I was trying to imagine Esme hunting, but I just couldn't," I explained, deliberately not elaborating on the rest of the thought process, "I think Edward was amused by the picture of the cast of Bambi following Esme into the house."

Carlisle laughed too. I had never known I was a comedian.

"Esme has always wanted a pet but we could never find one which was not terrified of us."

"She does hunt and kill animals though?"

Carlisle nodded. I would have to see it to believe it.

"She won't kill a mother with babies but she does hunt. She prefers the older animals that have slowed down or injured themselves."

"The perfect predator," I mused, "Ensuring the strength of the remaining animals. Do you have a favourite species to hunt?"

Carlisle shrugged, a very human gesture I rarely saw in a Vampire, "Deer are plentiful so I target them. My family describes different tastes between species but all animal blood tastes the same to me."

I wondered if he was able to resist human blood so easily because his sense of taste was almost non-existent. My mind recalled our first conversation and his observations of Jasper.

"How strongly do I remind you of Jasper?" I asked.

Carlisle smiled, "Physically the resemblance is startling, but I have already begun to notice personality differences. Jasper's primary focus for as long as I have known him has always been Alice; every word he said or action he took was based in concern for her. He was terrified of taking the wrong step and ruining her dream of living with us. He could not have known that there was nothing he could do which would lead to him being asked to leave, as long as he was trying to stick to our diet."

He glanced at me and I could see the curiosity, "You have no such centre of focus. I believe you are able to accept our behaviours easier as you don't have to worry about protecting a mate."

It was true; the worst these Vampires could do would be to dismember me, and it would not be the first time that had happened.

"You were obviously wary at first; we are a large coven by any measure but whereas Jasper was always defensive for the first few months I think you are mainly curious about us."

He was astute for a non-Empath; though I knew I had not been discrete regarding my observations of them.

"You are correct," I agreed, "Though I had never considered a mate before meeting Peter and Charlotte I can see how such a blessing would be a hindrance while I adjust."

As we approached the forest surrounding the Cullen house Carlisle's pace slowed. I remained near him and braced myself for his words. The hesitation in his body language was apparent even without my skill.

"I am sure the next few hours will be rather uncomfortable for you," Carlisle said carefully, "After even a day away from our mates there is a strong need for closeness. I will contact Tanya once you have settled in to arrange a meeting; even if she is not your mate I am sure the company of another single Vampire would be helpful."

The thought that they were all rushing home in order to get naked with their mates highlighted how different I had lived. Considering how strong Jasper's talent was I wondered how far I would have to retreat.

"Jasper mentioned Tanya not long after I arrived but I am not sure who she is," I admitted.

"Tanya belongs to the Denali coven, who live not too far from here. She is over one thousand years old and has not yet found her mate. She had hoped that Edward would come around to her way of thinking until he found Bella; she had been alone for far too long."

I was horrified by the idea of having to wait so long for a mate. I could only imagine how Tanya had coped.

"Her sisters Kate and Irina are just as old and were in the same position ten years ago. Since then Irina was killed by the Volturi and Kate found her mate, so Tanya is the only one still waiting."

"What is she like?"

Carlisle described a gorgeous blonde woman originally from Scandinavia who had converted to the animal blood diet so she didn't have to kill any of the men she slept with. It was a noble decision, which made me seriously doubt I had any chance with her. What would she find interesting about a scarred soldier a fraction of her age with self-control comparable to a newborn?

The sound of a car approaching silenced the conversation. The faint whiff of a Vampire indicated that the ladies of the family were home. The anticipation I could sense from Carlisle was understandable.

I politely excused myself so he could seek out Esme; before I could venture more than a few steps deeper into the forest a shrill voice called my name.

I watched Alice jump out of the car while it was still moving, carrying a large bag. She was so happy I could not stop myself from smiling at her.

"Hello Alice," I greeted politely.

"Jackson, what are you wearing?"

"Clothes?"

Alice shook her head and reeked of exasperation, "Have you not noticed the tears and bloodstains all through that shirt? And those pants are so shredded I can see your knees!"

As I was not vulnerable to the cold I was not sure why I was supposed to care.

"And shoes!" She continued, "I can't believe the boys let you run around the countryside in bare feet!"

Before I could reply she shoved the bag at me. I peered inside it suspiciously.

"Get changed out in the woods for all I care," she continued bossily, "But the clothes you are wearing are going straight into the trash. I can see that you won't wear shoes until you are finished climbing all the trees around here but you'd better get used to dressing like one of us rather than a hobo."

"Um, thank-you?"

She grinned, "You're welcome!"

I wondered if I would have any choice over my wardrobe in the future.

"Absolutely none so get used to it!"


	9. 3am

**Chapter 9: Three am**

**Jackson**

I was flat on my back staring at the sky. I wanted to see the stars but all I could see were clouds. Snow was falling, as it had been for hours. Every few moments I wiped snowflakes away from my eyes to clear my vision.

I was amused by the image I must have presented. Any human who spotted me would think I was a dead body dumped in the forest.

The lust from the Cullen house had painted the whole building a faint orange, liberally sprinkled with flecks of dark pink. I had retreated as fast as possible to avoid the annoying wisps of emotions.

I recalled Emily, the newborn who occupied one of the few pleasant memories I carried from my days with Maria. She had been turned in the 1960s and her blood had been so potent with drugs that Maria had needed to hunt right away to get the taste out of her mouth. I had hoped she would end up giggling and stupid like humans on drugs but clearly they did not affect Vampires.

Emily had woken up seriously pissed off. I had dragged her off for a hunting trip immediately of course, but even after her thirst was sated she was still angry. When I had demanded to know why she had started screaming at me about being on fire for three days. I could tell she was holding the real reason back. Finally she had admitted that she was furious to know that drugs would not be able to affect her anymore. It was such a ridiculous reaction that I had started laughing at her.

She had lunged at me, a predictable move. I had her on the ground with her neck bared to my throat within a second. The aggression had died down but the fear I had expected barely registered. Instead there was lust.

It was not the first time I had felt such an emotion; Maria wore it like a cheap perfume around me. It was the first time I could see myself reciprocating the feeling.

I had kept her at a distance for the first few days, though I did watch her as she interacted with the other newborns. I always tried to remain detached from the newborns I would eventually have to kill, and just the thought of having to destroy her one day made me sad.

She had proved herself to be a reliable fighter. I liked the way she remained close during a battle. The first time she pulled an enemy off my back I felt a rush of appreciation which caught me by surprise.

Another month had passed before the lust and affection merged within her. Each time she noticed my presence the combination of emotions swirled around her enticingly. I could see that I was projecting the same feelings.

We had snuck away for some time alone that evening. Maria had come looking for me an hour later.

The steps of a Vampire lacking stealth draw me out of my memories. I did not need to have a watch to know that it must be three am.

I wiped another batch of snow off my face and turned my head to watch Carlisle approach. Did he ever stop smiling?

"I expected to find you up a tree," Carlisle said softly.

"I'm a log," I replied, "Or maybe a dead body; I haven't decided yet."

Amusement glowed around him, "Edward used to think he was a soulless dead thing before he met Bella. Realizing Vampires can procreate has changed his ideas about many things."

"Maybe I'll be a not-so-dead body then," I decided, "I wish the stars would come out again. I have never seen snow before I got here but I prefer the stars."

To my surprise Carlisle approached my position and sat down near me. I watched him stretch out to lie beside me.

"Alice will be annoyed that we have ruined our clothes," he mused, "Yet delighted that she gets to replace them."

"She is so happy all the time," I observed, "It's nice."

"Her emotional state is one of the reasons she is able to anchor Jasper here," Carlisle said freely, "I doubt he would have survived without her."

All of the females in the family were beautiful in their own way. If I could have designed a perfect mate I would take a few traits from each of them; assuming I knew what I needed rather than what I wanted. I wondered if Alice fitted the mate Jasper had imagined before he had met her.

"I appreciate you taking this time to get to know me," I said hesitantly, "But I am not sure what I am supposed to say."

"How about I begin by telling you my story? I can summarise how each family member joined me, while omitting the sensitive details they would prefer to share themselves."

"Sure."

The hour slipped by faster than I had thought possible. Carlisle had led a long an interesting life. He had just finished summarising how Esme had thrown herself off a cliff after her baby had died. Her abusive husband had been briefly mentioned and Carlisle had not been able to suppress the vestigial anger at his mate's former husband. I briefly wondered if that human had died at Esme's hands after she had awakened as a Vampire.

Before Carlisle left I thanked him for his time. I could tell he wanted to say something else but he only smiled and thanked me for listening to his tale.

I was left wondering how he wanted me to act during our nightly sessions. I tried to imagine myself in his position but for an Empath my imagination was limited of late.

The dawn was just another marker of the passage of time. I was not willing to venture closer to the house until someone came out to inform me that the tsunami of lust had dissipated.

The snow stopped falling but the sky remained overcast. No doubt the weather was one of the reasons the Cullen family had settled here.

Alice was a sneaky little Vampire but she could not hide her scent once the wind changed direction.

"Why would anyone try to surprise an unpredictable old soldier alone in the woods?" I wondered aloud, "I guess the Cullen's really are crazy."

The childish giggle accompanied the tendrils of amusement curling up behind a pile of snow. I did not see her move until the snowball was already in the air.

I was already covered in snow so the addition of another ball of it stuck to the side of my head seemed unnecessary.

"This could be considered an act of war," I pointed out calmly.

Alice grinned at me from a low-hanging tree branch. I regarded her with curiosity.

"Good morning Jackson," Alice chirped.

"Good morning Alice, I do like your impression of a bat. Do you think that's where the myth about Vampires transforming into them came from?"

"Maybe, but I always thought that was because Vampires hide in caves during the daylight and so do bats. They also come out at night and make weird noises. I've never tried a bat; I wonder what they taste like?"

Her emotions kept me buoyant, which was a very good thing as trying to keep up with her energy was exhausting.

"I have no idea."

I wanted to ask her how she knew Jasper was her mate as the bond fascinated me. I hoped that if I was able to learn as much about bonded pairs as possible I would recognise my own mate upon sight. Carlisle's story about meeting Esme ten years prior to turning her had unsettled me. Had the bond not been there or had he been stubborn enough to resist it?

Unfortunately she did not seem to be in the right frame of mind to have a meaningful discussion.

"What on earth did you do to your clothes?" Alice wondered, "Did you seriously snap that shirt in half while it was frozen?"

I shrugged. As long as my torso remained covered I did not care if it was snow or clothing obscuring the view.

"There is a nice cave not far from here," Alice added, "I'm going to take you there and then go fetch you some new clothes and some books."

"Why do I need new clothes if I'm going to hide in a cave?"

She didn't answer me, but I did end up in a damp, gloomy cave with a series of books about a wizard. Alice assured me they were really good but I did not trust her sense of taste after seeing the shirt she had picked out for me. How could I remain hidden in any tree in a blue and orange striped shirt?

Alice had decided I needed to read the Harry Potter books because they were about to begin school again. I did not agree with her logic but I could not be bothered arguing with her.

She had explained that Edward and Bella had finally passed the point of spending every minute of the day lusting after each other, so it was relatively safe for the family to enter into the human world again. Carlisle had been working at a hospital for a few years already, after telling the humans at the hospital that his children were home-schooled for health reasons.

Alice had explained the multitude of jokes Edward and Bella had endured about their mating drive being a hazard to the health of everyone in the area. For any other newly-mated couple she would have expected them to leave the family for a few years of solitude but their daughter had held them in place. Renesmee spent half the year with the Cullen's and the other half with her husband's family.

I had never encountered a shape-shifter or a werewolf, which had assured Alice that I would over-react when they returned. The disgusting smell the shape-shifters left all over the forest was enough to convince me to retain some distance from them anyway.

Rosalie and Emmett had opted to skip high school and enter college. Jasper and Bella were only going to endure one year of high school but Edward and Alice were signed up for two. I suspected Edward would be taking lunch breaks off school grounds to meet up with Bella.

I did not envy any of them. I had never given much thought to my human age when I had been turned until Rosalie had described the human image they had to maintain. I was sure even humans would question Emmett passing for a teenager when he looked to be in his early twenties; I would never have to endure that form of torture.

Endless nights of boredom loomed ominously in my future. I was sure Carlisle was so content because he had found a purpose in life working at the hospital. It made sense that having no clear direction led to dissatisfaction in life if my human memories were accurate. Sadly my career as a dead body would not be particularly fulfilling.

Carlisle returning the following morning at 3am to continue the story of the formation of his family. The surge of anger and pity he felt when he spoke of Rosalie being 'attacked and left for dead' indicated there was much more to the story than he would ever tell. I listened intently as he described Rosalie finding Emmett and carrying him to Carlisle to turn him. I knew I would have to gain Rosalie's trust before I could draw out details of how she had known Emmett was her mate.

I respected Carlisle for the position he held, and the awe of his achievements was rapidly growing. By the end of our third scheduled discussion I broached the subject of finding Esme.

"When she was sixteen I found her very interesting but I refused to rob her of the life she deserved to lead. I lost interest in my work and began to brood on my loneliness; it was during this period that I changed Edward. Looking back it seemed obvious that I was pining for Esme."

Edward was a very odd substitute for Esme, "Did Edward figure out the problem with his gift?"

Carlisle shrugged, "Perhaps, but he never mentioned it. I fear that my dislike for killing led Edward to dislike himself. I would hate to think that some of his self-loathing came from feeling he was made because I couldn't have the one I wanted."

It would explain much of Edward's moodiness, but being turned as a teenager would also be a huge factor in that.

"I am very curious about the mating bond," I admitted, "When you found Esme in the hospital, what prompted you to turn her?"

He stared into the distance thoughtfully, clearly measuring his words, "I am not sure. Something in me could not bear to see her die."

He had mentioned that Edward had said something similar when Bella's life had been endangered. I worried that if I my mate was human when I found her, I would be the danger to her life.


	10. Visitors

**Jackson**

A week had passed since I had been presented to the Cullen family like a stray pet. I had yet to step into the house but Carlisle had assured me that I was welcome to take as long as I needed to settle in.

Emmett was perpetually amused to find me perched in various trees and spent each dawn following my scent to the newest hiding spot. His tracking skills were rather poor but at least they existed.

Bella had joked about building a treehouse for me and Emmett had pounced on the idea with the enthusiasm of a child. Rosalie had shaken her head at him in exasperation but her emotions indicated how charmed she was by his behaviour.

Emmett tried to convince Jasper to help with the design and construction of the treehouse but the Major had politely refused. He had suggested an underground bunker instead, which had sparked another wave of excitement in the black-haired Vampire.

There was something completely disarming about Emmett. His kind nature and playful demeanour welcomed me into the Cullen family as no words possible could have.

Rosalie sought me out daily, usually under the pretext of checking to make sure her mate had not annoyed me to the point of losing a limb. She had Edward convinced that she was shallow and unfeeling but I knew there was much more to the beautiful Vampire than she would ever reveal. Her concern washed over me gently, and the trickle of affection was growing stronger every day.

Rosalie was determined to shift me into the main house. I recognised her intent even if she had not said a single word about it directly. She spoke about the rest of the family, their interactions and the human world in detail each day in an effort to make me feel included even while I remained outside. Emmett tried to fill in the blanks regarding their intimate activities but he had been silenced by a glare from his mate very quickly. The prospect of being surrounded by four mated couples with Vampire hearing and sense of smell was not appealing in the least. The treehouse Emmett was planning did seem to be the more attractive option.

I began to look forward to the dawn in anticipation of playing hide and seek with Emmett, usually followed by a long conversation with Rosalie. She explained her decision to study Psychology as an attempt to explain why Edward irritated her so much but I could sense that she was not as annoyed as she appeared. We smiled at each other knowingly and I was sure she was letting her cold façade drop on purpose. I wondered if one had to be an Empath or her mate to truly understand her.

While Jasper, Alice, Edward and Bella prepared to depart for school I let Rosalie lead me closer to the house. I ended up perched in the tree in the front yard but it was significantly closer to the front door than any of my previous resting places.

I watched Rosalie and Emmett leave to attend college classes hand in hand. Rosalie turned to wave at my concealed position discretely as she climbed into the passenger side of the shiny red car. I waved back half-heartedly, wondering if enjoying their company was a sign of weakness.

I mentally shook myself as the car engine rumbled to life. I was no longer in a war zone; my life did not depend on my ability to present an image of ruthless violence to keep threats at bay.

The front door opened again. I considered retreating to the forest but it was an option rather than a fear-fuelled need. Instead I watched as the four Vampires walked toward another car, the telepath in the lead.

"You owe me twenty bucks," Bella said to her mate with a radiant smile, "He didn't run."

The absurdity of betting on my decisions sapped away the last of my fear. If the telepath couldn't predict my moves in the front yard I doubted he could kill me in single combat.

"A Whitlock only runs to gain a strategic advantage," Jasper rumbled. He sounded gruff even with the amusement swirling around him.

"Unless Alice wants to straighten your hair again," Edward chuckled, "You could have outpaced me that day."

The laughter was genuine. I enjoyed the positive emotions sailing through the air before they dissipated. I tried to imagine tiny Alice chasing Jasper in an attempt to change his hairstyle. She had certainly been persistent enough to force me to change my clothes every two days. It was easier to obey her orders even though I didn't believe she would actually tear them off me and leave me naked in the forest if I refused to cooperate.

"It was a well-defined battle strategy to avoid the hair-straightener," Jasper pointed out, "I expect the curling iron she ordered off of Ebay will chase both of you away too."

The amusement was quickly replaced by apprehension. I smothered a smile at the cyclone of excitement swirling around Alice. She was begging Bella to let her curl the brunette's hair by the time they drove away. I had seen many strange occurrences in my long life but watching Vampires voluntarily repeat school again and again was perplexing on a whole new level.

Carlisle was at the hospital, surrounded by bleeding humans. The self-control he exhibited continued to stun me every time he returned smelling of temptation. I watched him with curiosity every time I was able, though I was sure I would never be able to understand him. The bloodlust I could feel from each of the others at various times was almost absent for him. I wondered if his self-control was a talent far more useful than empathy or mind-reading.

Carlisle's leadership was so different to what I had known that I struggled to find aspects to compare with Maria. I feared the loyalty Carlisle commanded from the Cullen's even while as an individual he did not intimidate me. I had studied the conversation from the day of the hunt from every angle I could conceive and I could only conclude that he really did want to help me. I knew that in his place I would not be as generous.

This was the first time I had been left at home with Esme. Though I was not technically in the home I knew it was a measure of trust in me that none of the others had lingered to make sure the mate of the coven leader was not harmed.

Esme was working on the plans for the four cottages which were going to be built. Rosalie had hinted that Esme would welcome my opinions during the day while she ordered materials and perfected the designs. Instead I remained up a tree, paying attention to the peaceful emotions she exuded.

Listening to Esme speak to the humans supplying the materials was interesting. I was curious about the modern telephone as I could only vaguely remember the one my parents had used. Maria had a mobile telephone hidden away which no-one else was allowed to touch. I had only seen it a few times when she had required my 'services' and had not bothered to conceal it.

I pushed aside the unhappy memories. I hated that every train of thought circled back to images I wanted to forget. I envied humans sometimes and the ability to let a memory fade away into insignificance was one I coveted.

Esme moved toward the front door at human speed. I could feel her emotional signature strengthen as she approached my position. The curiosity almost masked the apprehension. The flash of fear was predictable due to my scars but it quickly dispersed.

"Good morning Jackson," she greeted with a smile.

"Good morning Ma'am," I replied quietly. The moment of fear saddened me, which was irrational. The very sight of my ravaged skin was a billboard to any sane Vampire that I had earned their fright many times over.

"I have to do the weekly shopping today," Esme continued, "It would look rather strange if a family as large as ours did not rack up a hefty bill at the supermarket each week."

"What do you do with the food?"

She smiled again. I felt myself lean forward involuntarily, drawn in by her charm. The image of falling out of the tree at her feet encouraged me to tighten my grip on the branch I was holding.

"While Jacob, Leah and Seth live with us, they eat the lot. Once they leave we donate it to charity. I try to stock up on canned goods so they last longer," she watched me thoughtfully; "Do you draw? When Jasper first joined us he spent hours drawing pictures and writing in a stack of journals."

"I have never tried drawing since I was changed," I admitted.

"I'll get you some anyway," she decided aloud.

An alarming scent was carried on the breeze. I dropped to the ground without thinking and kept my back to Esme to shield her from the incoming Vampires. The grumble which built up in my chest was not overly aggressive, and just loud enough to warn the intruders that I was not happy about their presence.

Two Vampires ran toward us; one male and the other female. They stopped at the bottom of the driveway and regarded me curiously. I remained standing tall as they observed my appearance and fell into the grip of fear. The long-sleeved shirt Alice had provided for me covered the scars which I preferred to display when threatened. The moment of hesitation they often brought me had made the difference in multiple confrontations. If they made any move to attack I would aim for one of the arms of the male to twist off and throw away before turning on the female with the same intent.

"Jackson," Esme said from behind me, "It's safe. This is Eleazar and Carmen, cousins of ours."

The golden eyes of the two visitors had been irrelevant while I was expecting to be attacked. Esme was worried about me but not afraid of the other two.

I stepped to the side slowly to allow Esme to see the cousins. I considered retreating to the forest but even if they were friendly I did not want to leave Esme alone with Vampires not of the coven.

_Family_, I corrected myself as I scaled the tree I had just vacated.

The female smiled at my antics, her black hair reminding me of Maria. Her emotions were completely different thankfully. The male watched me with undisguised curiosity.

"This is Jackson," Esme introduced as though I was standing right next to her, "Jackson, this is Eleazar and Carmen. We have known the Denali family for decades."

"Hello Jackson," Carmen said, her accent sending another chill of recognition through me. She emphasised the words as did many others whose first language was Spanish.

"Hello," I wondered if these Denali Vampires measured themselves against human standards too. If so, they would probably think I was being deliberately rude.

"Your resemblance to Jasper is remarkable," Eleazar commented as he approached Esme to give her a greeting hug. I did not like the exchange due to how vulnerable she was to his teeth but did not allow myself to react. The hug from Carmen was infinitely more stressful; I had to remind myself that it was not Maria leaning toward gentle Esme, but a friend.

"How old were you when you were changed?" Eleazar continued, "It is always hard to tell with Vampires but you do look a few years older than Jasper."

"Thirty-two," I managed. I attempted to reign in my irritation at the personal question.

"A good age," Carmen commented with a smile, "You could live in a place for up to twenty years if you wanted."

She had a dimple which drew my attention. Every feature which differentiated her from Maria helped me to remain relatively calm.

"Tanya is quite excited to come for a visit," Eleazar added with a smile, "After Carlisle called we knew we would drop by soon. The weather today cancelled our other plans. I hope we are not inconveniencing you?"

"Not at all," Esme replied, "I was going to go shopping and do some gardening; both of which can be put off. How are Kate and Garrett enjoying mated life?"

Five Vampires. Rosalie had mentioned that the Denali Coven was to the east of our current home but I had not realized they were so close they could make a decision to visit and arrive before Alice could warn Esme about it.

Esme invited the two of them inside to continue the conversation. I wondered if the three of them would go to the human supermarket for the food to be purchased.

I dropped out of the tree once they were in the house. I stared at Carmen's black hair and listened to her voice as she described how anxious Tanya was to meet me. Rosalie had mentioned that Tanya was blonde so I did not have to worry about another female who ignited memories of Maria turning up.

Carmen turned to glance at me and the smile faded from her fade. Clearly the distress I was feeling and involuntarily projecting was affecting her.

Eleazar watched me too and the urge to flee surged within me. I could not allow Esme to remain unprotected so I stood tall to project confidence I did not feel. I considered pushing up the sleeves of my shirt but logically I did not need to scare this couple.

Esme disappeared from my sight. I knew she was safe but I could not leave her vulnerable.

It was an act of sheer willpower which allowed me to step into the house.


	11. Protector

**Jackson**

Carmen shifted closer to her mate as I stepped into the living room. I made sure my movements were confident and predatory as I moved around so I was standing with my back to the wall not far from Esme.

The shrill ring of a mobile phone sent tension shooting through me. I kept my eyes on the strangers while Esme answered her phone.

_"Hi Esme,"_ it was Alice's voice, _"Jackson is staying close to protect you. He won't leave your side until Carlisle comes home in a couple of hours. Tanya is planning to visit tomorrow; it's hard to tell what time. Make sure Jackson gets the gift I left for him."_

"Thank-you Alice," Esme said with a gentle laugh, "I am sure Jackson will love the gift."

Carmen and Eleazar sat down on the lounge as though they were humans. The orange mating bond between them was strong. I studied it carefully, wondering if it had formed instantly or if it had developed over time. It reminded me of a rope with each strand a slightly different shade of orange.

"So Jackson, do you think you will be permanently converting to our diet?" Eleazar asked.

The hum of conversation had been comforting because attention had been pointedly directed away from me. It had always been safer to duck under the radar when Maria was pissed off.

"Yes, I could not imagine returning to feeding off humans," I admitted quietly.

Carmen smiled at me. It was a genuine smile, without any hint of manipulation. I almost smiled back.

"We have had to listen to Tanya ask ridiculous questions for three days straight," Carmen said with a small laugh, "She refuses to make a decision to visit so Alice can't see if the two of you are going to get along well."

"Why doesn't she just come meet me?" I wondered aloud.

"Carlisle asked her to wait at least a week," Eleazar confided, "To give you a chance to settle in. Don't be surprised if she is a nervous wreck by the time she shows up."

I did not like the idea of distressing this Vampire I had never met. It felt unnecessary; either she was my mate or she wasn't. What was the point of postponing our meeting? I seriously doubted she would find me at all interesting.

I had not allowed myself to consider the possibility that Tanya was destined to be my mate. I had only had two lovers in my immortal life; Emily had ended up dead and none of the other experiences had been pleasurable.

"Jackson?" Esme's voice trembled. I realized that I was projecting my distress.

I muttered an apology and reigned in my emotions but the concern still glowed around her. I wished I could remember my mortal mother so Esme didn't slip into the role; physically she was younger than me which made it weird.

Carmen and Eleazar remained for another hour and to my great relief I was not required to join in the conversation. As they were leaving they addressed me but a soft good-bye was all I could manage.

I hated being indoors. I felt completely trapped. Maria always had a thing for privacy when she was horny; being indoors meant she required my services. For decades I had wished she would just learn to get herself off. Most of all I regretted that I had not just left at the first opportunity.

Esme escorted Eleazar and Carmen to the door as the sound of Carlisle's car approached. I followed a few metres behind, knowing I would be able to retreat to the forest again once I was sure Esme was safe. It was an old instinct, and one which was clearly unnecessary but I followed it anyway. I suspected that Jasper retained many of his old habits too; the Cullen's were so intent on acting human that they left themselves vulnerable.

Carlisle was speaking happily to the visitors when I emerged through the front door. He had his arm around his mate, the signal to me that my protection was no longer needed. I wondered if he even knew the subtle signals of communication between Vampires outside of his family.

The wave of pride which inundated me came from Carlisle. I was surprised at first, though it made sense that he was proud of me for entering the house without prompting.

I was back in the tree in the front yard before Eleazar and Carmen disappeared into the forest. I was relieved to see the back of them; Carmen's resemblance to Maria left me on edge.

Affection swirled around Carlisle and Esme. Carlisle greeted me politely but I could see the emotions growing between them; lust being rather prominent.

Even though both of them were younger than me physically, they were older as Vampires. I doubted I would ever be able to see them as 'parents' like the others did but I did not want to be anywhere near them while their thoughts were creating such desire.

I followed the trail that the two departing Vampires had left at a slow pace to make sure I didn't catch up to them. I hoped they had not decided to linger in the area.

Carlisle's footsteps followed me heavily. I waited out of respect and curiosity.

"I'm glad you didn't go too far, apparently Esme needed to give this to you," he held out a bulky package as wide as he was.

Receiving a gift was odd, as there was no expectation behind it. Carlisle simply instructed me to thank Alice when she came home and then left to return to Esme.

Maria had only ever given me a gift when she wanted something immediately in return. Usually the trinket she presented was not worth the emotional toll of spending the night with her.

I opened the parcel gingerly. Though I was sure Alice would never give me anything dangerous I opened the ties at a human pace so I could drag out the experience.

The first thing I saw was a shirt, which didn't make sense as the one I was wearing was different to the one from the previous day. A net also spilled out, along with a small booklet and a few other pieces of cloth. I recognised the general shape of a hammock and smiled at the image of tying it up in a treetop and gazing at the sky. It was always impossible to truly relax while lying on the ground as Vampires could move so fast I would only have seconds to react to their approach.

I spent a couple of hours searching for the perfect tree. I wanted secure the hammock as high as possible but most of the branches were too flimsy to support it and my weight. I did not relish the idea of plummeting to the ground as soon as a strong wind flared up.

The tree I finally chose was closer to the house than I had wanted but it was strong and would give me a great view of the stars on a clear night. Based on previous experience I would be just far enough away to avoid being able to sense the emotions of anyone in the house.

I enjoyed tying the hammock in place, though the sense of pride at my accomplishment did seem rather ridiculous. I wondered if Emmett was really going to build me a treehouse as it would be funny to have a private retreat out of sight in the forest.

The scorching burn of hunger repressed for too long seared my throat before I realized what I was smelling. There was a human nearby.

I abandoned the hammock, dropped to the ground and took off running. I was a missile on course to decimate my prey. The memory of the taste of human blood urged me on.

Another memory intruded before I left the cover of the forest. The emotional impact of killing, the disorientation, fear and self-loathing crashed into my mind.

I froze in place. I wanted the blood so badly, but I also knew I wanted to resist. My mind was so addled in that moment that I wasn't sure exactly why I wanted to abstain, just that it had been a good idea up until a few seconds ago.

Carlisle and Esme crashed through the undergrowth. I heard the rumble of a motorbike approach but did not recognise it. Why would a human venture all the way out here?

Carlisle slowed his approach when he realized I was standing still. I was still transfixed by the amazing scent even when it was tainted by the exhaust from the vehicle.

"I'm sorry," Carlisle said quickly, "I should have taken you hunting before this."

Carlisle and Esme flanked me on either side but I could not force myself to move. It was taking all my willpower not to run toward the human.

Carlisle gripped my upper arm with his hand. I watched him warily but there was no anger or condemnation in him.

"Let's go," he prompted.

I allowed him to lead me deeper into the wilderness but my mind was back at the house. If Carlisle hadn't come out would I have lost the battle to remain in place before the human left? Would I have endangered the entire family because I could not resist?

"Alice called," Esme said softly, "She was not sure if you would be able to resist as it has been a week since you hunted. You did remarkably well to stop yourself."

She was being honest, which I appreciated. I did not think I deserved her praise but I was grateful for it.

"Jasper would have killed him a week into living here," Carlisle explained, "Was there something in particular which stopped you?"

"No."

"Jasper lived in the main house from his first day," Esme commented, "Which probably made his hunger seven times more intense."

That made sense. Emmett's idea to build me a treehouse was suddenly very smart; I did not want to spend decades learning to control my thirst if I could avoid it.

Esme remained close but Carlisle was even worse. He led me to the scent of a bear but I could not begin the hunt with him so close. Intellectually I knew he was no threat but all of my instincts screamed that it was stupid to expose my back to him in order to hunt.

"How long did it take Jasper to allow you to see him hunt?" I asked quietly, hoping he would understand the double meaning of the question.

Carlisle watched me carefully, "A few years. I can withdraw out of sight but I don't want to go too far."

I nodded, knowing he was being cautious. The scent of the bear was more interesting than the reindeer but both were vile compared to human blood.

I hunted as fast as possible, allowing the bear to swipe at me more than once. I sank my teeth into his throat while he was still roaring and felt his claws shred my clothing.

When I had drained him I stood completely still. Blood had dotted my bare torso and my clothing was beyond repair. My lower body was mostly covered, except for a long section of my thigh which was exposed to the chilly air. Only one scrap of my shirt remained on my shoulder.

"Dammit to hell," I muttered, "Alice is going to have a field day."

From the left Carlisle chuckled but the mirth quickly faded when he caught sight of me. I didn't like my scars and made every effort to ignore them. Sadly it was impossible to ignore the pity and concern welling up inside of him.

I sighed, knowing Jasper's scars must be just as bad. I was sure the Major had managed to hide his for more than a week though.

I reasoned that Carlisle was a doctor; he had probably seen much worse on the humans he had treated. The pity probably stemmed from his inability to heal my wounds; or that was what I told myself anyway.

He helped me to bury the remains of the bear but his eyes kept flicking back to me. He would probably have the insane pattern of my chest, back and neck memorised by the time we were done. Even I was not sure how many bite marks covered my arms anymore.

Carlisle led the way back toward the house, a journey which I dreaded. I could handle pity from Carlisle but I was not sure how Esme would react. I did not want her to fear me.

The small cry from Esme reminded me of a wounded bird. She stared at me with wide eyes which would have been filled with tears if she was able.

"Will the human be gone by now?" I asked Carlisle, trying valiantly to ignore the tornado of emotions coming from his mate.

"Yes, the postman will have left by now."

I ran as fast as I was able, not stopping until I was back in the treetop with the hammock. I picked up the shirt which Alice had given me, annoyed that she had probably seen my ugly torso too.


	12. Comfort

**Jackson**

I remained in the hammock for the rest of the day. I heard Carlisle and Esme pass below on their way back to the house. I was sure I had spoiled the mood with my bloodlust and bare skin.

I had tied the tattered remains of the previous shirt around a tree branch for safe keeping. I did not want to litter the forest and I was not in the mood to approach the house to dispose of it.

I missed sleeping. While with Maria it had been great not to get tired or need sleep but now I wanted to be able to switch off. I had lived on the Vampire version of adrenalin for so long that my mind was exhausted. If only my body was capable of sinking into unconsciousness without killing a human first; that way was never pleasant.

Instead I rested the only way I knew how; I remained completely still and closed my eyes. One day when someone studied the Vampire brain maybe they would discover that we rested more like dolphins; one side of the brain at a time. I had often wondered if the layered thinking of a Vampire was the 'awake' part of the day and the moments when a single thought could block out all others for hours on end was 'sleep'.

Either way, it was a poor substitute for being completely knocked out like humans experienced.

Edward, Bella, Alice and Jasper returned from school in the afternoon. I did not care as long as I was left alone. I let the sadness and general apathy wash over me like rain since it was just as unstoppable.

The cloud of indifference I was projecting reached to the ground, but only someone standing directly below my chosen perch would be affected. I doubted any of the Cullen's would be stupid enough to seek me out in this mood.

Once again I had underestimated the insanity of the Vampire family.

The Vampire climbing my tree was rather stealthy so even without opening my eyes I knew it wasn't Emmett. The wind was blowing in the wrong direction for me to be able to identify the interloper by scent alone.

The movement stopped nearby. It was amazing the difference a week could make. On the day I had arrived I would have been growling as soon as the Vampire began scaling the tree. Today I just wanted them to fall off the branch.

"Now I know how annoying I can be when I sulk," Jasper said flatly.

I opened one eye. Of all the Vampires who could have come to see me, I did not expect Jasper to be the first one to try to cheer me up.

Considering the way he was watching me, his plan may have involved breaking the tree to dump me to the ground.

"How was school?" I asked with a hint of sarcasm.

He rolled his eyes, "Wonderful. I didn't kill anyone even though every teenage boy stares at my mate with his tongue hanging out."

"I think you should be allowed to kill at least one per week," I mused.

I wanted to be alone and yet I didn't. In a weird way I missed Maria; on very rare occasions she would lay with me without making any demands. I was homesick for that level of closeness and comfort.

"Shit," Jasper sighed.

"Actually my name is pronounced 'Jackson'," I corrected, closing my eyes again.

"Alice sent me up here to check on you. Apparently if I let her come up here we would get into a fight and rip apart your new hammock."

I didn't bother replying; I didn't need to hear about how whipped he was.

I could hear the rustling as he moved. I assumed he was leaving until I felt the hammock move.

I hoped he was going to offer me his friendship as Vampires away from this family were prone to do. If Alice had climbed into the hammock with me it would have been too intimate for Jasper to stand; I could understand the fight she had predicted.

I nearly fell out of the hammock as Jasper shifted his weight from the tree. I watched him warily as he settled into lie beside me. I was in a rather vulnerable position; if nothing went wrong this would be a huge step toward a bond of friendship between us.

I remained still other than clutching the edges of the hammock for dear life. Finally Jasper settled his body against mine, and rested his head on my shoulder. He kept his hands tucked against his chest and kept his pelvis away from my thigh; that was not the type of intimacy either of us wanted.

My arms remained on my stomach. I knew he was trying to offer his allegiance to me the way we had learned in Maria's army.

The slightest grumble from his chest indicated his annoyance. I let myself relax gradually so the strands of his hair brushed against my cheek.

It had been different with Maria of course; she had a physical interest in me. Emily had also displayed a similar path of thought. Never before had I been able to accept the comfort of another Vampire with the complete lack of attraction or expectation. It was odd but nice.

One day in the future I hoped I would be able to purr to vocalise my appreciation for his effort. I could see that he was uncomfortable reviving old habits; they probably reminded him of the life which had scarred us both.

Alice appeared after an hour. She sat in the tree where Jasper had been and watched us with a smile. I could feel the pride she was aiming at both of us.

"Can I join in now?" Alice whispered.

Jasper sighed, "Fine, but you know the rules."

So did I; no pelvis contact unless you were interested in sex and arms remained close to the body until total trust had been proved and accepted.

Alice climbed onto my other side. The hammock swing wildly as she giggled. Jasper and I grumbled at the disturbance.

Alice let her legs dangle over my side of the hammock and laid back to put her head on the side of Jasper's stomach. She was so light that I barely felt the weight of her backside against my hip. Clearly she liked using the two of is as a strange bed.

"Comfortable sweetheart?" Jasper asked. His hand traced over her short hair and she nuzzled his palm.

"Very."

She kept her hands clasped in front of her but her smile was for both of us.

"Have you ever tried this with one of the others?" I asked curiously.

Jasper chuckled, clearly recalling a memory. I waited for him to share.

"Edward was particularly depressed one day," Alice began, "Jasper warned me to leave him alone but I couldn't just leave him to suffer."

"He didn't understand," Jasper continued, "He thought she was interested in him sexually and I was going to kill him."

I laughed softly at that image. After being raised by Carlisle and acting human for so long the rest of the Cullen's were understandably clueless.

"He wasn't depressed after that," Alice added, "A bit scared that I would try to cuddle up to him again, but not depressed."

"It was almost funny the way the entire family freaked out. We ended up having to explain to Carlisle that Alice was just trying to offer the Vampire version of a reassuring conversation," Jasper mused.

"He was confused but accepted that we were not trying to make Edward uncomfortable," Alice added, "It was slightly better with Emmett."

"Better how?"

Alice grinned and the faint trace of embarrassment churned around Jasper, "Rosalie was pissed at him, and Jasper nuzzled his neck, kind of like he is doing now."

"I wasn't thinking," Jasper admitted to my collarbone, "It had been years since Emmett had intimidated me or shown any fear so I acted on instinct."

Alice cackled at the sky, "The look on Emmett's face was priceless. I think his exact words were 'you are seriously freaking me out right now Jasper. Does Alice know you're bisexual?'."

It was an amusing image. I asked Jasper how he had reacted to the odd question.

"I told him he had no idea how real Vampires interacted, and that I had no interest in him that way," Jasper said, annoyed even as he recalled the conversation, "Sometimes I think Carlisle made a huge mistake with all his human behaviours; most males think bonding with family has to involve beer or football."

"Or both," Alice chimed in.

"So how are they going to react when they spot us out here like this?" I wondered aloud.

Alice grinned mischievously, "Emmett is going to come out of the house in sixteen minutes. He will see us, freeze in place and then bolt back inside. He is going to tell Edward to come out and read our minds to make sure we haven't had a threesome."

Jasper laughed at the absurd idea, "I bet Edward is so disturbed he refuses to come out of the house."

"I'll take that bet," Alice replied.

"Never; you're not allowed to bet against anyone unless Jake is here to stuff up your visions."

Alice pouted, "Spoilsport. Anyway, Edward will venture out only when Carlisle orders him to."

"What is Edward's problem anyway?" I asked, "Even Emmett described him as having a stick up his backside."

"Edward was born in 1901," Alice explained, "He had the moral beliefs and other crap from the Victorian era cemented into his head before he was turned. Having to witness the sex-capades of Emmett and Rosalie for decades didn't help."

"Bella has her work cut out for her," I mused.

"She doesn't take his crap, that's for sure," Jasper added, "It was harder while she was human but now she doesn't hesitate to grab his ear and boss him around when he is being an idiot."

"What's she like?" Of all the family members, I had interacted with Bella the least.

"She is stubborn as anything," Alice said happily, "Which is exactly what Edward needs. She always thinks of others and has the courage to act on her convictions."

I was still insanely curious about Edward and Bella's courtship but I was not sure how to bring it up.

"She was never afraid of us," Jasper added, "Even when she cut herself and I tried to attack her she was more worried about me."

"That makes sense; if she was the destined mate for a Vampire she would have no fear of him and by extension, those he trusted," I pondered.

"Edward went through an idiot stage after that, but it all worked out in the end," Alice said, "I'm hoping finding you a mate will be much less drama."

"Excuse me?" I replied, my voice too shrill to be considered normal, "When were you going to include me in your plotting?"

Alice shrugged, "That depends on your reaction. If you are going to go all self-sacrificial and stupid like Edward I'll keep as many secrets as I need to."

"Did you know he was going to meet Bella? Did he?"

"I knew for a couple of weeks beforehand. He remained clueless until she walked into the room. As a matter of fact, he is still clueless about heaps of stuff."

I heard Emmett stomping through the forest muttering to himself. He stopped abruptly but I was too far away to read his emotions.

"Shock," Jasper whispered just loud enough for Alice and I to hear, "Panic, confusion, curiosity."

"He's running back to the house," Alice giggled.

I rolled my eyes, "Come on, it's not as if we're making out or something."

Alice winked at me, "No making out with distant relatives; if Vampires could have heart attacks that would kill half the family."

"I can admit you're good looking," Jasper laughed, "But you're not my type."

"He's a legs man," Alice clarified, "Your knees would give him nightmares if he could sleep."

"Alice, would you please stop talking about my nephew like that?"

Nephew. It was strange to think that the Major who I had heard stories about for decades was my great-great uncle or whatever.


	13. Making a Point

**Jackson**

It felt nice being included in the plot Alice suggested. Jasper rolled his eyes but agreed to cooperate. I didn't really see the point of unnerving the rest of the family but I was following Alice so I could enter the house without being the centre of attention.

Alice grabbed my hand while Jasper slid his arm around her tiny waist. She timed our entrance so no-one was able to see us until we were settled on the lounge.

Alice sat in the centre of the two cushions. Jasper sat next to her, and then promptly swung his legs around to hang over the arm-rest. His head rested on her thigh where he gazed up at her adoringly.

I paused, waiting for an indication of where I was supposed to sit or sprawl.

"Mirror image," Alice said with a wink as she patted her other thigh.

I moved with more hesitation than Jasper. Though Alice had a plan in her mind I wasn't quite as comfortable with using her lap as a pillow. I rested my head closer to her knee and turned my neck so I still had a clear view of the rest of the room. Like Jasper, my legs hung over the edge of the armrest. I imagined our position must have appeared quite comical.

I felt one of Alice's hands caress my hair and a very soft purr rumbled through me.

Alice giggled, which made Jasper grumble. I wondered if the rest of the family would find our vocalisations meaningless. Alice liked that I was purring but Jasper was warning both of us that he had the first and only claim on Alice that really mattered.

Not to be outdone, Jasper began purring loud and uninterrupted. If we were human we might have engaged in arm wrestling or a burping contest.

Emmett thundered down the stairs and then froze on the bottom step. As instructed, we all ignored his presence and the horrified expression on his face.

Edward's approach was almost silent. He peered over his brother's shoulder with a similar reaction.

"Would you two move it?" Rosalie snapped from further up the stairs.

Emmett and Edward shuffled forward, which brought them into the lounge room. Rosalie glanced at the three of us without interest. Even if her mate was convinced there was something going on, she did not believe it for a second.

Bella wasn't far behind Rosalie and she did not hesitate to enter the living room and sit down on the couch.

"It's good to see you again Jackson," she said with a smile, "I'm sure you will still get a tree-house but I'm glad you trust us enough to come indoors."

"Bella," Edward hissed, "Drop the shield."  
"No."

Bella picked up the television remote and began to flick through the channels looking for something to watch; my admiration for her climbed even higher.

Bella patted the chair next to her. Edward glanced at Alice warily before lowering himself to sit next to his wife.

Emmett just stared at us. Rosalie re-entered the room and caught his elbow with one hand.

"Weren't we going hunting?" she asked, clearly happy to continue to ignore the spectacle Alice was enjoying. If I didn't know Vampires couldn't sleep I would expect Jasper to start snoring, his emotions were so calm and soothing. Only his continued purring proved he was still very much conscious.

"I have to ask Rose," Emmett pleaded.

Rosalie huffed in annoyance, "Why?"

Edward and Emmett shared a glance. The amusement was pouring off Alice in waves.

Carlisle descended the stairs with Esme right behind him. His eyebrows shot up when he caught sight of Jasper and I cuddled up to Alice but he was also too polite to ask outright.

"This is ridiculous," Rosalie said with a glare around the room, "Alice, can you please tell my mate and the other idiots in this family that the three of you are not involved?"

Bella smiled at the television but did not comment. The embarrassment swirled around Emmett and Edward vividly. Carlisle was mainly curious.

"Involved?" Alice repeated with practised innocence, "What do you mean?"

Emmett's mouth opened and closed a few times but he didn't manage to form a coherent word.

"I believe Alice and Jasper are trying to make a point," Bella said, still watching the television.

Edward stared at her in confusion. It was concerning that he was so clueless when his mate could figure us out so easily.

"Jackson is struggling to learn our 'human' ways, and we should try to open our minds to the traditional 'Vampire' ways," Rosalie pointed out acidly, "I can't believe anyone is really thick enough to believe there is a threesome being planned."

"Threesome?" Jasper repeated, "Who's planning a threesome?"

Esme and Bella could not contain their laughter while Edward, Emmett and Carlisle clung to their confusion. Rosalie stomped out of the house muttering about 'idiotic men'.

"Are you sure you're not gay Jackson?" Emmett asked, "Usually it wouldn't matter but Jasper is your uncle or whatever."

"Not at all," I replied serenely, "Whatever gave you that impression?"

"Bella," Edward pleaded.

"Edward, try asking a question for once rather than fishing in someone's thoughts for the answer," she replied.

"Use your words Edward," Alice teased.

Carlisle was openly smiling at the childish humour on display.

"So this was all a joke to freak us out?" Emmett asked in disbelief.

"All what?" Alice wondered.

"Bella, please."

"Oh fine you stubborn doofus."

Edward stared at Alice, Jasper and myself with renewed intensity as Bella dropped her shield. I watched him with curiosity. How had he survived alone for so many decades without the reassuring cuddle and purr of his coven-mates?

"I assume there is a point to this display of affection?" Carlisle asked calmly.

Alice smiled at him, "Actually, yes. When Jasper first arrived no-one understood how to comfort him. I did what I could but no-one ever realised that they could have contributed too. There is no need for Jackson to suffer out of learned ignorance. This is normal and expected behaviour of Vampires who care for a coven member who needs reassurance."

"Like when you tried to help me," Edward recalled, the tendrils of embarrassment slowly twisting through the air around him.

Bella laughed, "Please tell me how you reacted to that?"

"Not well," Edward admitted.

"Emmett was nearly as bad," Jasper added.

"I have to go hunting," Emmett muttered just before he left.

Carlisle was curious about the different actions which announced the benign intentions of Vampires toward others who were not their mates. Esme listened intently but like Bella and Rosalie I suspected that the explanations made sense on an instinctual level that her mate could not reach.

I was musing how women were always more intuitive when Edward's gaze shifted to me abruptly.

"Cats," he blurted out.

"More information needed," Bella prompted. I suspected she often had to ask for clarification on ideas Edward didn't bother to explain properly.

"Women understand cats more than most men," he said hurriedly, "Because of their understanding of body language, empathy and such. Vampires have many of those odd characteristics which males can struggle to interpret."

"Edward, are you saying male Vampires who are not Empathic have issues understanding others?" Alice asked coyly.

His brow furrowed, "Maybe."

Esme laughed, "My sweet boy, I could have told you that decades ago."

I lost interest in the conversation as my attention focused on Bella. She was obviously beautiful and intelligent, but the insightful way she saw people roused my interest too. My mental checklist of a future mate had another quality added to it.

As a human Bella must have been awed by Edward; it was simply what our species was designed to do. My insatiable curiosity and vivid imagination attempted to fill in the gaps in my knowledge. Was their relationship stronger when she was turned? Had she been disappointed once the supernatural allure was simply normality?

Edward narrowed his eyes at me. A week earlier I would have been intimidated but somehow I was no longer affected. Alice's hand continued to play with one of the blonde curls at my temple, reminding me of the comfortable position I was in.

Had he not been so stubborn and prudish his decades alone could have been much easier. Even if his upbringing could not accept such touches from a male, one of the females could have been there to help. Knowing your family and friends cared about you was different to being able to physically lean on them for support when you were emotionally exhausted.

Had Bella's arrival really solved all of his isolation issues? Considering how aloof he held himself, and how guilty he seemed every time I pointed out that he was probably reading my thoughts I doubted it.

Something akin to fear hovered at the edges of his emotional profile. After so long reading the thoughts of others I could only imagine how distressing being analysed emotionally would be. The real question was how Jasper had managed to refrain from such scrutiny or hide the knowledge from the telepath.

"I think I will go hunting too," Edward said softly as he excused himself. Bella watched him with a calculating expression before her eyes flicked to me. So easily she had deduced that I had thought something which had prompted her husband to seek escape.

"Count me in," Bella said with fake nonchalance. The deep golden of their eyes was visible evidence of their feeble excuse. No-one questioned their departure.

The conversation turned to the handful of cottages being planned for each couple to ensure more privacy within the family. I wanted to leave to see if I could speak to Edward but I wasn't sure of how to leave without being rude.

"Go on Jackson," Alice encouraged with a smile, "I know you don't care about the new buildings as long as you get your tree house."

I smiled back gratefully as I left the room. Jasper continued to purr like an attention seeking cat on a warm day.

Edward's scent led straight into the forest, as did Bella's. I stopped just inside the tree line, listening to the noises of the trees, animals and leaves on the forest floor. The slight crackle ahead of my indicated the light tread of Vampire feet but the silence of the birds and insects revealed more.

_Edward, can I speak with you please?_ Considering how 'human' everyone wanted to act I was sure manners were going to be useful.

Edward stepped out from behind the distant tree where he had concealed himself to sulk.

"I was not sulking," he argued, "At most, I was brooding."

"Whatever. It's not a crime to sulk anyway; I spent half the day depressing every forest creature within range."

He studied me for several seconds, far longer than necessary. I wondered what he was so reluctant to say.

"Forever curious," he muttered, "I swear you wonder about everything more than you create an original thought."

I wondered if he was trying to insult me, then decided I didn't care.

"There you go again."

"You're trying to distract me and it's not going to work," I said pointedly, "I wanted to apologize if I upset you before."

Edward shrugged, "I'm used to ignoring thoughts I have no right to hear. It's a form of Karma."

"So I'm saying them out loud so you have every right to hear them; you're too uptight and have become too accustomed to being a know-it-all," I said bluntly.

Edward stared at me, anger growing at the edge of his aura.

"But that's okay," I continued, "Based on the life you have led I can totally understand why you act the way you do. Based on my life I am going to be an inept idiot when it comes to courting a mate and I would like your assistance with that."

"In what way?"

I sighed, "Alice said you have a few 'idiot' moments while Bella was still human and I am sure I am going to have many of those. Emmett will point them out with the subtlety of a truck and Rosalie will pretend to be a bitch while going out of her way to look out for me. I need to know that you will be there to balance them."

Edward was startled and rather confused. I had learned to hold my tongue while Maria held the power, and my internal monologue had developed in turn. Having a mind-reader in the proximity made it pointless to try to censure my musings anymore.

"I'm not sure how I can help," Edward admitted.

"I don't want to pry, but if you know anything that can help me along the way I would appreciate it. Jasper is helping me to translate Cullen reactions into something I can understand but I will need more. If I'm lucky it will be advice on Tanya but if fate hates me it will be tips on how not to kill my mate."

"Sometimes you are so like Jasper it is uncanny, but right now I can't see the resemblance at all."

"Maybe he's just better at hiding his thoughts? I've stopped trying."

"So I've noticed."


	14. Tanya

**Jackson**

By the time I was settled back in my hammock I was already regretting my brash behaviour. It was not the first time my increased confidence had opened my mouth and gotten me into trouble. One week away from Maria and the conditioning she had forced upon me was beginning to dissolve. I assumed it was a good step from that perspective, but pissing off Edward was not a brilliant idea. Why couldn't I just keep my mouth shut?

A light wind swept through the hammock, warning me of a stronger cold front on the way. I did not care how cold the weather was, but I missed staring at the stars. As the sun dipped below the horizon I glared at the darkening sky, silently cursing the constant cloud cover.

Annoyance at unchangeable events was always preferable to the apathy which had plagued me earlier. I waited with dread for the visitor who was supposedly on her way. I hated that dread was the only way to describe my own emotions; I should have been hopeful and excited. Why wasn't I?

I hoped that it was the fear of change which was holding me back. I had lived in the same misery for seventy years and my entire existence had been turned upside-down in the previous week. I could not fault my need for something to remain the same, even if the timing was seriously crappy.

Maybe Tanya had changed her mind again. She had been keeping Alice guessing by not making any decisions about visiting. As frustrated as Alice was about the situation, it was probably best that Tanya and I meet to work out where we stood with each other without forewarning from Alice.

My image of Tanya was so incomplete it was pointless trying to envision meeting her. She was blonde and tall for a woman but that was all I knew. Was her smile welcoming or calculating? I always appreciated the smile of a woman, even if it was rarely bestowed on me. The brush of happiness to an Empath is akin to a welcome touch to a friendly cat.

I could not hide my real concern; that initial moment of sharp fear that no Vampire had ever been able to repress. Deep within my soul I believed that my mate would not feel that instinctive terror, yet even these peace-loving 'vegetarians' who had spent decades with Jasper had all reacted the same way.

I wanted to remember my human life. Had I always been such a pessimist? I had died a bachelor, so maybe I was just useless when it came to wooing a woman.

The wind strengthened to a dull roar and my shirt flapped around my torso like a flag. I really hoped Emmett's plans for a tree-house included insulation and a television.

I breathed in the cold air and analysed the scent of animals, vegetation and pollution without interest. It was at least an hour before the slightest tang of another scent registered in my mind.

All of the Cullen Vampires were familiar to me, but this one was not. I peered over the edge of my hammock, waiting for the first glimpse of Tanya.

Her footsteps were light but clearly audible. I was sure she was clever enough to avoid surprising me. Even if she knew I was expecting her to visit, it was never wise to approach an unfamiliar Vampire without serious caution.

The glimpse of blonde hair sent a wave of anxiety through me. What if she actually was my mate? Was I ready for that?

She moved slowly, glancing around curiously. I took a few moments to watch her without being observed in return.

She was undeniably gorgeous. Her hair was long and golden, as promised. I had not expected such a confident bearing from her; somehow I expected she would be as nervous as I was.

I wanted to see a link of orange joining us together but the air between us remained clear. I clung to the hope that the ties of a mated pair developed over time rather than instantly.

Her nose was small, which contrasted nicely with her large eyes. Even as a human, she must have been stunning to look at.

I could only imagine how unattractive I would look to her.

With that thought in mind I left the hammock for the tree and jumped down to the spot which would hide me from her sight for an extra moment.

"Jackson?" she called hesitantly; even her voice was beautiful. The sound lingered in my ears as I gathered my courage. Facing an army of vicious newborns had never been so daunting.

"Hello Tanya," I said as I stepped into view. I remained still so she could clearly see the scars; especially the one which dominated half of my face. Her eyes travelled from my ear, across my cheekbone and down to the corner of my mouth as she studied it.

The fear flashed into her aura and froze her in place. A human would not have noticed it but to a Vampire it was very clear that I terrified her. A growl of warning built up in her chest.

I took a step backward, "I'm sorry ma'am," I sighed. "I promise I am no threat to you."

Tanya blinked and her hand flew up to cover her mouth. I did not need to be an Empath to know she was embarrassed.

"I'm sorry Jackson," she apologized as the fear faded away to be replaced by concern, "I didn't mean to react like that."

I nodded, though it still stung. I had expected her fear and the hope that she would surprise me died a slow death.

"All Vampires react with fear," I said softly, "Considering my past, I deserve every moment of it."

She was still concerned, which I found odd. Was she concerned about her own safety or me?

"One minute," Tanya said. She pulled out a mobile phone and dialled a number. I watched her with curiosity.

"_Hello_," a male voice answered.

"Hi Jacob, Tanya here. I love that Alice can't see what's happening just because I'm talking to you."

"_You're welcome, can I go back to sleep now? It's like midnight_."

"Sleep well Wolfy Boy," Tanya laughed.

He said something impolite before the call ended. She was not at all insulted; instead she seemed rather pleased with herself.

"As much as I love Alice, there are some things which need to be private," Tanya said to me softly.

Alice's constant predictions were mildly irritating after only a week; after years I'd be seeking ways to hide from her visions too.

"Everyone has tried to explain how beautiful you are," I said to Tanya, "Yet they all failed to do you justice."

Tanya smiled at me, no doubt accustomed to compliments from awkward Vampires struck by her looks. She walked forward slowly, clearly giving me the opportunity to back away if I wanted to.

"You are definitely a charmer; Carlisle didn't mention that."

"What did he mention?"

Tanya held her hand out for me to take. I was not sure I was ready for physical contact but I reached for her anyway in an attempt to be polite.

At the last moment I withdrew my hand and whispered an apology. Pity swirled around her, which was worse than fear.

I walked next to her, annoyed at myself for shunning her hand.

"Carlisle mentioned that you were genetically related to Jasper and had been turned by the same Vampire in the south. He also said that you were more relaxed than Jasper had been because you didn't have to worry about protecting a mate. After a week you're more comfortable than Jasper was after a year apparently."

It was all true though I was not sure how I felt about Tanya being prepped to meet me.

"It's rare for Carlisle to express pride in a new family member so quickly,"

Tanya added, "He already sees you as a son."

"Carlisle is a remarkable man," I said softly.

"He is," Tanya agreed, "But he can also be a pain in the backside."

I chuckled at the description and Tanya clearly read the confusion in my face.

"It's because he's too perfect, you know?" she clarified, "No matter how 'good' you are or how many years you manage to avoid killing humans you will never live up to him. He doesn't compare you against his own life but in your own head you lose every time."

"When did you change your diet?" I asked, hoping it wasn't a rude question.

"Well basically I wanted to be able to spend a night with a human male without killing him. It wasn't a 'human life is sacred' thing because that seems terribly arrogant. Some of the men were really nice and didn't deserve to die. It took a couple of centuries to perfect, and I found that unless I swore off hunting humans completely I kept having accidents."

"Do the accidents still happen?" I wondered.

"In the last three centuries, four times. I do kill humans on occasion without drinking, but only if they try to rape or beat me," she added, "Those ones deserve it."

I silently agreed with her, "Is it hard to refrain from biting those ones?"

She shrugged, "Sometimes, but I wouldn't want to pollute myself with anything of theirs."

I liked her as a person but I was still convinced that we were not meant to be more than friends. I had no idea how to explain that without offending her.

"What was Jasper like when he first arrived?"

Tanya laughed, "The same as he is now; quiet, watchful and obsessed with Alice. I'm not sure I have heard him say more than a couple of sentences in over fifty years. I wondered if it was the Empath thing but you seem more than capable of holding up a conversation."

I smiled a little at the compliment. I didn't receive them often enough to know what else to do.

"I talk too much," I admitted, "I learned to shut-up in the South but my internal monologue never stopped. Now that there is a telepath around I am just blurting things out again."

Tanya giggled, "I like it. Even if we're not meant to be mates I am sure we are going to be good friends."

"Tanya, when I got here I realized that I can see the bond between mates," I began softly. She regarded me with clear hope.

"I'm not sure if it is a connection which flares up immediately or if it grows over time but if I see it between us, or between you and another I will recognise it and tell you right away."

She covered her mouth with her hand again. If she had been able to cry her eyes would have been filled with tears.

"You are a godsend," she said, her voice trembling with emotion, "I knew you were going to help me!" She lunged forward to hug me, which only made me stumble back in shock.

Tanya smiled at me but persisted at a slower pace once I had stopped moving. She hugged me briefly while I remained frozen in place.

"My greatest fear," she said softly, "Is that I will meet or have met my mate and I won't know it. What if I missed the opportunity to find him a thousand years ago? I mean Rosalie knew right away but Carlisle was clueless for ten years! Edward was almost as dense but he figured it out eventually. If it's not an immediate thing how will I know? I can't assume it's just the males who are too dim to recognise a mate, I can't risk becoming complacent."

I searched her aura, glad to have something else to focus on.

"I can't see any of the Bond on you," I said firmly, "I doubt you have met your mate yet." I didn't admit that if the bond formed gradually she could very well have missed her opportunity to find him.

"I'm so glad you're here Jackson," she admitted with a grin, "Ten years without a single friend if way too long. While everyone else wanders away to get pelvic with their spouses we can plan epic practical jokes on them."


	15. Revelation

**Jackson**

Carlisle was always on time for the three am appointment. I was still pondering Tanya's visit when his footsteps echoed through the forest. He was about as stealthy as a Labrador.

The second set of footsteps was softer and unexpected. I hoped it was one of the family members as I had met enough new Vampires for the time being; many more and I would encourage the Cullen family to open a Bed and Breakfast. The image of bottled bear blood and broken beds made me smile a little.

"How did you survive so long without getting your head ripped off?" Edward wondered aloud.

"Edward," Carlisle said disapprovingly.

"No telepaths down there," I replied, "If there had been I wouldn't have lasted a month."

Carlisle settled himself against a tree, probably ruining another set of clothes for Alice to replace. I suspected she was so keen on me learning to tolerate the smell of humans just so she could drag me around a shopping centre.

Edward smiled, "That may have crossed her mind."

"So how did Tanya's visit go this evening?" Carlisle asked.

"Fine I guess," I wasn't sure why Edward was here all of a sudden; had I done something wrong?

"Alice suggested I be here tonight," Edward explained as he also sat down on the wet ground, "She said you were struggling to explain something that really needed to be seen. She promised she doesn't know what you were talking about in the vision, but that it was about Maria."

Maria. If I never heard that name again it would still be too soon. Even if my control was perfect one day I suspected women with dark hair named Maria would still be on the menu.

Edward looked away, tactfully examining the bark of one of the trees. Carlisle watched me patiently. I wondered if he practised that calm expression in the mirror.

"Was there anything about Tanya's visit that worried you or reminded you of your past?" Carlisle asked.

At the time I hadn't thought so, but the odd feeling of relief when I had realized that Tanya was not my mate bothered me. I should have been disappointed.

Edward was watching me again. I knew which memory I wanted to repress and because of that it played before my eyes before I could try to derail it.

_I had been a Vampire for about eight months. Maria had always watched me closely, which had drawn jealousy from the other newborns. Three of them attacked me at once; I had destroyed them but my arm had nearly been severed. Maria had simply surveyed the carnage and then lit the fire to burn the pieces. I had sucked the venom out of the bite marks I could reach and spat the offending substance onto the floor._

_"I will clean the one on your back," Maria had cooed seductively._

_She was beautiful and powerful. I allowed her to lead me into a private room which even contained a bed._

_She stripped my clothes off without a word. I was scared of her and yet completely aroused at the same time; it was a combination I would grow to loathe._

_She made me sit on the edge of the bed so she could kneel behind me and reach the bite mark on my shoulder. She was quick and efficient but I did not like the spike of pleasure which I could sense from her when I gasped in pain._

_She stood in front of me when the bite was clear of venom; her eyes trailing over every part of my naked body. Only later would I realize who she was comparing me to in her mind._

_"I have need of a General," she said softly, "Someone who I can trust completely. I will offer seventy years of obedient service in exchange for your freedom. If you don't accept your fate will be the same as the other newborns."_

_I did not know what fate she had in store at the time but her cold demeanour and calculating eyes gave me enough hints. She was offering slavery or death._

_"What are your orders my lady?"_

_Satisfaction glowed around her along with lust and excitement. I thought that if I could keep her happy I would be safe._

_"I know of your gift," she said softly, "You are never to use it on me except when we are totally alone and our minds are on pleasure."_

_Damn, that plan was a bust._

_"In front of the rest of them you will be my second-in-command; demanding respect and my complete approval," her voice dropped dangerously, "But in private you are mine and you will do everything I demand."_

_What choice did I have? In my young mind I could not imagine the cruelty she would enjoy._

_"I swear my loyalty to you Maria," I replied, trying to sound confident._

_She smiled, and I repressed the impulse to cringe. Within a second she had pulled her underwear off and pounced on me._

_She gripped my erection painfully but the sensation was lost as she sank down onto it. I revelled in the pleasure of sex again and reached for her._

_She slapped me hard across the face and pinned my hands above me head. _

_"I did not tell you to touch me," she hissed. The grinding of our bodies washed away her harsh words. Eight months of celibacy, in addition to whatever I had missed out on at the end of my human years, made me desperate for her touch._

_She released my hands and made me sit up and lean on my arms. Her hands gripped my throat and her nails dug into my skin painfully._

_Her lust was building to a peak but so was mine. Her breasts were still covered by her dusty clothing but the sensations radiating out from my groin were too strong. For the first time since I was a teenager I failed to make sure my partner orgasmed before I did._

_Maria snarled down at me, "You're going to learn to be more patient," she growled, her fingers puncturing the soft skin of my throat, "Hold completely still or the punishment will be ten times worse."_

_Shame and fear held me motionless as she climbed off and kneeled in front of me. I was still hard thanks to Vampire endurance but clearly she had something else in mind._

_Her teeth ripped into my thigh, so close to my torso that I felt and heard her scrape bone. I gritted my teeth and groaned in pain as her venom began to spread, burning everything in its path._

_She stood up with a small smile and remounted me. Her weight on the bite mark was agony._

_"Not another sound," she threatened, "Or I'll bite the other leg too. Or maybe somewhere infinitely more sensitive right in the middle."_

_After that, it was never difficult to ensure she finished first. Usually, I didn't even finish at all._

I stared at the ground, not willing to see the pity in Edward's eyes. Seeing it wafting around him was bad enough.

I suddenly needed to leave, to be well out of earshot while the telepath described my humiliation to the new Coven leader. As I bolted deeper into the forest it did not escape my notice that for the moment he was not 'Carlisle' but a 'Coven Leader'. The details of my indignities could be revealed to one but not the other; a stupid distinction but one which I clung to.

I stopped at a bend in the creek bordered by a couple of sturdy rocks. I sat on one of them and hung my feet into the cold water. There was some slush floating around which I kicked with my feet for something to do.

The memory that Edward had seen was one of many. I wished my memory was as flawed as that of a human so I could let the painful images fade away into nothingness. Sleep would be nice to; I'd risk nightmares for the ability to switch off each night.

I was left to wallow in self-pity and anger for a couple of hours but before the others had to go to school I could feel the concern of another Vampire at the edge of my senses. I did not breathe to identify the interloper by scent or analyse their footsteps. I ignored her until she was standing right next to me.

Rosalie sat down next to me, pulled off her shoes and dipped her feet into the water next to mine.

"Did you pull the short straw?" I asked moodily. I had planned to remain silent but I realized that wouldn't last long.

"I volunteered," she replied.

"Why?"

She smiled sadly, "Because I'm a bitch."

I was tempted to chuckle but I opted for glancing at her questioningly.

"I am a bitch because that is how I cope. Everyone else can pretend life is wonderful but I know full well that life can be absolutely shit. I survive by letting by emotions out."

"What did they tell you?" That was my real fear. Had her perception of me changed because of what I had revealed?

"Nothing much; just that Maria is still the biggest bitch on the face of the Earth and you have more emotion scars than physical ones."

Maybe she didn't know. That was a relief.

"Jasper took decades to open up to me but once he did he felt better for it," she added.

I froze in place. She did know; perhaps she had known from the moment she had seen me.

Rosalie reached out to rest her hand on mine, "I think you deserve to know my story."

While she spoke her emotions were tightly repressed. Her voice remained even as though she was telling a distant story she had read somewhere.

I was left in complete awe of her strength.

"Some people think we're victims," she finished softly, "But we're not. We're survivors and that's what makes us different. We faced horrible circumstances and live to tell the tale; it leaves marks on our very souls."

She slipped an arm around my shoulder and tucked her head against my neck. The purr she offered me was exactly what I needed.

"You're amazing Rosalie," I whispered.

"Call me Rose."

"Don't call me Jack - I hate that nickname."

She chuckled, "It doesn't suit you anyway."

I didn't want to delve back into the past which still pained her but I had one final question which needed to be asked.

"Do the others know?" I asked.

"The brief two-sentence version," she clarified, "None of them know the details except Edward. I couldn't keep them from him."

I understood the anger in her tone.

"That's why he irritates you so much," I realized.

"He can never know," Rosalie continued, "It's not his fault that he could see every sneer and feel every touch. He carries enough guilt as it is; he is better off thinking that I am a shallow cow who avoids him because he didn't want me."

"Is it healthy to keep the real reason from him?" I asked.

She shrugged, "It's better for him and I seem to be able to cope. Even if I was to tell him; he has never experienced rape. How could he understand that the violation of my mind is nearly as bad as what those men did to me?"

"He couldn't."

"And since he had no intent to hurt me he does not deserve the pain or guilt. I killed the arseholes who raped me so the burden of never knowing if Edward is remembering me in that position is mine to bear."

"I'm glad you killed them," I admitted, "Even now I want to dig up their corpses and spit on them."

"I wish I could kill Maria for you, and for Jasper."

"How could anyone be fooled into thinking you are not as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside?" I wondered.

"Decades of convincing," she laughed, "My acting skills are almost perfect."

"I'm so glad you found Emmett," I said, "You deserve to be happy; I can tell that you don't hate being a Vampire as much as you claim."

"Shhh, keep that a secret or Edward will think I'm deeper than a puddle."

I decided to voice the fear that had been fermenting in my mind; "Rose, if single, female Vampires make me so nervous, my mate is probably going to be human when I find her."

"I know. When the time comes I will pretend to be seriously pissed off but you will be able to feel how happy I am for you. If she wants a baby we know that it is possible; you can give her everything she wants."

"I'd kill her," I said flatly. There was no way I had even a fraction of the self-control necessary.

"There are ways around that; humans invented artificial insemination decades ago," she smiled at me teasingly. I wasn't sure if her suggestion was serious or just an attempt to embarrass me.

"Like a horse," I mused, "How very romantic."

"Speaking of lack of romance, I have to go to school. Next time we move I will be enrolling in high school and you are going to be my big brother who enrols me there so you have work to do in the meantime."

"Me in a school even for a few minutes is a disaster waiting to happen," I pointed out.

"Right now it is, but in a few years it will happen."

"Go to school."


	16. Checking In

**Jackson**

I watched a delivery van pull up outside the house. The scent of the two humans was compelling but I was able to control myself this time.

Esme gave them instructions on where to place the enormous package. The grunted and strained to move it, even with the machinery they had to assist them. She waited until they had left before she picked it up on her own and carried it toward me.

"Is it a pony?" I asked sarcastically.

"Yes Jackson, it is a pony," she responded while rolling her eyes, "When you assemble it, it may resemble a large tree-house but really it is a pony."

I was pleasantly surprised by her humour, though decades of living with Emmett without killing him had no doubt developed the skill.

"A tree-house sounds even better," I replied, "I hope it comes with an in-built television."

She shook her head at my silly reply even while she smiled, "Emmett wants to help you put it together. Considering how inept he is at building anything I would suggest you work hard to have it well under way before he gets back from school."

I regarded the bulky package sceptically. How was a whole house, even a small one stuffed in there?

"Will you help me?" I asked quietly.

Esme beamed at me, confirming that it was the right decision. She explained that the house was actually a child's cubby house that would need to be altered for the purpose. Before I realized what she was planning Esme was fetching extra beams of wood from deep in the garage and sending me to scout for the strongest trees.

I watched Esme while she worked, interested in studying one more Vampire in the Cullen family. When she had a project to occupy her mind she was efficient and in charge. It was almost daunting compared to the gentle demeanour she usually maintained.

The base of the tree-house ended up being four metres off the ground. I would have preferred higher but the branches were not strong enough. Just to be safe Esme added support beams on each corner.

I didn't mind taking orders from Esme, while her voice remained gentle and her instructions precise. In hindsight, Maria liked to leave some leeway for interpretation in her orders in case she was in the mood to be annoyed at me later.

I completed the floor at Vampire speed while Esme changed the design of the walls to limit the damage to the trees. It was midday before a scent on the wind made me pause.

"More visitors," Esme noted calmly. She did not even pause in her work.

Was the Cullen family the most popular Vampire tourist attraction at this time of year? I dropped to the ground and faced the approaching Vampires, recognising them before they were in visual range.

Charlotte smiled at me immediately while Peter regarded me with a frown.

"Hello Jackson," Charlotte tipped her head back and waved, "Hi Esme!"

"Hello dear," Esme replied warmly, "We're in the middle of a project if you want to help?"

Charlotte used the nearest tree to gain altitude while her mate remained in place, still watching me.

"Hi Peter," I said softly.

Peter walked forward warily, "So you do speak," he remarked.

"Sometimes."

"Do you want to stay here?" Peter asked, "We were told to bring you here but you're free to go if you don't like it."

I realized that in his own gruff way Peter was worried about me.

"I like it here," I admitted, "Animal blood is gross but I can't handle the backlash when I kill a human."

Peter nodded, "It got pretty bad with Jasper. I didn't realize at the time but I think he was suicidal when he left me and Charlotte."

"Jasper has been a huge help; he understand much more than the others," I smiled a little, "Even Rosalie has been trying to be friendly."

Surprise rolled off him, "Hmm."

I refrained from emphasising how welcoming she had been; she liked her tough reputation so I was determined to protect it for her.

"Thank-you Peter, for helping me."

He shrugged, clearly uncomfortable. He had more in common with human males than he admitted.

"You're welcome."

"Do you want to help with the construction?"

Peter glanced up at Esme and Charlotte, "Not really. What are you making?"

I grinned, and Peter was clearly startled by it, "A tree-house. It was a joke really but Emmett insisted on ordering one. It turns out Jasper is having so much trouble with the diet because he is picking up the thirst of everyone in the family."

"Alice has designed their cabin already," Esme called down, "The supplies should arrive next week."

"You could start a chain of motels," Charlotte giggled, "Vampire Vacations; we take the bite out of holiday planning."

"I'm sure they would be very popular," Esme mused.

"Kind of like a roach motel," Peter added.

"What?" I asked.

"You know; checking in but never leaving."

"Jackson, I was worried you wouldn't fit in here," Charlotte said with a smile, "But you have adjusted remarkably well."

"I agree," Esme added as she continued hammering nails into what would be one of the walls, "We were worried at first but Jasper has been wonderful."

"He's like a translator," I added, "When I do something the Cullen's don't understand he steps in to explain; when I freak out the family he calms everyone down. Alice helps too but I swear she has more fun causing the weirdness."

Peter circled the platform that Esme and Charlotte were working on. I fetched materials and tools as they were needed.

"You know, when I first met this family I was sure there was something wrong with them," Peter said.

"We knew that," Esme laughed, "Alice thought it was hilarious. Emmett wanted to store bottles of animal blood in the fridge so he could put them in a beer hat when you visited."

"I could totally imagine that," Charlotte mused.

"Is this what you people do all day?" Peter wondered.

"Basically," Esme laughed, "Whatever we want to do; as long as it doesn't blow our cover or kill anyone."

Peter clearly thought the vegetarian lifestyle was boring. In many ways I was sure it would be very tedious eventually.

"Have you met Tanya yet?" Charlotte asked slyly.

"Yes, she dropped by yesterday," I replied softly, ignoring the emotions she was emitting.

Even Peter smiled at me a little, "How did the meeting go?"

Obviously he was asking about more than the conversation. Did they really expect Tanya and I to throw off our clothes and screw like rabbits?

"I don't think we're mates but she seems great. She was really relieved to know I can see the bond between mates so I can help her find the one she's looking for," I clarified.

Disappointment wafted off all three of them. I guess they did expect me to get naked and take the rabbit path.

I didn't want to add any details about the resulting conversation with Edward and Carlisle. I doubted I should share that I expected my mate to be human when I met her.

"Too bad," Peter added, "She's hot."

"She is beautiful," I agreed, "I like her sense of humour."

"I'm bored now," Charlotte announced. She left the hammer on the platform and jumped off. Peter caught her easily and grinned down at her adoringly.

An ache in my chest began to leech the happy emotions right out of the day. I tried to turn my attention back to the construction project.

Esme smiled at me knowingly. I was struck by the fear that Carlisle had told her exactly what had been revealed during the night hours. I had taken huge steps toward complete trust with the blonde Vampire but lingering doubts remained.

"You will find her one day," Esme whispered, just loudly enough for me to hear.

I nodded through my pessimism. Tanya continued to be patient and that had gotten her nowhere.

The skeleton of the walls and tilted roof were in place by the time the rumble of a distant engine reached my ears. Peter and Charlotte were brimming with anticipation, clearly waiting to see Jasper.

I sat cross-legged on the completed platform and watched Peter and Jasper greet each other. Their hug was shorter than I would have expected; clearly the 'human' tendencies had affected Jasper more than even he realised.

Charlotte kissed Jasper on the cheek but neither attempted to hug each other; the latent jealousy and protectiveness in Peter had clearly stopped such actions in the past.

Edward and Bella made small talk as long as was polite before they excused themselves to enter the house. I was not the only one who knew exactly what they were planning to do once they had some privacy.

I wondered why they would retreat to a flimsy bed when they could find a private part of the forest and knock some trees down. My curiosity fermented as it had since I had arrived; did Edward still treat Bella as a fragile human or did his behaviour drastically change once they were alone? I suspected the former.

Alice parked the car in the garage and emerged a few minutes later with her customary smile. She paused for a moment and her emotions vanished; she was experiencing a vision.

When Alice snapped back to reality she spun around to address one of the upstairs windows.

"Bella!" she yelled, "If you break that bed I'm ordering you two single ones to replace it!"

She did not wait for a reply. I could see the embarrassment glowing around the window. How had they endured ten years of teasing if it still had an effect?

"They need a cottage," Esme said, clearly speaking to herself, "I'll have to look into sound-proofing."

It was amusing that she was talking to herself like a human would. The Vampire brain could follow multiple lines of thought simultaneously; I had never heard another speak as Esme did.

Alice hugged Charlotte and Peter quickly before heading toward Esme and I. The calculating expression on her petite face matched the mischief in her aura.

"You stay back," I warned her as she reached the clearing below the platform, "You may look like a pixie but I know you're actually a goblin here to torture me. Stay back creature of chaos!"

Esme giggled but Alice was not impressed, "I saw a vision today," Alice said happily, "There were two delivery men here today and you made no move to attack."

I narrowed my eyes at her, "Maybe they were wearing too much cologne."

"Or maybe you and Jasper are having a very positive effect on each other," she replied.

"Sounds kinky," Peter joked. Charlotte giggled and Jasper rolled his eyes.

"We use our powers to induce revulsion in response to human blood," Jasper explained to his old comrades, "We have to be fast enough to get in before the bloodlust spreads though."

"Interesting but risky," Peter commented, "I doubt you get many human volunteers to test it on."

"I could write a newspaper ad," Jasper mused, "Human test subjects wanted; suicidal tendencies preferred."

Alice rolled her eyes, "I'll get right on that."

"Maybe it should be a family outing?" Esme suggested, "Like undead Santa Claus peeking in people's windows? The present is we're there to make sure no-one gets killed."

Charlotte giggled, "I swear, animal blood does something to the Vampire brain."

"You can be the Tooth Fairy Alice," Peter teased, "I could see you sneaking around with a pair of wings."

The faded memories of my family were being dredged up by the pointless conversation. Esme, Alice and Jasper were my immediate family while Peter and Charlotte were the cousins who we only saw at reunions or funerals.

I recalled that many of my family would get drunk and end up fighting while I was still alive.

Jasper was watching me curiously. I was sure he would be asking me about whichever interesting emotions I was producing. It was so easy to read the feelings of others, but my own were never as simple to interpret.


	17. Clue

**Jackson**

Peter and Charlotte wished us luck before they departed. I could sense the sadness in Jasper as they left.

Alice jumped onto his back with a grin. Jasper met my gaze with a smile, not even reacting to the weight on his back.

"You really want one of these?" Jasper asked, "A mate can be a huge pain in the butt; constantly nagging you to change your clothes and wipe the mud out of your hair."

"Maybe you're right," I mused, "I do hate new clothes. Alice, maybe I could just give you permission to choose my wardrobe so I don't have to worry about it?"

There was a dangerous gleam in her eyes; even Jasper appeared apprehensive.

"Are you sure about that Jackson?" Esme asked as she headed back into the house, "Edward let her do that for a decade before he couldn't stand it anymore."

Alice pouted, "It's not my fault he looked too good; or that he could hear the thoughts of all the students who were obsessing about him."

"He could have ignored the girls," Jasper added, "But the male students who were attracted to him made him really uncomfortable."

"Understandably," it was not a situation I ever wanted to be caught in, "But I'm not going to school so I think I'll manage."

"Esme can Jasper and I PLEASE have the first cottage?" Alice begged, "Jackson can have our room and I can make sure the clothes are all ready for him. Oh! There is a new place about an hour away that - "

"Yes Alice," Esme interrupted, "You can have the first cottage but only if you don't badger Jackson to accompany you shopping until he is ready."

"I promise!" Alice planted a kiss on Jasper's neck, jumped onto the ground and dragged him toward the front door. She was still twittering about some shopping complex even though Jasper was clearly trying to ignore her.

"Jackson, come on! You have to see our room since it's going to be yours in a couple of weeks! You might want to repaint it or - "

Jasper silenced her with a kiss.

"Alice, have you looked into a career in fashion design?" I asked curiously, "you could be the reclusive owner of a clothing line instead of perpetually playing a teenager."

Alice froze in place, clearly experiencing another vision. When her focus returned she grinned at me.

"Oh, that's going to be so cool!"

Edward and Bella trotted down the stairs, much to my relief. There was no way I was entering the house while they were upstairs spreading lust and whatever else. I suspected Bella was shielding her mate as he was too relaxed to be hearing my thoughts.

"What's going to be cool Alice?" Bella asked curiously.

"Next time we move, we're going to look into careers rather than high school. Edward, have you ever considered being a lawyer? Rosalie is going to be a Mechanic; it's too bad because she would be the perfect model for my designs."

Alice turned to face Jasper. Alarm clouded around him.

"Don't even think about trying to get me to be a model. Hell no," he said flatly.

Alice sighed, "Edward is going to study law just to get out of it too."

"Ask Emmett," Edward suggested. He headed toward me as I was standing in the front yard.

"He'd have too much fun doing that," Bella pointed out, "I could see him as a Park Ranger."

"Maybe you should be the lawyer," I said to Bella, "Edward can work for you and ferret out all the lies being told before you get started."

"Nope, Bella is going to be my best model," Alice announced.

Bella laughed, "Pull the other one Alice; I'd rather join the Volturi."

Alice frowned, "It was worth a try. Esme, will you be a model for me?"

"Only in the design stage," Esme called from inside the house.

"Maybe Tanya would help?" I suggested, "Assuming we live close enough."

Bella turned her attention to me with a smile, "Speaking of Tanya, how did your meeting with her go?"

I shrugged, "She seems nice. I don't think she is my mate but the chances of that were quite small."

"He is happier about meeting her than he claims," Jasper added cheekily.

Alice giggled, "He's glad to have someone else around who is single, so there is someone to talk to when the rest of us are getting - "

"We get the idea Alice," Edward interrupted.

"You know better than anyone about that Edward," Alice retorted, "Maybe you should spend an hour each night talking to Jackson."

Edward glanced at Bella, clearly occupied with other ideas.

"No thanks," I replied, "Not while you are drowning in that much lust."

Both Bella and Edward were embarrassed. I found it interesting. They excused themselves again and headed toward the forest. I hoped they were not planning to do anything on my platform.

"Why are they so shy?" I asked as I hesitated at the threshold of the front door. I really didn't like being indoors.

"Come on in Jackson," Alice teased, "You're like a feral cat scared of getting trapped. Seriously, even if we wanted to, we couldn't force you to stay in here."

"Edward is just old-fashioned," Jasper replied to my original question as I took a small step into the house.

"Bella seems just as uneasy," I noted, "Do all newly mated couples act like that?"

"Gosh no," Alice laughed, "Rosalie and Emmett were terrible; I don't think there was a single surface in the house they hadn't desecrated. Thank-goodness we move houses every decade or so."

"Esme and Carlisle were more discrete apparently," Jasper added, "And we tried to be out of respect for Edward. I think it's different with every couple. Most other couples try to go somewhere for a long stretch of time alone."

"I understand their daughter keeps them here for half the year, but why don't they take off together for the other six months?" I asked.

Alice and Jasper shared a glance of understanding; there clearly was a reason why Edward and Bella did not leave for much needed privacy.

"I'd like to hear your theory on them," Alice invited.

Based on Edward's reaction when Bella had taken a single step in my direction I did have an idea, "He hasn't accepted that she is immortal?" I guessed, "He must have been seriously over-protective to keep her alive as long enough to marry and have a child with her; I doubt he has gotten over that."

"Bingo," Jasper laughed.

"Has anyone spoken to them about that?" I asked.

Alice rolled her eyes, "Edward is the most stubborn Vampire on the face of the Earth."

"No-one can 'speak' to Edward about anything," Jasper explained, "Being able to read everyone's thoughts makes him think that he knows everything."

"It doesn't seem fair to let them suffer," I said thoughtfully.

Alice shrugged, "Believe me, we've tried. Every scenario ended with an argument."

"Did you actually try to talk to either of them, or did you just trust the visions?" I wondered aloud.

Alice narrowed her eyes at me, "What are you planning?"

"Nothing; which makes the outcome totally unpredictable."

"Whatever," Alice said dismissively, "Come see the room or I will paint it bright pink just to annoy you."

The house was nice, as far as I could tell. I had lived in run-down shacks and houses littered with corpses so sturdy walls and no gross smells was a nice change.

Alice waited at the top of the stairs, her eyes never leaving me. She smiled encouragingly as I took a careful step into the house.

The last time I had made such a journey I had a clear purpose; protect Esme. Entering for the second time seemed much more intimidating. I hated living from one moment to the next without knowing what I was expected to say and do.

"You've taken many big steps in just over a week," Alice intoned in a serious voice, "This one is tiny in comparison."

She disappeared down the hallway, leaving me alone. She was right; following her into the house was a small challenge compared to what I had faced in the past.

There was a creak in one of the steps and I could see some dents in the banister which looked suspiciously like finger indentations. I reached the place where Alice had vanished from my sight within a second.

The nearest bedroom had the door open, and I recognised Rosalie's scent a moment before Emmett's. No force on the planet could convince me to go in there.

Esme smiled at me from the next bedroom. She appeared to be in the process of making the bed.

Alice grinned at me from the next doorway. She held out her hand and I slowly extended mine toward her.

She gripped my fingers tightly and pulled me into the room.

"She got me that way too," Jasper pointed out, "Holding out her hand so innocently. She's very devious."

Jasper was sprawled on the bed, lounging comfortably as though expecting to fall asleep at any minute. He had his legs crossed at the ankles and the pillows propped up behind his head. There was a book next to him.

"It's so much fun going to school," Alice said, "I get to choose outfits for everyone." She dropped my hand once I was completely inside the room.

"Very fun," Jasper drawled, "I love reading boring books for English and pretending to be inept at sports. It's not hideously repetitive at all."

"Jasper has trouble with the emotions too," Alice added.

"Teenage girls are bad enough," Jasper huffed, "Drooling over Edward, insanely jealous of Rosalie and mood changes every few seconds but the boys! Each one walks around in a cloud of sexual frustration so thick I want to kill them just to make it stop. Then they turn their eyes on Alice."

I smiled at the image of the Major, the legendary killer of the Southern Wars having to tolerate teenage humans lusting after his mate.

"Why bother?" I asked.

"It helps to keep our tolerance of human smells at a peak level," Alice explained.

Jasper's reply was short; "Alice enjoys it."

That was the real reason; she liked it and he would do anything to make her happy. It was sweet and pathetic at the same time.

"I'm glad I will never have to attend," I said honestly.

"I've already organised some distance education stuff for you," Alice announced, "It will only take you a few months to finish high school and then you can begin college."

"Why would I want to do that?" It sounded like one of the levels of Hell I had feared as a child.

"Education is its own reward," Alice chirped happily as she pulled out clothes and held them up against me.

"Knowledge is power," Jasper added, "Even if you have to wade through lots of crap to get to it."

"You're going to love Astronomy," Alice continued, holding up more items of clothing against me before putting some away and others in a pile on the bed.

"Have you seen anything else interesting in my future?" I asked, "Like a new car, a mate or a lottery win?"

Jasper smirked, clearly knowing I had no interest in a car or money.

"Now that I am sure Tanya is not your mate I have been looking," Alice admitted. Another shirt was thrown onto the bed.

"What have you seen?"

Jasper watched me with amusement.

"You look great in blue," Alice said firmly, "Totally clear. Green too."

"Alice; what have you seen about my mate?" She was clearly enjoying torturing me.

"You are never allowed to wear yellow," she replied, "Like my Jazz, it makes your hair look crap."

I was half a second away from throttling the annoying midget for information when Jasper appeared right in front of my face. The trust we had in each other was quite obvious; neither of us was growling.

Alice giggled, "Jackson, I can't see much except that she will be human. Now go for a run with Jazz so he doesn't sit here complaining about which of his shirts you get."

"Alice, do not throw out my hat or boots," Jasper instructed firmly.

"Jazz..." she whined, drawing the syllables out in an annoying high-pitched whine.

Jasper stood in the doorway and glared at her with dark eyes.

Alice huffed, "Fine."


	18. Trust

**Jackson**

Routine. I needed a regular schedule of activities to take comfort in each day. The daily meeting with Carlisle was a good start but I knew the rest of the day was going to drag by if I didn't have a purpose.

Jasper led the way and I fell into step beside him. Though I respected Carlisle for his compassion, it was Jasper who I looked to as a leader. I would try to hide the distinction but if the family was ever caught in a situation which demanded violence I knew that the Major would swiftly reappear.

Jasper stopped abruptly, as did I. The trail Edward and Bella had followed was clear and I did not want to be anywhere near them.

"Ew," Jasper grunted, "We're heading this way."

He raced away in a new direction which was free of fresh Vampire trails. Annoyance washed over him in waves. My instinct to keep my mouth shut had dimmed but the fierce pattern of his scars had brought it back. I gathered my courage and forced myself to ask.

"Why are you annoyed?"

We changed direction again, and then took to the trees. It was a familiar game to hide out trails and evade any Vampire who tried to follow.

Jasper paused while clinging to a particularly wide tree with deep brown bark. He regarded me with a stern expression which worried me. If he demanded I submit I would fight him.

"Edward was such a pain in the arse for decades; now he has a mate and he is still being a pain!" Jasper growled, staring off into the distance, "Bella is strong, fierce and vicious but he can only see the breakable human she once was. Even worse they have spent the last ten years humping like rabbits!"

"The Cullen's are not normal."

Jasper' head snapped to stare at me, "Exactly; they are not bloody normal and I am sick of suffering because of it."

If we had been in the South I would have offered my assistance whether I was needed for manipulation or violence. In this new situation I was rather lost.

"I want to offer to help but I don't know if that's appropriate," I admitted.

Jasper snorted, "I do not expect submission form you Jackson; please consider yourself an equal. Thank-you for offering but I don't think there is anything we can do."

"Until she gets pissed off at him and rips his arm off," I said.

Jasper smiled, "You know, Alice did see that happening once. Bella loves Edward enough to pull him into line but I don't know if she is capable of that."

"Bella is interesting," I said thoughtfully, "I want to spend hours talking to her but I am sure Edward will resort to violence if he ever finds me alone with her."

Jasper shrugged, "You can take him; especially if Bella shields him."

His approval meant quite a lot to me; more than even Carlisle's. They would always judge me by their human standards; which I was still struggling to understand. Jasper was measuring me by expectations I was already familiar with.

"I still find it strange that you do not lead this coven-family," I said quietly.

Jasper laughed, "I could lead a Coven but I know nothing about being the head of a family. It is an important distinction."

Once again I had a glimpse of just how much I needed to learn about this family. For the first time in my existence I wanted to fit in but I had no idea how.

"Jasper, can we run off like this every day?" I asked, "I feel like an idiot asking so many stupid questions in front of the others."

"Are you sure?" he asked with a smirk, "I like not being the only one who points out how weird we can be. I swear I spent the first five years here trying to figure out what the hell was going on."

"Only five years?"

********************************************************************************************The fact that Jasper pounced on a deer in front of me inspired more hope than any words ever could have. He trusted me completely.

I waited until he had finished swearing about the bloodstain down his shirt.

"How did I earn your trust?" I asked directly, "The others..."

The rest of the family still felt the spike of fear when they first spotted me and the tendrils of mistrust were hard to miss. I doubted any of them realized that I could see such small emotions mixed in with the growing affection.

"I can see the huge changes you have embraced already," Jasper explained easily, "I know exactly what thoughts are going through your head and what you are choosing not to do. Damn, sometimes I look at you and I could swear I was seeing my past; especially when you're surprised by something they do."

The instinctive violent thoughts which appeared in my mind each time I was startled were not fading, but it was becoming easier to stop myself from acting on them.

"Edward knows how dangerous I am," I said sadly, "He will never trust me."

Jasper pitied me but there was a hefty dose of understanding there too.

"Does he trust you?" I asked.

Jasper shrugged, "Sometimes; but when Bella was human he didn't want me in the same state as her."

Though I understood why Edward was so over-protective at the time I understood how insulting that must have been for Jasper.

"The fear reaction when they look at the scars; does that ever go away?" I wondered.

Jasper shook his head, "Even now, they have that reaction if I catch them by surprise."

I wanted to ask about Alice; I wanted to know if she had felt that instinctive fear.

"I recognise that look," Jasper laughed, "It reminds me of Emmett when he is barred from asking Edward something deeply embarrassing."

I opened my mouth to ask, and then closed it again. Surely I would be rude to ask him something so personal?

The chime of a mobile phone made me frown. How had he not crushed it while hunting?

Jasper whipped out the phone to read the text message. He smiled at the screen before he tucked it away again.

"Apparently you want to know, in explicit detail, about the first time I met Alice?"

I nodded. Having Alice tell him what I struggled to ask was annoying and yet incredibly convenient.

"The fear," I clarified, "Did she feel it?"

Jasper climbed up another tree and found a comfortable perch on a sturdy branch. He made a short hand signal which invited me to follow. I briefly wondered if any of the others would understand it.

When I had chosen a branch and stopped moving Jasper peeled off a piece of bark and examined it closely.

"I had left the South and spent a few years with Peter and Charlotte before the depression drove me away. They wanted to help but there was nothing they could do to help. I was suicidal and utterly lost when I walked into a diner and a tiny Vampire brimming with happiness and love grinned at me."

I could imagine the scene and felt myself smiling.

"There was no fear at all, until we were heading to the forest together. I admitted to myself that she was far too good for me and I considered leaving her. She threw herself into my arms and begged me to stay forever."

"She had seen you coming, and knew that you were meant to be," I mused, "I doubt I will be so lucky; especially as I will be looking for a human."

"I trusted Alice from the first moment because I had nothing to lose. If she had betrayed me and killed me I would not have cared. Edward lived for months in absolute dread that something would happen to kill his mate; and it very nearly happened more than once," Jasper met my gaze and the piece of bark fell to the ground in tiny pieces, "You are going to have to speak to Edward about how to cope; and talk to Bella of course to understand how your mate is going to react."

That was not a happy prospect; I was sure I had annoyed Edward already. How could I earn his trust enough to get him to open up to me? I doubted it was possible.

"There has to be more to Edward than meets the eye I assume? Like Rosalie."

Jasper watched me through narrowed eyes, "What do you know about Rosalie?"

I narrowed my eyes back at him, "What do you know?"

He leaned back against the branch, clearly not intimidated, "She has told me everything."

"She's the opposite of the cow who sired us; that's what I like about her."

"I agree, but explain it anyway so I can figure out how much you know," Jasper invited.

"Maria was all smiles on the outside but a stone-cold selfish bitch underneath it," I began, noting the discomfort from both of us at the mention of her name, "But Rosalie keeps the hard bitchy shell to protect the warm person she is on the inside."

Jasper nodded, still wary of what I had been told, "What did she tell you about the night she was turned?"

The anger which surged through me made him flinch, "I would suffer another century with Maria if I could go back in time and rip them to shreds before they touched her," I said coldly.

"And yet, if it had not been for them she would never have been turned, and neither would Emmett. She hates that paradox because she adores Emmett."

"She also told me about Edward seeing the images in her mind and in the minds of the men she hunted down and killed; and how dirty that makes her feel," I added quietly.

"I wish I could delete those memories from her mind and his," Jasper sighed, "Their relationship could actually develop properly then."

"I doubt he would grasp the full impact anyway," I mused, "He has spent too long thinking with his brain rather than his heart."

"Therein lies our dilemma," Jasper said, "We can understand but we are not allowed to explain. Edward cannot understand but he might hear. Carlisle would try to understand but Rosalie won't talk to him about it."

"What about Alice?" Surely her visions would have covered a conversation where Rosalie shared her thoughts with me or with Jasper?

"She tries to give Rosalie her privacy, as the intrusion from a female is less offensive but still unwelcomed," Jasper admitted, "I am not sure exactly what she knows."

"Probably everything. What's the best way to make sure Edward doesn't find out what Rosalie told me?" Avoiding the telepath had worked so far but it was a short-term strategy at best.

"A song or poem can work. I like the Horrible Histories songs myself," Jasper glanced at the ground, clearly considering leaving the tree, "Picturing Alice naked won't work for you."

Alice was beautiful but I could not imagine her as anything other than a sister.

"No offence to your woman, but she is not my type," I said.

Jasper was amused, "Have you actually figured out your type? I had no idea until I walked into that diner. Edward was clueless until Alice pointed out that he was in love with Bella."

"I find it scary that a Vampire could be so clueless," I said as Jasper launched himself out of the tree, "Was Carlisle clueless for ten years or just miserable?"

Jasper shrugged, "I think Edward gets the martyr complex from Carlisle. Knowing him, he recognised Esme as his mate and tortured himself for the decade. Edward probably thought he was supposed to do the same."

It was unfathomable. We were creatures of instinct. How could either of them live for more than a few hours after denying that urge to claim their mate? I had only been told of the concept eight days ago and I was already obsessed with it.

"Surely you have realized that Carlisle is not at all normal?" Jasper asked as we headed further into the forest, "It's an impossible standard to aim for but as long as we are trying, we are accepted."

"Is it easier after all this time?"

Jasper nodded, "It is still just as tempting, but I am better at distracting myself. Alice is good at that too."

I hissed at him to shut up. He grinned back before leading the way toward the closest herd of deer.


	19. Bella

**Jackson**

By the time Jasper and I returned to the house I was feeling better. He had chosen six in the evening to be the arranged time for our daily run. He understood my need for order even if I couldn't put it into words.

Jasper disappeared into the house through the window of the bedroom which would be mine next week. I heard Alice laugh and announce that he looked and smelled like a wet cat. Once he offered to perform a strip tease for her I ran for the platform in the forest.

The wind was moving with me, which prevented me from smelling anything up ahead. The sight of a Vampire sitting cross-legged on my platform actually surprised me.

"Hi Jackson," Bella said with a smile. Clearly she was tactful enough not to react to the way I stared at her in surprise and trepidation.

I expected Edward to come barrelling out of the forest to chase me away from his mate. I even glanced around for him.

"What are you looking for?" Bella asked, genuinely curious.

"Edward. I didn't think the invisible chord between the two of you would stretch very far."

She smiled a little even as she rolled her eyes, "I know he is a bit over-protective but it's a hard habit to break."

I wasn't convinced. She patted the wood next to her to invite me up to sit with her. I was sure that if I sat too close Edward would drop out of the tree and try to rip my head off. I'd probably have to mess up his hair while I fought him off.

I sat in the furthest corner of the platform from Bella while I focused on the orange tie which stretched out from her torso. Edward was still in the house.

"When it comes to you his emotions are erratic," I said quietly, "More than any of the other males protecting their mates; he fears I am going to hurt you."

Bella frowned, "I'll have to have a talk with him."

I shrugged, "Considering what I had done in the past and the thoughts which go through my mind I do not blame him for mistrusting me."

Bella shifted to stretch her legs out. I reminded myself that playing human was important to blending in and not a waste of time as it appeared.

"I was human when I died in childbirth," Bella revealed, "My memories are hazy but his will be sharp forever. He massaged my heart to make the venom spread."

I watched her as I imagined waiting nearly ninety years for my mate, only to have her fall pregnant with my child and die as a result. He was probably going to be traumatised forever.

"I'll overlook his spikes of terror when I come within a few metres of you then," I offered.

She rolled her eyes, "Thanks."

The silence stretched between us. I had about a thousand questions I wanted to ask her but all of them were too personal for the limited knowledge we had of each other.

"Alice said you wanted to speak to me?" Bella inquired. She wasn't nervous at all, just curious.

I briefly planned to throw Alice off a cliff, knowing she would see my intention.

"Alice said something today which, well - " I sighed, hating that I was stumbling over my words.

Bella waited patiently. After living with Edward for a decade her patience was probably a well-developed entity.

"My mate is going to be human," I said, "Not dying as far as she can tell; human and healthy."

Bella understood completely. She nodded thoughtfully while she stared past me. The various emotions growing and then subsiding led me to suspect she was dwelling on memories.

"And no-one knows how she will react but I may be able to provide an insight," Bella said quietly.

"I fear I will lose control and kill her, no matter how hard I work to improve my tolerance," I admitted sadly.

Bella shifted again to tuck her legs underneath her body, "Well the chances that she will be your Singer are extremely small; so you have a good chance at being able to control the thirst if you remain well-fed."

"When you first saw Edward, did he scare you?" I was still waiting for the overprotective telepath to explode from the house.

Bella rested her teeth on her lower lip, "I remember being interested and drawn to him but I was never scared of him. I feared the family would get hurt defending me."

I nodded, "Every Vampire and human I have encountered fears me," I said honestly, "Even if it only lasts a second; it's always there."

**Bella**

Jackson reminded me so strongly of Jasper that he made my dead heart ache. Like Edward, the two Empaths judged themselves by standards which would have gotten them killed in the South. I knew Edward would never let go of his assertion that Jasper and Jackson were two of the most dangerous creatures on the planet.

Yet Edward still insisted that he was a soulless monster when he was in a sour mood. I had multiple strategies at my fingertips to knock sense into his head but I feared his self-esteem would never rise to an acceptable level. Clearly Jackson suffered from the same misconception.

The scars Jackson wore triggered an instinctual terror that all Vampires would recognise. It made perfect sense to me that his mate had to be human; she would have the opportunity to see him before the marks of his violent past were visible.

Jackson stared off into the darkness with his trademark blank expression. Like Jasper he had been trained to suppress any sign of weakness. I did not envy Alice or Jackson's future mate the monumental task of penetrating those defensive shells.

Jackson was handsome, as all Vampires were. The scars ensured that he appeared dangerous rather than pretty which I knew Edward secretly envied. My mate had been asked if he was attracted to men by other Vampires often enough that he would have enjoyed the ability to intimidate them without a word.

Jackson always stood or sat with his back straight and his shoulders back; a remnant from his military past I assumed. His bearing resulted in an image of confidence that supported his scars. Upon first meeting the instinctive reaction was to assume he was incredibly dangerous and confident in his ability to defeat any opponent.

Yet I had lived with Edward and Jasper long enough to know how deep their insecurities ran. More than once Alice had confided that Jasper would never deem himself good enough for her within the next century.

I was not sure there was anything I could say which would reassure Jackson that his mate would accept him because of all his flaws rather than in spite of them. I wondered if the self-doubt was a universal male trait or just confined to Vampires.

"Edward underestimated my attachment to him," I said carefully, "He thought he could remove himself from my life and I would be able to marry a human and live a regular human lifespan happily."

Jackson nodded, "An easy mistake to make. Considering how life-altering the mate bond appears between each of the couples here, it is scary to imagine such feelings being experienced by a human."

"The longing to be with him looked to outsiders like a teenage crush but it was a fully-fledge mating bond of a Vampire," I admitted, "It nearly destroyed me when he left."

"If I make any assumptions which are clearly incorrect you have my complete permission to point them out," Jackson offered, "I'm not sure how I will react but if anyone can get through it will be you."

"We were all human at one time," I said.

Jackson showed no emotion which only made me curious, "Edward is very stubborn," he said slowly, "I admire your ability to lead him back to logic."

"You have more in common with him that you will ever admit," I mused, "The initial urge to intimidate people out of your personal space is also shared with Jasper."

Jackson tilted his head, "I had to be intimidating in the South; I didn't realize I was actively pushing anyone away."

I suppressed a smile, "The lack of expression on your face, your rigid bearing and your tendency to make prolonged eye contact are all a part of it, and I have noticed that tact is let's say, a developing ability?"

Jackson smiled and it was beautiful, "Now that I know that I am safe here the filter between my brain and mouth has lessened," he admitted, "I fear I have already offended Edward."

"My mate is smart enough to judge by actions rather than words or thoughts," I assured him gently, "Before you meet your mate he can teach you everything he knows about interacting with humans. Simple things like refraining your strength to be able to hold her hand will seem impossible at first."

"Thank-you Bella," he glanced toward the house. I did not need to turn around to know that Edward was approaching at a human pace.

"You're welcome, and do not hesitate to ask for our help."

I spun around and dived off the platform in one smooth motion, straight into Edward's arms.

"My hero," I sighed dramatically as Edward cradled me close to his chest.

"Exactly what would you do if I dropped you?" Edward asked with a sneaky grin.

I smiled back at him confidently, "I'd let Alice throw out all your clothes and drag you shopping."

"You are seriously evil."

Jackson had crept forward to watch us intently. There was no mistaking the envy in his eyes.

"We should spend time chatting more often Jackson," I said as Edward lowered my feet to the ground, "I'm sure Edward will be happy to help you too."

Jackson smiled a little at that, "I'm sure."

I led Edward deeper into the forest before an awkward silence could stretch between them. We were far from any eavesdroppers when I turned to pounce on him again. I wrapped my legs around his waist and he supported my weight by groping my butt.

His smile was a beautiful as ever and the memory of seeing him for the first time was particularly clear.

"Jackson is worried that you don't like him," I said softly. Edward was distracted by the way my cleavage was right at his eye level. I used one finger to tilt his chin up until he was meeting my eyes.

"I don't dislike him," Edward admitted with a frown.

"How long did it take you to accept Jasper as a brother rather than just Alice's mate?" I asked.

Edward sighed, "Close to a decade."

"Far too long; Jackson needs your help as soon as possible. For all you know he will meet his mate tomorrow."

"Alice says we have a few years at least," Edward admitted.

"Well, that is still not enough time," I decided, "What is holding you back?"

Edward allowed my body to slip back to the forest floor, "He doesn't think like the rest of us. His mind is always seeking a strategic advantage; he is waiting for one of us to attack him."

"Doesn't he trust us?" It had been less than two weeks but Jackson had made remarkable progress.

Edward shrugged, "Logically he knows he is safe but the instinct to expect an attack is ingrained in him."

I smiled, "So he does trust us. You can't expect him to push aside the instincts which kept him alive in that hell."

"He is dangerous," Edward said quietly, "And is scares me to know that he could hurt or kill you before I had the chance to intervene."

"Edward, I love you but you need to listen to me very carefully; Jackson is not the problem here. You are the one who needs to learn how to trust. After so long alone and private it is time to open up to him about every second of our courtship. He needs us."

"I know, and I want to help."

"Good. Now I am only a little peckish but I can come up with a few other things I would like to do while we're all alone out here."

Edward grinned. I would never tire of the desire in his eyes.


	20. Rough Day

**Jackson**

Like my fictional counterpart I was lying around like a corpse during the daylight hours, patiently waiting for dusk.

I was looking forward to going for a run with Jasper; I needed advice on how to tell Tanya that my destined mate was going to be human. She would probably accept he news without a qualm but if she was prone to dramatics I wanted to be forewarned.

I had left the Harry Potter books on the dining room table for Alice to find. They had been interesting but they had failed to generate any enthusiasm for schooling in general. Alice had assured me that I would enjoy completing my secondary education as I would only have to do it once in the upcoming decade.

I could not remember attending school as a human, though I knew I had been born in 1914. By the time of the 1929 Wall Street Crash I was probably already in the workforce or preparing to join the Army. I was not sure if military service had been my sole career or if I had joined up sometime during the Second World War. The information seemed irrelevant to my current position so I didn't bother asking if anyone could look it up.

I could hear the rumble of the car returning Edward, Bella, Alice and Jasper from school well before it appeared. I was curious about their experiences with so many human children but I had yet to ask any of them for a detailed summary of it.

The car appeared in a cloud of frustration and anger which made me roll out of the hammock and leap to the ground. I reminded myself that it was not Maria approaching in a cloud of rage and I was not going to bear the brunt of such volatile emotions.

Even so, when Jasper leaped out of the car and raced toward me I dropped into a crouch. I growled just enough to tell him I would defend myself if necessary.

With a dismissive hiss he passed by me, heading for the deepest sections of the forest. I stood up as he retreated and watched the trail of colours he had left behind. I doubted even I would be able to decipher them all.

Alice walked toward me slowly in a mist of worry. I concentrated on calming her with my talent.

"You'd have to touch me to make a decent impression," Alice whispered, "And that would just piss him off more."

"What happened?" It was not the best time, yet I was always curious.

Alice frowned into the distance, "A piece of shit boy cornered me and copped a feel. He was planning to get me alone and drag me off somewhere else but I wouldn't let him. I had to stop Jasper from killing him."

Just imagining the scenario made me angry; I had no doubt that in a similar position I would have killed the boy immediately.

"I admire his restraint," I said quietly, "Even now; I would be heading back toward civilisation to rip his head off."

"He promised not to," she sighed, "He keeps changing his mind but he never gets all the way into town before he stops in the visions."

"Alice, did you stop him to avoid being exposed or to save the life of that boy?"

She regarded me strangely, "Does it matter?"

"I'm not sure. Avoiding exposure makes sense, but saving the life of a future sex offender doesn't," I pointed out.

Edward walked toward us in a shroud of disapproval. His eyes were fixed on me.

_Earth to Edward_, I thought, _Are you reading me?_

He rolled his eyes, "Yes; loud and clear."

"Are you planning to go after Jasper to help him calm down?" I asked.

Edward continued to regard me through narrowed eyes, "I try to respect privacy where possible but your thoughts are worrying me."

I really did not care about his opinion; he had not lived my life. He knew about the mind but his understanding of emotions was infantile at best.

"This conversation can wait," I said bluntly, "Jasper needs help and no-one else knows what to do."

"Jackson - " Alice watched me with wide eyes. She could see what I was planning and from her limited perspective it must have looked awful.

Edward called out to me but I was already racing through the forest. He was fast enough to catch up; perhaps the images he could see in Alice's head kept him at bay.

Jasper's trail was fresh and he had made no attempt to hide it. The few times he had taken to the trees had been rough enough to tear some shreds of bark; he might as well have left a path of orange traffic cones for me to follow.

Jasper had stopped next to a recently pulverised tree which had been reduced to a pile of twigs and leaves. He stared down at the mess he had made with a blank expression. According to Bella I often wore a similar mask when I wanted to suppress my emotions. Perhaps Edward was correct in his judgement that Jasper and I were the most dangerous creatures on the planet.

"You can only cage an animal for so long before someone gets hurt," I said in a low voice.

Jasper looked up with a feral expression on his face. The shudder of fear which passed through me was accompanied by a thrill of excitement. Though the peace of the Cullen household was a welcome change, I had spent far too long as a warrior to release the violent ways.

"Am I the animal, or are you?" Jasper growled.

"Neither. The animal is the human who should be dead right now."

The rage he had been fighting surged forward again, just as I expected. He snarled at me menacingly.

"See the image of that boy," I instructed, "Feel the emotions he felt while he ran his hands over your mate."

Jasper launched at me in an explosion of violence. I dodged his first attack easily so he had to channel the aggression into tactics. I slammed him into another tree which tore his shirt and left a large chunk of bark sailing through the air.

Instead of waiting for his next move I sprang into the air and landed heavily on a sturdy branch a few metres high. I crouched in place and watched Jasper carefully.

The fury was fading with each moment that passed. As he prepared to leap I abandoned my perch to meet him mid-air. The boom which echoed through the forest sounded like the crash of thunder in a severe storm.

Fear and concern lapped at the edge of the small clearing we had made; clearly Edward had decided to make an appearance.

Like a violent dance we continued; our movements millimetres away from inflicting serious damage. Memories of sparring with some of the older newborns were usually not pleasant but there had been occasions where the bond forged between us had been strong enough for a friendship to grow. On those rare days when there had been no threat of a battle sparring had been a good way to train and pass the time; though I had always considered it to be training to kill. I could see how Jasper had embraced it as a hobby.

Had we been human I would have theorized that the exercise was a healthy way to expend the frustration of the day. As we were Vampires I was not sure why fighting was so effective at relieving stress.

I slammed Jasper to the ground and had my teeth at his throat long enough to make my point.

"One," I said simply.

I released him and jumped back. He did not look as threatening with dirt smeared across his face; but I would be stupid to discount the legendary Major as a threat.

The rage was back and as potent as ever; only this time it was directed at me completely. I planned the move to perfection, allowing Jasper close enough to latch onto my forearm with his teeth. There were too many scars on the limb for me to care about a new one anyway.

The moment his teeth sank into my flesh his rage disappeared, quickly replaced by guilt. We froze in place and listened to the deathly silence of the forest while Jasper sucked the venom out of the wound and spat it into the ground.

I watched him without speaking as he checked the wound to make sure it was clean. He whined deeply in his chest and slowly dropped to his knees. I mirrored his movements so we were both kneeling in the dirt facing each other.

He leaned forward to rest his forehead on my shoulder, exposing his neck to me. I did the same, resting my head on his slumped shoulder.

The Vampires watching us were confused but I silently ordered them not to interfere. They knew so little of natural Vampire behaviour that a lesson in the silent apology was overdue.

Jasper and I could have stayed there for hours sharing the burden of emotional sensitivity which weighed heavily on each of us. I was not surprised when a curious Vampire approached with an embarrassing lack of stealth.

"How can I help?" Carlisle asked.

Jasper pulled away from me and we stood up in synch. The gratitude he directed at me was appreciated.

"I don't think you can," Jasper admitted, "I have removed the venom from the wound."

Carlisle's eyes widened in shock, "You bit him?"

I extended my arm for him to inspect even though there was nothing further to be done.

"Jasper, this is not acceptable behaviour," Carlisle said heavily. Jasper looked down at the ground in guilt but my reaction was rather different.

My laughed drew Edward toward us. Alice and Bella watched from a further distance away. Jasper rolled his eyes at me.

"I don't understand what is so amusing," Carlisle said with annoyance.

I rested a hand on Jasper's shoulder to keep him in place while I struggled to contain my mirth. They had no idea how ridiculous the situation was.

Edward tried to explain but as always he was trying to be sensitive rather than blurting out exactly what was on my mind.

"I'm trying to maintain some privacy," Edward huffed, "Not everyone is as comfortable with their thoughts being blurted out for everyone to hear."

The laughter died down as I accepted how ignorant Carlisle was.

"Carlisle, in the South Jasper's name is repeated in terrified whispers," I began with an undignified giggle, "He is a legend whose very scent would send entire armies fleeing a battle in terror. During the last decade I reached a similar level of infamy. I purposely provoked Jasper into attacking me, and let him bite me and you describe it as 'not appropriate'!"

I dissolved into another fit of laughter and this time Jasper joined me. Even Edward smiled on one side of his face.

"My sense of humour is less developed than yours apparently," Carlisle offered, "But why did you want him to bite you?"

Clueless; were they really Vampires?

"Jasper's rage was not going to dissipate unless he killed the threat to his mate or attacked something else with that fury. It was better to add one scar to my collection so we don't have to risk exposure."

Carlisle nodded thoughtfully, "I understand even if I don't approve. We have spent so long trying to remain civilised but clearly we have a long path still ahead of us."

Jasper and I shared a look of understanding. I knew the opinions I wanted to express were ones which he would agree with.

"Carlisle, this family mimics human behaviour, yet humans are often completely uncivilised," I pointed out, "We are Vampires. We can be moral and civilised without denying who we are."

Carlisle stared at me in silence. Edward stepped up until he was just behind his father's shoulder.

"Tell him the rest of your thoughts," Edward said flatly, "You still plan to kill the human."

"You are really annoying sometimes," I said.

"And your thoughts are usually an echo of what comes out of your mouth," Edward pointed out.

"You read the thoughts of that boy; was assaulting Alice an isolated incident?" I asked.

"Jackson, we have no right to punish this child; the humans have their own legal system to deal with criminals," Carlisle reasoned, "Playing judge and jury is a sure path to madness."

The guilt which wafted from Edward like smoke from a fire drew my curiosity. Clearly the rebellious period from the 1920s still caused him guilt nearly a century later.

"I respect your opinion Carlisle, but I don't agree with it," I said honestly, "Do you expect Alice and Jasper to return to the school as though nothing happened?"

"No," Alice replied from across the clearing, "I won't step foot in that place while that piece of garbage is there."

"I can't go back," Jasper added, "I will kill him if I see him again."

Carlisle sighed, "I will create a medical emergency to excuse the two of you for the remainder of the year. Will he be gone by then?"

"Yes," Edward said, "He is already eighteen and will graduate in a few months."

I found it unbelievable that this family was so concerned with the safety of a pervert. Did they feel no guilt about the future victims that could be spared?


	21. A Helping Hand

**Jackson**

Carlisle, Edward and Bella returned to the house at a human pace. Without a word Jasper, Alice and I headed in the opposite direction.

Emotions were fluctuating enough to make me dizzy. Alice clearly knew something which she had not shared with Jasper or myself. We both watched her carefully.

"Two Empaths are twice as annoying as one," Alice finally conceded when Jasper and I halted suddenly and stared at her expectantly.

"You seem oddly relieved," I said curiously, "It can't be about the conversation we just had."

"No," she agreed, "Definitely not. Your future is already looking murky because of that. Remember; you're either with the family or you beg us for a quick death."

"Do I have to agree with Carlisle in order to stay?"

Jasper shrugged, "I often disagree with him."

"What happens?"

"I am usually ignored," Jasper replied with a hint of annoyance.

"Carlisle believes that all human life is sacred," Alice said with a frown, "Jasper and I disagree but Carlisle will always be the son of a preacher."

"Vampires and religion," I snorted, "There's a stupid combination."

"I know," Alice said, "But he is unlikely to change. We might have more of a chance with Edward actually."

That didn't seem likely. Edward was too stubborn to listen to anyone except perhaps his mate.

"How so?" Jasper was interested. This was clearly an issue that had festered for too long.

"The boy will no longer have me as a target for his disgusting fantasies," Alice said with a sneaky grin, "Yet Bella will be there every day."

"I'm not sure if that will make much of an impact on Edward," Jasper said worriedly, "Even when those humans wanted to gang-rape Bella before she was turned Edward didn't insist that they die."

I was shocked that any Vampire could contemplate their mate in such a situation without attacking something. How had Edward not ripped their heads off?

"Edward had to focus on keeping Bella safe," Alice explained, "But later he made sure the ringleader ended up hog-tied in front of a police station."

"That's it?" I asked incredulously, "Some jail time and he's free? That's insane."

"Edward won't go against Carlisle," Jasper sighed.

Alice smiled, "Who said it will be Edward who makes a move? Bella is not the clumsy, accident-prone human she once was."

Tanya arrived for a visit the next day. I watched her saunter forward into my visual range with the same awe that had struck me earlier. She was truly gorgeous. It was maddening that I couldn't just bond with her so I could be happily mated right away.

"Good morning Jackson," Tanya greeted with a smile, "You're looking sexy and dangerous at the same time."

No-one else had been brave enough to comment on my scars. The flash of fear she displayed was now only present in the fraction of a second when she first saw me. Once she recognised me as a friend it disappeared.

"I was just lamenting that you are so beautiful and I am clearly hated by some sort of deity for not being able to claim you as my mate," I admitted.

She moved forward so we were able to speak quietly. Had she been a stranger I would have been half-way up the tree before she halted.

"I did get a 'friends' vibe pretty clearly last time," she admitted, still smiling, "Did Alice have a vision?"

"Yes, and apparently when I do eventually meet my mate she is going to be healthy and human."

She caught her bottom lip between her teeth, "That is not good news; Edward had nearly a century or restraint and nearly killed her. Do you have any plans on how to train?"

"Not really; I was hoping you had some suggestions."

Within the hour Tanya had enlisted Esme in a plan to develop my ability to touch a human without injuring them. At first I was dubious how building a greenhouse would help at all but it was something to do.

Esme was thrilled that her garden would have a place to flourish in such a cold environment. While Tanya explained that handling plants was a good way to practise limiting my strength without risking harm to anything that could breathe I wondered how to bring up the reason why Alice and Jasper were not at school anymore.

I was admiring the row of small boxes I had built under Esme's direction. I had never been at all interested in plants as a Vampire, though I did have a vague memory of some sort of plant I had liked to smoke as a human. Considering the abundance it was probably tobacco I remembered. Cigarette smoke smelled absolutely vile to my Vampire nose so there was no chance I would pick up the habit again.

"Are Jasper and Alice wagging school?" Tanya asked suddenly, "I just spotted them making out in the forest."

"They'd better stay out of my hammock," I muttered, "I don't want their bodily fluids stinking up my favourite resting place."

Tanya giggled, "Maybe that's why Alice bought it for you."

I growled at that idea, though it was hardly aggressive.

"Shouldn't they be in class?" Tanya repeated.

"One of the students assaulted Alice there," I explained, "If they go back Jasper will kill him."

Tanya regarded me intently, "Assaulted Alice how?"

"She said that he 'copped a feel' and planned to kidnap her to perpetrate a sexual act," I said with as little emotion as possible, "Strangely even knowing that, she protected him from Jasper."

Tanya nodded, "I can see how you would find that strange."

"Can you? I assumed that killing the future sex offender would be a natural course of action; Edward acted like I wanted to skin a puppy and give it as a gift to an infant."

Her smile was gorgeous; it took effort to concentrate on what she was saying when she looked at me like that.

"Edward still hates himself for going rogue and killing people in the 1920s," Tanya explained, "He assumes that if you kill one, a rampage is on the horizon."

"There are ways to kill without spilling blood," I snorted, "Rosalie demonstrated that."

"Even if it were planned to perfection and the chance of slipping was absolutely tiny I doubt he would approve," Tanya continued, "He still holds himself to standards that Carlisle has lived by and it's impossible to reason with that."

"I don't know how Rosalie has put up with him for so long," I admitted, "His complete ignorance of the trauma left behind by sexual assault is infuriating."

She glanced at me thoughtfully, "Edward is a creature of the mind; he is a mere child in his understanding of emotions. He doesn't understand because it is too unsettling to imagine himself or Bella in that position."

"I will never understand him," I admitted.

"And he will never understand you or Jasper, despite hearing your thoughts. You don't need to agree with him to remain here thankfully."

"I do like it here for the most part," I agreed, "And I know I have a lot to learn, even if I have been able to resist human blood a couple of times."

"You're helpful to Jasper too," Tanya brushed her hands on her clothing and surveyed the greenhouse, "It's hard to believe we were so stupid we didn't realize his gift was making his control so tenuous."

"The materials for their cottage will arrive soon," I recalled, "Then they can stay the hell away from my hammock."

It really was a shame that Tanya was not destined for me. Her intelligence and humour ensured she was good company.

Alice and Jasper reappeared around midday. Alice announced that the sun would be out while the cottage supplies were being delivered within the next hour.

Esme disappeared inside. Within a minute she reappeared wearing a pair of white gloves and a large sunhat. I doubted the delivery people would suspect she was a Vampire; perhaps a time-traveller from the 1960s but not a Vampire.

"Jackson, you need a bath; you're filthy," Alice announced.

I rolled my eyes, "Thanks Alice, you look lovely too."

"I'll take Jackson for a swim in the river," Tanya offered, "the sight and smell of the upstairs bathrooms would make any male run away screaming."

"What on Earth could be in there?" I asked curiously.

Jasper shook his head and I quickly understood why. The litany of objects which were apparently 'necessary' for female Vampire beauty regimes sounded terrible. I couldn't remember what my mother and sisters had stored in the bathroom when I had been alive; other than a copious amount of hairspray.

Alice and Tanya entered the house to fetch 'bathing costumes' and their mischief-filled auras made me immediately suspicious. Jasper watched me with a smirk.

"They always look heavenly in bikinis," Jasper drawled, "And I have long since convinced Alice that I will not wear a Speedo if there is even the slightest chance of being seen by anyone other than her."

I gulped, "What's a 'Speedo'?"

His description left me on the brink of panic. If Alice expected me to don something like that I would be hiding back in my tree before she got anywhere near me.

A wave of calm settled over me. I glared at my uncle, a few generations removed.

"You can just say no to whatever she presents you with," he assured me, "It's not like she can force you to do anything."

He was right but I did not want to know what Alice could do to try to get her own way. I had had far too much experience with manipulative females in my lifetime.

Some clothing sailed out of the upstairs window, accompanied by a giggle. Jasper dashed over to catch the bundle before it hit the ground. He was muttering something unpleasant as he returned.

"Do I want to know?" I asked anxiously.

Jasper held out a pair of black shorts which were long enough for me to consider wearing. The sleeveless top in a dark grey was less impressive.

The countless scars on my arms were not going to go on display. Alice could shove the idea up her -

"You are a foul little boy sometimes," Alice huffed as she emerged from the house in a dark blue bikini which barely covered anything.

I began to reply but the sight of Tanya wearing three strategically placed triangles and nothing else stole all conscious though from my brain. Even if she was not my mate I wanted her badly; I doubted even Jasper was immune to her charms.

Tanya smiled at me while I tried not to drool.

"Jasper will be showing the scars on his arms," Tanya said gently, "Alice thought that showing your scars to us would be less threatening than dealing with the whole family. I must admit I am curious about them."

Alice giggled. I did not want to know where Jasper's hands were considering how she was dressed.

"I'll wear the stupid shirt," Jasper muttered.

Tanya was holding the clothing that Alice had picked out for me. She held it toward me hopefully.

How could I stand tall next to such beauty if my ugliness was on display? It wasn't just the appearance, but the humiliation and suffering that they represented. Yet I could not deny that the worst scar was the one which dominated my face.

Jasper headed into the forest while Alice remained. I slowly took the clothing from Tanya.

"One day your mate will look at you with such love that you will begin to accept what the rest of us know," Tanya said quietly.

I rolled my eyes at her poetry, "And what's that?"

"You deserve happiness as much as the next person."

Jasper made a retching sound from beyond the tree line. I was glad that he knew exactly how to lighten the mood.

Tanya began to say something else but Alice cut her off with a growl. I watched the small Vampire with growing concern.

"Tanya, if you do that your friendship is going to dissolve before it begins properly," Alice huffed.

My own curiosity was matched by the cloud from Jasper. He stepped back into sight to observe the three of us.

"Do what?" I asked.

Tanya shrugged, "I was only going to suggest that you boys might feel more comfortable if I was topless too."

The expression on my face left both of the girls giggling. They dashed past Jasper in a blur.

"Women," Jasper huffed.


	22. Swimming

**Jackson**

Had I been human the sight of the small lake would not have held any appeal at all. The chunks of ice floating on the surface were not at all inviting.

"No skinny-dipping Alice," Tanya instructed firmly, "If I have to keep my clothes on so do you."

Jasper and Alice both muttered something uncomplimentary. I silently thanked Tanya. The cold did not have the ability to make my sensitive regions shrivel up but the thought of a happy couple getting frisky within close proximity certainly did.

I had been trying not to stare at the scars on Jasper's arms displayed so deliberately by the sleeveless shirt but nothing can be hidden from an Empath.

"Go put the stupid shirt on," Jasper encouraged, "Then we can compare spider webs."

Alice stepped into the water without hesitation, her lithe body sinking easily into the murky depths. She called over her shoulder for Tanya to join her.

I decided to throw caution to the wind and display my arms. Alice plunged into a vision within seconds. I monitored her emotions carefully when it had passed and the relief I could see encouraged me to move away so I could change without any other body parts being displayed.

After dreading their reactions so badly their lack of fear was a relief. Tanya met me as I emerged from the trees. Her smile didn't falter even as I dropped my eyes to the ground and waited for her revulsion.

She reached out and traced the scar on my cheek. I slowly raised my head to see her eyes.

"You still look as sexy as you did when I first met you; the danger adds spice. Your mate is going to be an extremely lucky woman. Come on; the water is cold but fun."

She took the clothes I had taken off and stacked them neatly on a rock. I wondered if Alice was going to throw them in the trash and make me wear something seriously embarrassing.

Alice splashed water at her mate and the two of them were clearly ignoring me on purpose. I was grateful for their tact.

The bikini Tanya wore flattered all of her curves. She confided that Alice had convinced her to wear it to distract me from my concerns. I wasn't sure if I should thank the annoying little psychic or attempt to drown her.

While Tanya and I slipped into the water Alice was telling her mate about the large, heated spa she was going to buy.

"If it's too close to the house Rosalie and Emmett will never get out of it," Alice mused, "Though once the stripper pole she ordered is installed they'll be busy for a few months."

"They're just jealous of your routine," Jasper purred.

Tanya pretended to vomit as we drifted toward them, "I have the reputation of a succubus but the sheer volume of leather you own would give me nightmares if I could sleep."

Alice grinned, "When I'm on the pole the leather suits the metal background perfectly."

"You told me it was for decoration only," I accused, "Is that why you're pushing me to take your room?"

Jasper shrugged, "You might find a use for it one day, when you find your mate."

I snorted, "Or when I train to become a Fireman."

"We're getting a new one in the cottage we're building," Alice added, "Cemented into the foundations - "

"Please stop talking," I begged, "The image of Alice putting on a strip show has scarred me forever."

"Why says I'm the only one putting on a show?" Alice giggled, "Jazz has his own set of leathers too you know."

"I'd make a fortune as a stripper," Jasper said with a wink, "The cowboy hat doesn't even fall off."

"You two could make a fortune as a double act," Alice teased. I planned to drown her just long enough for her to gasp from the vision.

"You can quit that terrible line of thought before your hair is completely destroyed in a near-drowning experience," I growled.

Alice pouted, "Jazz, are you going to let him speak to me like that?"

"Yep."

Alice splashed a wave of water over his head. He grinned back at her lazily, "I don't care if my hair gets wet love," he assured her, "And you're the only one I'd ever strip for."

Tanya settled herself next to me, cushioned her head against the bank and let her legs drift in the gentle current, "I know that was supposed to sound romantic but it gave me the creeps."

Floating there enjoying the company of Vampires I trusted not to attack me was rather relaxing. I arranged my body to mimic the position Tanya had demonstrated so my toes could be tickled by the current. The few little mounds of slushy ice which brushed my skin made me grateful that I was not sensitive to the temperature.

We remained there for hours comfortably. The conversation flowed easily and the descriptions of Edward and Bella's courtship were very interesting.

The sun had set, though that did not mean it was very late. Living so far north of the equator was a new experience for me.

Alice experienced another short vision and turned on me with an apology. She was clearly worried.

"Kate and Garrett have decided to visit," she said quickly, "I'm sorry Jackson, I didn't expect them to drop by; they're just getting over that lustful stage."

"They met when the Volturi were on their way, about ten years ago," Tanya supplied, "Garrett is nearly two hundred and converted to our diet for Kate."

Great; a former human-drinking nomad was coming over to inspect the latest freaky addition to the Cullen family. I had never met so many new Vampires in such a short period of time without engaging in a battle.

"Is this a Vampire convention centre or something?" I asked, the annoyance evident in my voice, "Are there always this many tourists?"

Tanya ran her hand down my arm in an attempt to offer comfort; there was no sexual intent behind her actions, "It is rare for a Vampire to join a coven, and to give up human blood is even more unusual. They're keen to meet you sweetie."

Jasper rolled his eyes, "It was the same when Alice and I showed up," he revealed, "It seemed like every second day someone new was showing up to sniff around reeking of curiosity."

"How did you cope?"

The sneaky grin on his face promised something entertaining, "Leave that shirt on and don't smile. Just stare at anyone who makes you uncomfortable."

"Four minutes," Alice predicted.

Jasper jumped out of the water and motioned for me to follow. Within seconds we were high up in the branches of a tree, dripping water on the bark.

"How did Jackson know to follow?" Tanya asked Alice, "Jasper didn't say anything."

"I think it's a military thing; hand signals or something," Alice supplied.

The approaching Vampires were fast and not concerned with stealth. I was impressed by how coordinated their movements were; if Alice hadn't predicted two visitors I would have sworn there was only one approaching.

I was almost angry that other Vampires kept showing up, and frustrated that my presence was apparently the cause. I had never been so bloody popular and it was awful. At least once they saw me they wouldn't be keen to socialize; the scar on my face was good for driving away strangers.

Tanya and Alice were drying themselves with the towels. Another pang of longing reminded me that my life was seriously screwed up; why was I not destined for Tanya?

"Knock it off," Jasper growled, "You're not allowed to have either one of them."

He hadn't attempted to rip my head off, so clearly he knew I was watching Tanya rather than his mate. Thoughts of accidently killing my future human mate had to be pushed aside as the two Vampires reached the ladies. Tanya grinned at her sister and brother-in-law.

"I knew you couldn't stay away Garrett," Tanya teased.

The male had black shoulder-length hair and broad shoulders. I was analysing his movements and calculating the best angle of attack instinctively. I suspected that Jasper was doing the same.

"Are you sure the new one isn't your mate?" the female asked, "You spend so much time here that we're all suspicious that you're playing a trick on us."

Garrett was experiencing protective emotions which worried me. If he thought he was going to scare me away from Tanya he was in for a nasty shock.

"Jackson and I are just friends," Tanya insisted, "I wish we were meant for each other but nothing in life is ever easy. We were just having a swim and you two scared the boys off."

Garrett snorted, "Jasper does not scare that easily."

"Neither does Jackson," Alice replied with a smile, "They were worried about scaring you two."

Kate glanced at her mate, "Why would we fear them?"

Jasper indicated that we were about to jump; apparently landing directly behind a pair of unfamiliar Vampires was a good idea in his mind. I wondered if he had always been insane or if it had happened so gradually that he hadn't realized.

Jasper landed on the grass a full second before I did. Garrett and Kate were startled by his appearance, so mine elicited aggressive growling.

I remained crouched on the ground, eyeing the two of them warily. Women were never to be underestimated in the Vampire world but in this instance I viewed Garrett as the most threatening. If he lunged toward me I would rip off the first limb I could get a good grip on.

Surprisingly Garrett yelled, "Shit!" and then tried to shield his mate. Alice and Tanya began to laugh.

I stood to my full height less than a metre from Jasper. I mimicked his position; arms crossed over his chest and a frown aimed at the couple.

Predictably their eyes were drawn to the scars on our arms. Garrett took a step backwards, dragging Kate with him.

"Where the hell did you find him?" Garrett asked rudely.

"I've lived here for over sixty years," Jasper replied curtly.

If Vampires could blush Garrett would have been red; embarrassment curled around him liberally.

"Sorry," Garrett managed, "But seriously it looks like someone cloned you Jasper."

I rolled my eyes. Jasper didn't take his eyes off the black-haired male.

"Jasper is my great-great uncle," I supplied.

Kate elbowed her mate in the ribs and hissed that he was being rude. She stepped forward with a smile.

"It's nice to meet you Jackson," she said, sounding almost sincere, "Ignore Garrett; he often has his foot in his mouth."

Garrett continued to stare at me with wide eyes. He tried to pull Kate away from me but she shrugged him off. I admired her courage.

Behind them Alice grinned and nodded at me. I mustered my most charming smile and extended my hand toward Kate. She allowed me to gently take her hand like an old-fashioned gentleman.

"Lovely to meet you," I said as I gently kissed the back of her hand, "And your pet Garrett."

Tanya and Alice burst into laughter, swiftly followed by Jasper and Kate. Garrett frowned at me but the fear ebbed slightly.

"I deserved that," Garrett admitted when the noise level dropped again, "I am sorry; that scar is pretty freaky."

Clearly Garrett had less of an internal filter than I did; something I hadn't thought possible.

"I hadn't noticed," I replied sarcastically, "It's not like every Vampire I have ever met reacts to my face with terror."

"And an Empath too?" Garrett realized, "How the hell do you stand being around Edward and Bella?"

"Treehouse," Jasper supplied, "Though you two are nearly as bad."

"That's one of the reasons why I am rarely home," Tanya laughed, "Hearing you two moaning every ten minutes gets seriously boring."

Thankfully she managed to draw Garrett and Kate's attention to her. Jasper and I were back in the treetops before they realized. Kate quickly figured out where we had disappeared to but Garrett looked around suspiciously with a growl. Clearly he had spent his nomad years avoiding other Vampires because he didn't think to look up.

"Jackson is slightly more social than Jasper initially was," Tanya said with a smile.

"Only just," Alice added.


	23. Not-so-calm Discussion

**Jackson**

The proverbial shit hit the fan a couple of weeks later. I was lying on the neatly made bed in my new room, reading a book. It was actually an atlas which I was using to decide if I wanted to go travelling for a few years.

Alice had dropped some hints about me going on an extended vacation with Tanya but I hadn't made any decisions so I doubted she actually knew anything.

Carlisle and Esme had been ordered out of the house by Jasper; their anniversary was coming up and the emotions pouring off them were intolerable. Jasper could have simple turned the lustful feelings toward his wife but I had no such outlet. He was protecting me and I was grateful.

Alice was sketching something while lying on the floor of my room. Jasper was sitting nearby watching her. They could have retreated to their own cottage if they wanted to be alone; instead they were making sure I didn't spend my days feeling lonely and sorry for myself.

The pencil fell from her hand to land on the carpet. Jasper froze in place, completely focused on his mate.

I had seen Alice experience enough visions to ignore her, yet the concern surrounding Jasper piqued my interest. He was rarely worried by her talent but when he was, the vision led to trouble. It made sense to me that their connection allowed him to detect when her visions demanded immediate action.

Alice blinked and her emotions resolidified, "Bella and Edward will be home soon," she announced, "Just before Rose and Emmett get here. We're having a family meeting."

That didn't sound so threatening yet Jasper was clearly disturbed.

"What's the meeting about?" I wondered.

"That pervert from school," Alice whispered, "Bella is about to break his arm."

Jasper reached for his phone. Alice caught his wrist before he could dial a number.

"If it doesn't happen today it will be worse tomorrow," she sighed.

By the time Bella stomped into the house the three of us were sitting together on the couch patiently waiting. Bella froze in the doorway to regard us with suspicion. Her fury followed her like a deep-red cloud and sections of it darkened as she watched Alice.

"Did you know?" Bella demanded.

Jasper slid an arm around his mate. I admired his self-control as he was suppressing his need to growl.

"Not until seconds before he accosted you," Alice said softly.

Bella raced upstairs as Edward entered the house. He stood at the bottom of the stairs and gazed up at the second floor sadly.

"Carlisle and Esme will be home in a few minutes," Alice said to the telepath, "Rose and Emmett are pulling up now."

"Do we have to do this now Alice?" Edward asked tiredly.

Alice stared at him without speaking. His eyes widened and genuine fear appeared in his aura. Strangely he turned his eyes on me and growled.

"What the hell did I do?" I asked even as I congratulated myself on refraining from dropping the F-bomb.

"Nothing yet," Alice answered, "If all goes well."

Edward grumbled as he moved to sit on the opposite couch. He pulled his knees up to his chest and rested his chin on them. He reminded me of Atlas struggling to hold up the weight of the world.

Bella stomped down the stairs, the anger present in every impact on the floor. She could have moved in complete silence with very little effort.

Even though her anger was directed in part at her mate she sat down beside him, holding a folded piece of paper in her hand.

Within minutes the rest of the family had gathered. I watched Carlisle with interest; waiting for him to take charge.

"That pervert got me alone and tried to stick his hand up my skirt," Bella spat, "I want to know what we're going to do about him."

Carlisle swept his eyes over the room. His gaze lingered on Edward, who sighed and shook his head.

"Enough silent conversations," Rose snapped, "Clearly this piece of shit needs to be taken out."

"Rose, we can't kill every criminal in the world," Esme said softly.

"I'm not advocating that; but the human justice system is clearly inept at dealing with sexual deviants," Rose said flatly.

I agreed with her but kept my opinion to myself. I was curious to know who agreed with Esme.

"We've been through this before," Carlisle reminded Rose, "It is not our place to judge."

"I think it is," Bella argued, "We're trying to fit in with humans, we can understand more than they can and we have the power to protect the innocent."

It was an argument which continued for at least an hour. Bella, Rose and Jasper wanted to make the problem disappear in a bloodless fashion as long as it didn't bring suspicion down on the family. Carlisle, Esme and Edward wanted to simply ignore the human or move.

Emmett and Alice did not offer any opinions but nodded when their mates were arguing.

I could see both sides of the argument but personally I agreed with Bella, Rose and Jasper. Edward and Alice would be able to determine if there was any hope of the boy changing his attitude as he matured and Jasper would be able to detect the lack of emotions which indicated a sociopath. As long as we were careful I did not see the problem.

The strong emotions I could sense from Carlisle did not show on his calm face. He was quite dedicated to his non-violent stance, which I found quite interesting for a Vampire.

Even if the argument was settled for the short-term I was sure it would resurface in the future. With decades stretching ahead of the family I wondered how long Carlisle could hold his coven together.

Edward was watching me out of the corner of his eye; he was not particularly discreet.

Would the family split into two groups? Could the bonds between these vegetarians hold if Carlisle led one group and Rose led another? I could imagine Carlisle, Esme and Edward as a coven; they had been alone in the past.

A coven led by Rosalie containing Emmett, Jasper, Alice, Bella and myself would be a new concept to everyone.

Edward turned to face me directly, reeking of concern, "Jackson-"

"Drop it Edward," Alice interrupted smoothly, "Unless you want that future to play out within days."

I watched Alice thoughtfully. Was splitting the coven a real possibility?

Rosalie and Edward were arguing; something that happened more often than I was comfortable with. How on Earth did she tolerate him?

"Edward, sit down," Bella said quietly, her voice cutting her mate off completely. There was something in her posture which did not invite argument. The glare she levelled at Edward and Carlisle impressed even me.

Edward sank down to sit next to his mate. He had tactfully avoided arguing with her directly.

"Edward, I would like to speak to the family about Lonnie," Bella said firmly.

Edward sat back against the cushions. I recalled that Lonnie was the human who had led the pack who had tried to gang-rape Bella while she was still human.

"What about him Bella?" Carlisle asked worriedly.

"I know you delivered him to a police station and then he went to jail for his crimes," Bella began coldly, "Did anyone bother to check up on him after that?"

Apparently no-one had.

Bella unfolded the piece of paper in her hand. It was a photocopy of a newspaper article.

"He was out in two years," she informed us, "And then he raped a fourteen-year-old girl. He was sent back to jail for another eight years."

She glanced at her mate then stared at Carlisle, "When he is released I am going to kill him so he cannot hurt anyone else."

Carlisle sighed, "Bella - "

"I understand if you want me to leave the family after that Carlisle," Bella said honestly, "And I will leave without a fuss but don't you dare tell me I don't have the right to do this. We gave the human justice system the chance and it has failed."

A long moment of silence followed her pronouncement. Pride radiated off Rosalie, who smiled at Bella in agreement. Emmett and Jasper clearly approved too.

Carlisle cleared his throat, "When the time comes I am happy to revisit the discussion. For now this boy at school is the priority."

"Do I have permission to kill him?" Rosalie asked Carlisle bluntly.

Alice reached out to squeeze my knee, "Jackson has a suggestion."

I looked at her in confusion. I did have an idea but I didn't want to cause dissention within the family, let alone involve another coven.

"Go ahead Jackson," Alice encouraged.

"What if we ask Tanya for assistance?" I suggested hesitantly, "He doesn't know her and she is not connected to us as far as the humans are concerned. If he tries anything with her - "

"Our hands remain clean while she does the dirty work," Edward finished. He was clearly not impressed.

Alice pulled out her phone and speed dialled Tanya. Within minutes she was strolling though the front door; I suspected Alice had asked her to remain close.

"Did you plan this Alice?" Edward asked bluntly.

"I saw it as a possibility. Tanya is usually close by as she spends lots of time with Jackson."

Tanya regarded the assembled Vampires with a raised eyebrow. Within a minute the situation had been summarised.

"This is not fair," Edward insisted, "We cannot wash our hands of guilt by asking Tanya to step in."

"I agree," Tanya replied, "There is no guilt here. I shall meet this human and if he remains polite he will be left unharmed. If he tries to use intimidation or force I will kill him."

Carlisle was clearly unhappy and Edward was quick to follow. I wondered if Edward would be better off spending a few decades away from his sire.

"Tanya, we can't ask you to do this, it's not right. We have no right to judge," Carlisle said.

Tanya reached out to rest her hand on his shoulder. She was quite calm but there was something ruthless I could only just sense in her aura.

"Carlisle, I love you like a brother but I cannot agree with you on this," she said softly, "Predators like this are truly as evil as the fictional Vampires humans fear; they inflict suffering not for survival but because they enjoy it and have no regard for others. Until you find yourself at the mercy of a deviant like that you cannot really understand; I can remember as a human woman feeling under threat every time I met a strange male. Simply being female was akin to wearing a target."

"I wish someone had stepped in to kill Royce," Rosalie admitted, "Maybe I could have met Emmett when we were both human."

Guilt swirled around Edward. I suspected he had been in a position to stop Royce and had chosen not to act. After seeing what had happened to Rosalie I didn't understand how he clung to the idea that such monsters should be allowed to attack whoever they wanted.

Tanya regarded Carlisle with confidence, meeting him equally as the leader of a coven. He knew he had no sway over her beyond his words.

"For the record, I do not approve of this," Carlisle stated.

"The boy will determine his own fate," Tanya replied, "If he behaves himself no harm will come to him. No matter what the outcome I will endeavour to make sure no suspicion is cast upon your family."

Fate really did have something against me; every day I admired Tanya even more than the previous one. Obviously some higher power agreed with me that I was not good enough for her.

I hoped that one day I would be able to execute such a predator cleanly; if I tried it anytime soon I would return with blood-red eyes or not at all.

Edward was watching me again. The frown he wore matched the shroud of disapproval he cloaked himself in.

He was lucky that Vampires couldn't get wrinkles.


	24. A matter of trust

**Jackson**

I could see the purpose behind meeting Carlisle at 3am each morning for a discussion about whatever was on my mind but I had enjoyed the fortnight where he had been on nightshift.

"Two months," Carlisle said as a greeting. I was in my hammock and he was sitting in the small tree-house perched in arms reach.

The family meeting still played on my mind. I could not see a long-term resolution which could keep the coven together.

"It has been a very interesting two months," I agreed, "Even now I have to remind myself that no-one is going to attack me and I don't have to constantly watch my back."

"You have made remarkable progress," Carlisle noted, "Jasper had been here almost a decade before he was able to relax as much as you have."

"Thank-you," the pride I felt at his approval caught me by surprise. Maria's endorsement had always led to something unpleasant.

"I wonder if I will change when I find my mate," I mused, "Hopefully there will be less drama than Edward had to deal with."

"I doubt your mate will also be your Singer, but you do not have the decades of self-control which Edward did. I am impressed by your control when delivery men turn up; we should begin excursions into populated areas soon."

That was how I ended up in the back of a van with the window open a crack while Edward, Rosalie and Emmett huddled within arm's reach waiting for me to go mental. Carlisle was driving.

The scents were intoxicating. I had avoided large populations for nearly two months so the lure of dozens of humans had the venom flowing almost immediately.

Carlisle and Emmett were hopeful even while the situation remained so precarious. Rosalie was annoyed but it was aimed more at Edward than at me. The sibling rivalry between the two of them was almost amusing at times.

My throat burned even though I had hunted only two days earlier. The bear I had drained had been satisfying at the time; now the memory was revolting.

"You're doing well," Edward assured me.

If he was being honest he was deluded; I was seconds away from bolting.

"You are too hard on yourself," Edward argued, "Your thoughts are still coherent; if you were about to lunge for the door they'd change."

A particularly potent scent reached me. Why did I want to drink from animals anyway?

An image of Bella provided hope. Edward was surprised and then suspicious but I held the picture of his mate in my mind. My mate was going to be human; if I didn't master my thirst I might as well jump into an active volcano.

Training with Jasper was much more effective. The thought flickered by before I suppressed it.

"Jasper took you near people?" Edward demanded. I cringed automatically; the volume of his growl indicated aggression. I was in no position to defend myself.

"A couple of times," I admitted.

Edward launched into a lecture on how irresponsible we had been. Carlisle clearly agreed with the assessment.

"Did it work?" Rosalie asked curiously.

We had made a game of it; as soon as one of us scented humans the other would blast them with a wave of revulsion. Within an hour the delicious scent was immediately accompanied by an uneasy feeling as my body anticipated Jasper's talent. I was sure that with practise we could train each other to be disgusted by the scent of human blood.

"Quite well, though it was stupidly dangerous," Edward grumbled, "Jasper should have known better."

Jasper had been feeling suffocated by Edward's mood swings; since I had arrived the telepath had reeked of so much distrust that Jasper couldn't cope properly.

"That's not fair," Edward argued weakly.

Carlisle guided the vehicle back toward the Cullen house while I continued to relay to Edward what Jasper had shared.

_"It took Edward over a decade to trust me," Jasper confided sadly, "It wasn't until I protected Esme from a nomad that the distrust began to shift."_

_"You are the only one who can match him in a fight," I mused, "That would be scary to someone used to winning."_

_"It was the mock-fighting which chase away the last of the suspicion; knowing he could match me seemed to allow him to trust me," Jasper agreed._

_"But since I arrived the mistrust is back?" I guessed, "Maybe it will take him just as long to trust me."_

_Jasper shook his head, "The mistrust is worse than before, and directed at both of us."_

_"Have you asked him about it?"_

_Jasper rolled his eyes, "Edward is hard to talk to unless you're Bella. When he knows I want to discuss something important he mysteriously disappears."_

_"He could take one of us, but not both," I realized._

_"It's been over sixty bloody years," Jasper growled, "If he doesn't trust me now he never will."_

"We should listen to Jasper more often," Rosalie announced, clearly annoyed at the silent conversation I was having with Edward, "Don't you think Jackson?"

I shrugged, "He makes a lot of sense to me," I admitted, "We think the same way."

The tinge of surprise I could see around Edward was almost laughable. Of course I knew that Jasper and I didn't think the way the rest of the Cullen's did; we had been raised as warriors. Checking for exits and assessing others as though they were a threat was as natural as drinking blood.

"That's certainly true," Rosalie agreed, "I swear half the time I can predict your reactions based on experience with Jasper."

Edward glanced at Rosalie, who ignored him. The trace of jealousy around him was quickly extinguished as soon as I noticed it.

"We may have to rethink our strategy," Carlisle said as the house loomed onto view, "Clearly we have been causing Jasper unnecessary suffering over the years."

I wondered if Edward had never really trusted Jasper; he had simply taken comfort in the knowledge that he could defend himself against the scarred Vampire if necessary.

Though it was unfair I could understand why the telepath had trouble trusting the two of us; we were dangerous. The training, abuse and battles we had survived had ensured that when we fought we regressed to vicious creatures of instinct.

Was it even possible to explain the distinction between friend and foe which occurred in our minds? In a situation where I was threatened it would depend on who was the aggressor and who was on my side; I was sure the same decisions were made by Jasper in the heat of battle.

Edward was eavesdropping again; I could tell by the way he was watching me. The cloud of curiosity he was generating was a dead giveaway.

We reached the house without incident. Carlisle assured me that he would speak to Jasper about designing a new strategy to help me acclimate to human blood. Edward headed into the forest but Rosalie and Emmett lingered.

"Ignore grumpy-git Edward," Rosalie instructed with a small smile, "He is like that with everyone learning to resist; it's not just you."

"He was always pissed off with me," Emmett supplied easily; "I don't think he eased up until the Second World War broke out."

"You were pretty bad," Rosalie said as she wrapped her arm around her mate, "Luckily I was able to distract you from most of the humans who caught your interest."

"Somehow I don't think that method will work for me," I said wryly. I began to walk slowly toward the tree-house and hammock. Rosalie and Emmett kept pace easily.

"Probably not," Emmett laughed, "Damn I was a pain; I drank two humans in the first month."

"And we had to move after each one," Rosalie added, "Grumpy is expecting you to turn up with red eyes and throw the family into chaos."

I could understand the expectation even as I found it annoying.

"How did Jasper fare in the first few years after he stopped hunting humans?" I asked cautiously.

"We had to wrestle him away from humans eighteen times in the first year," Emmett said easily, "He managed to kill four."

"Considering he was fighting against the hunger of seven Vampires, no wonder he had trouble," Rosalie added.

I found it odd that Jasper hadn't realized how badly he was affected by the others; it seemed blatantly obvious to me.

"He's such a private person," Emmett continued, "And the whole Empath thing helps him say what we need to hear to leave him alone."

Emmett was always amusing but I could see how much he wanted to understand Jasper more than he did. Rosalie always held back when Jasper was discussed; her knowledge of intimate details of his life had clearly remained a secret from her mate. I admired her for that.

"No-one can hurt you if you are alone," I said honestly, "Once you learn the lesson the hard way it is a difficult habit to break."

"You have managed pretty well," Emmett replied.

Had I? No-one bore bite marks in the shape of my teeth so that was a bonus.

"The worst anyone could do to me is kill me," I pointed out; "If I had a mate to protect I would be far more aggressive; especially if she wanted to drag me to a strange coven and hug a bunch of Vampires neither of us had met before."

"Do you think Alice has had that much of an effect on his behaviour?" Rose asked seriously.

"Of course; she is his salvation."

They shared a worried glance. I wondered if they could ever really comprehend how much of an impact Alice had, and always would have, on Jasper's existence.

"I have hope for myself because of Alice," I explained, "Knowing that it is possible for a Vampire to see a face as badly scarred as my own and not feel fear is a new concept to me. Even when I was in the South I had hope that after the agreed about of time I would be free. Jasper lived for decades believing that he was a monster who deserved to die; Alice is the tiny dot of heaven in a life dominated by hell."

"She's not that tiny," Emmett offered lamely, without smiling.

"I came straight here from the South," I continued, determined to make them understand, "Jasper spent years with a mated couple, sinking deeper into depression with every passing minute. Alice has helped to draw him out of that sinkhole, but it will always be there. He has learned to cope but it is a battle he has to fight every day."

I scaled the tree easily and settled into the hammock before either of them could claim it. They sat side-by-side in my tree house; I had elicited their solemn vows never to get up to anything in there. Esme would be very angry if I refused to use the little house she had built because lingering scents made the place intolerable.

"And being an Empath, he has to constantly stop himself from letting the depression leak out," Rosalie continued the conversation, "Which would only make it worse."

"Are you depressed too?" Emmett asked with his usual tact. Rosalie frowned at him and the confusion around him indicated he did not understand why he was in trouble again.

"Maybe a little," I admitted, "But I am sure I will adjust now that I am not in constant danger. I only hope that I can help Jasper; by helping him I will also be healing myself."

Rosalie met my gaze knowingly and her smile was grim. She and Jasper had shared their individual traumas, lessening the intensity of both.

I spent the daylight hours analysing my memories for every hint that Maria had given about Jasper; and there were many. Clearly she had treated me the same in the bedroom, but differently in other ways. She had mentioned at least twice her regret that she had tried to convince Jasper that he was her mate. By the time she had turned me she had accepted that any Empath in her army had an expiry date on their useful service. There had always been light at the end of my tunnel; Jasper had always expected the train.


	25. Progress

**Jackson**

A blast of revulsion hit me hard enough to make me double over and retch. I was happy to see Jasper stumble into a tree under the wave I threw at him. He was stronger but I was faster.

Edward stood to the right observing us closely; the rest of the family and Tanya were spread out in a loose circle in case one of us lost control and went hunting.

There was a campsite inhabited by humans at the edge of our scent range. Each time one of us caught a whiff of the mouth-watering aroma the double-blast of disgust left us both off-balance and uncoordinated.

Edward was struggling to suppress a smile but the amusement which filled the air around him was impossible to miss.

"Just let it out," I suggested as I braced myself against the trunk of a tree with one hand, "Laugh at our suffering so Carlisle grumbles at you."

Edward shook his head and glanced at Jasper.

"He's not allowed, or I will share the next wave with him," Jasper explained through gritted teeth.

"We're definitely getting better," I offered.

The annoyance in Jasper abruptly dissolved to be replaced by wisps of pride.

"I don't think I'll be able to smell a human without feeling sick again," he said.

After nearly a month of strengthening our control with this bizarre method the lure of human blood was still strong but not as overwhelming. Rather than losing myself in instinct there was a moment where I was able to make a decision whether to hunt or refrain. I liked having that control over such an important part of my life.

"You are both making remarkable progress," Edward said thoughtfully.

The happiness which grew around Jasper was interesting; he valued Edward's opinion nearly as much as Carlisle's. I wondered if it was because of his age, his control or both.

Edward pointedly ignored my thoughts, which was rather polite. I was sure I would never understand the moody teenage Vampire.

By midnight Jasper and I were thoroughly repulsed by the thought of drinking human blood. Edward also looked nauseous. I silently apologized for allowing the emotions to leak enough to affect him.

We gathered in front of the house so the rest of the family could be updated on our progress and congratulate us. To me it seemed rather pointless but I played along anyway.

The cottages for each couple sat quietly in the depths of the forest. While we gathered together I noticed Rosalie and Emmett trying to slip away in the direction of the one they had been allocated. The way Edward was watching Bella assured me that his thoughts were not platonic.

If any of them doused me with a wave of lust I would be tempted to rip an arm off; Emmett had made that mistake a week earlier and I had spent four hours with a painful erection. Ice-cold water had not helped.

Carlisle congratulated Jasper and I before allowing the gathering to break up. Tanya and I were left alone, as was often the case.

"I hate this," I grumbled. I was standing in the living room, completely unsure about what I should be doing.

"Hate what?" Tanya flopped down on the lounge and hung her legs over one end.

"Not having a purpose," I explained, "I spent decades always having responsibilities and tasks to carry out. Now I'm bored out of my mind."

Tanya tucked a pillow under her head and smiled at me lazily, "You need to figure out what is important enough to devote time to. I have multiple projects under way to occupy myself."

I sat down across from her, "Like what?"

"Well that boy who was bugging Bella for one," she said casually, "I also keep an eye on a few humans who have settled in the area since being released from prison to make sure they are not falling back into bad habits. I also write poetry."

"Poetry?" I repeated, "I can't see myself devoting hours to poetry I'm afraid."

"Well what did you do as a human to relax? Did you have any hobbies?"

I tried to recall the dim human memories. I could remember being in a war zone, exhausted and waiting got death but determined to make sure the men around me survived. An odd image caught my interest.

"Whittling," I realized, "I used to carve stuff out of wood sometimes."

"There you go," Tanya said with a smile, "Now that you're a Vampire you don't have to carve crude little things, you could plan an epic dragon to sit on the front lawn or something."

Tanya encouraged me to go find some suitable wood while she excused herself o go check on one of her ongoing 'projects'. If she was planning another poem I was not interested.

By the time Edward, Bella, Alice and Jasper were leaving for school I was sitting in my tree-house working on a lump of wood. It didn't look very impressive but I had an image in my mind which was slowly appearing.

A second car left the house but I didn't bother to check who it was; I was too engrossed in the new distraction I had found.

It was mid-morning when the sound of a Vampire climbing the tree drew my attention away from the Dragon foot I had nearly perfected. Since the height could be scaled in a single jump, the Vampire was being polite and trying not to startle me. I appreciated the manners which the Cullen's displayed.

Rosalie peeked into the doorway to watch me with curiosity. Sunlight illuminated strands of her hair.

"You look like an angel," I said softly.

Rosalie wiggled her eyebrows at me, "Nah; that sounds boring. Have you ever seen that bumper sticker that says 'Goddesses are Angels with bigger boobs?' "

Rosalie was always able to make me laugh. She was very perceptive for a non-Empath and I appreciated how often she went out of her way to make me feel more comfortable.

"You are definitely a Goddess," I agreed. I slid my nail carefully along the wood to finish the claw of the dragon.

"And compliments like that are why you are my favourite uncle," Rosalie laughed.

My hands stilled and I tilted my head, "Aren't I your only uncle?"

She shrugged, "Irrelevant. Anyway, my Emmy-Bear has classes and it was so boring last week I couldn't contemplate going again. What are you up to?"

I presented my shabby, half-formed dragon. It resembled something which had been deposited by a passing dog, only with bird feet.

"I've never tried carving," Rosalie mused, "I prefer engines; less splinters."

"It's relaxing," I admitted.

Rosalie rolled herself into my hammock. I admired her legs before my eyes moved back to the object in my hand.

"Everyone needs an obsession," Rosalie said sagely, "Carlisle has medicine, Esme has architecture, Edward has music, Alice has fashion, Jasper has history and war strategy; I have cars."

"What about Emmett?"

The dreamy expression which softened her face whenever someone mentioned Emmett was oddly soothing; one day I would feel that way about someone too.

"Emmett has a little bit of everything, but I think he is obsessed with keeping the atmosphere jovial."

"And Bella?"

The tendrils of affection were entwined with annoyance, "Bella's obsession is Edward, but that is normal for now. In the next decade or two she will probably find something to focus on."

"No indications yet?" I could think of worse obsessions than carving; I could decorate the garden and give away any I didn't want anymore.

"She's too fond of the wolf-shifters but the awful smell should stop any long-term plans to adopt them or something," Rosalie mused, "Though all bets are off if Renesmee falls pregnant."

I recalled that Renesmee was the name of Bella and Edward's hybrid daughter. I asked Rosalie how they had come up with such a stupid name. Her laughter made me smile.

She explained the hybrid name for the hybrid child. It made some sense but still sounded weird.

"I resented Bella for the humanity she was willing to give up," Rosalie admitted, "When she fell pregnant I was overjoyed for her and yet miserable for myself. When I was human all I wanted was a family and babies."

Her sadness was deep yet it didn't seem to be destructive. Once again I admired her strength; I had seen emotions that strong drive Vampires insane.

"Is that Vampire still impregnating women in South America?" I asked, "Emmett mentioned him in passing once. I could see you and Emmett adopting a baby."

The sadness lingered around her, "Apparently Nahuel was his last child; he was trying for a son. Once he had one he stopped, which is good for the women."

"Maybe you should work in child care?" I suggested, "After a few years wiping snotty noses and cleaning diapers the longing might fade."

Rosalie rolled her eyes, "Or it would get worse. I might try it one day but in the mean time I'll just be grateful that I have Emmett. No matter how miserable I get he can always pull me out of it."

"I do admire his optimism," I admitted, "Though it looks exhausting."

Rosalie watched me silently as I continued to scrape away tendrils of wood I didn't need. Clearly she had something else to say.

"I'm worried about you," she said finally, in a voice so soft I barely heard her.

I didn't pause in my work, "In what way?"

"The first few years Jasper was here he tried to keep his talent from affecting us," Rosalie began carefully, "Every few months he needs to be alone and unleash it all. I am concerned that you are becoming increasingly irritable because you need the same outlet."

"I've never needed it before," I countered stubbornly as I mentally analysed my behaviour.

"In battle you let it all go," she explained, "You can pour all the emotions into your victim. Here you are a kettle on a slow boil."

She was probably right and I was relieved to realize that admitting weakness to Rosalie did not make me feel vulnerable. There was something oddly comforting about that.

"What do you think I should do?" I asked.

Rosalie smiled at me while relief glowed around her, "Let's go hunting and while you're all along you can unleash on all the squirrels or whatever."

"And Santa's reindeer," I said with a smile.

She rolled her eyes, "And Santa's reindeer."

**Rosalie**

Jackson seemed comfortable letting me lead the way. I recalled how Jasper had always wanted others to remain in his direct line of sight for the first few years but it felt different somehow.

Jasper was my brother, my comrade in times of strife who understood just how screwed up the world could be. He admired Carlisle as much as I did but he never let anyone convince him that life was all sunshine and roses.

Though Jackson was physically older than any of us there was something child-like about him. He had suffered through decades of torture with a sliver of innocent curiosity intact and every maternal instinct in my body bade me to protect it.

Ultimately I blamed myself for what happened, even though Jackson never did. I had been reckless by taking Jackson hunting by myself.

His growl startled me into an abrupt halt. I spun around to see him standing completely still with his head tilted back to optimise his sense of smell. His eyes were pitch black.

The faint scent of fresh, flowing human blood filled me with dread. I realized my foolishness in that instant.

I expected him to bolt after the delicious scent; even my throat burned. Instead his head turned back to regard me, his eyes wide with anxiety.

I approached him quickly, desperate to distract him from the bleeding human. I reached for him slowly and let my hands curl around his elbows. His raised his hands to return my grip.

"You are doing a remarkable job," I said soothingly, "Hold onto that control; it could be your mate out there, or one of her parents. Focus on me."

He could not control the emotions he was feeling; they poured into me like a raging torrent. The desperation and longing were strong, held back by determination and an iron will which left me in awe.

I could tell the moment when his thoughts turned to his future mate. Hope, grim determination and a different type of longing saturated the both of us.

The tang of blood in the air grew stronger; the wind was changing direction. I silently cursed it.

The tension in his arms alerted me to the battle which was slowly being lost. A stupid idea flickered in my mind. Emmett was not going to be happy.

Before Jackson could lunge in the direction of the blood I leaned forward and kissed him.


	26. Kiss

**Jackson**

The touch of Rosalie's lips on mine sent shivers through my body. The blood my burning throat demanded faded away just long enough for me to regain control.

I began to react to the kiss, returning it instinctively before my brain screamed at me.

We jerked away from each other at the same moment and the air was crowded with our apologies. In the future I hoped we could look back and laugh but for the moment I was horrified. I had done this; my thoughts of my mate had led to an emotional influence over Rosalie which was unforgivable.

Yet she grabbed my hand and dragged me forward, not stopping our southern momentum until we stood at the edge of the water.

"Swim," Rosalie ordered, "I'll follow. Go."

I wished I could drown. I reached the shore of Hagemeister Island and remained in the water, facedown and miserable.

Rosalie grabbed my hair and pulled me up just enough so my ears were free of the water.

"Quit this crap before I rip your arm off and hide it at the bottom of the ocean," she growled. Strangely there was no real aggression in her tone, just frustration.

I crawled out of the water and lay on my back on the shore. Rosalie glared down at me.

"It was one kiss; and not even a good one," she pointed out bluntly, "I don't care if your emotions were influencing me; I chose to kiss you to distract you from the idiot out in the forest bleeding."

She was gorgeous and so refreshingly direct that I felt myself begin to relax. Her strength reminded me of Maria yet they had little else in common.

"If you get all sulky and try to take all the blame it is the same as declaring that my decisions are meaningless next to yours. Now get up and go hunting before I get really annoyed."

I smiled a little at her tirade and did as she ordered. Before I disappeared into the forest I glanced back at her. She held up a hand before I could offer an apology.

"Not a word. Go kill something."

The guilt didn't remanifest. While I hunted the largest buck I could find I began to smile at the ridiculous situation. I would have to let Emmett throw me through a tree as an apology for kissing his mate, or letting her kiss me.

Rosalie had also finished off a large deer, scattered the remains and taken a seat at the edge of the forest by the time I returned. She looked so peaceful that I could almost ignore the smell of fresh blood in the air.

Her beauty was obvious but I admired her confidence more with each passing day. She was brave enough to be herself without apology.

"You seem calmer," Rosalie observed, "Hunger makes anyone cranky. Now go back in there and throw around as much of that pent-up emotion as you can; make the rats horny, piss off the birds and leave the reindeer rolling on the grass with laughter."

"Can reindeer laugh?" I asked.

Rosalie just rolled her eyes at me, "Hurry up before I call Emmett and tell him that I kissed you."

I shrugged, "He's going to find out eventually."

She grinned evilly, "Fine, I'll tear down your hammock and desecrate your tree-house with Emmett if you're not in that forest in three seconds."

I made it in less than one.

The herd of reindeer were seriously confused but I was feeling much more relaxed. I nearly admitted that Rosalie was right until I saw the smug expression on her face. Clearly she already knew that she was right.

"I bow to your wisdom!" I joked, "Never should anyone doubt your word Goddess Rosalie."

She rolled her eyes at me, "I would have accepted a short 'you were right, next time I should shut up and cooperate'," she pointed out.

I stood to attention and offered her a stiff salute. The lopsided grin took the edge off the pose, "Yes ma'am."

Rosalie stretched her arms over her head, which was clearly unnecessary. She watched my hand fall away from my forehead as I tried not to admire her body.

"Well while you're in the mood to take orders; I have decided what we're going to tell the family about that kiss."

I gulped, "And what would that be?"

"The truth; you were doing a very good job of resisting fresh, flowing human blood until whoever it was moved toward us. I could see how much you were struggling so I distracted you."

"Okay, but what should I say if anyone asks how you distracted me?"

Rosalie shrugged, "Tell them the truth; Edward is going to find out anyway."

We headed toward the water without haste. I thoroughly enjoyed standing next to a Vampire and feeling no fear or trepidation that she would turn on me at any moment.

"What are you thinking about?" Rosalie asked curiously, "You have a weird look on your face."

How could I explain my train of thought without insulting her? Surely she would not appreciate being compared to Maria.

"Out with it," Rosalie said with a smile, "I'm not afraid of whatever is going on in that mind of yours."

Instead of entering the water we sat down so our bare feet were being lapped by the gentle movements of the water.

I remained silent even though I wanted to speak, I just couldn't.

"I get it," Rosalie assured me, with a platonic pat on my knee, "You're used to seeing and processing emotions; not describing them."

"Living with Jasper has taught you quite a lot," I replied softly.

"And living with Edward and Alice has taught me an incredibly amount of patience," she added, "There is a universal expression of worry which all males have and I recognised it on you pretty easily."

"Like a pathetic Bat signal?" I guessed.

She slipped an arm around my shoulders and leaned her head against me, "Something is on your mind and I am honestly curious."

I sighed, "Maria was a manipulative bitch but she could be kind when she wanted to. I survived on the crumbs of affection she gave to me and the hope that after the allotted time I would be free."

I relaxed into the concerned emotional cloud wafting around Rosalie.

"She was strong and determined; it was not hard to follow her instructions even if she stood back and made me lead the charge into battle," I continued, "You are as strong as Maria ever was, yet there is no cruelty within you. I find it strange that I admire you but I don't fear you."

Rosalie lifted her head to regard me with a smile and a hefty dose of pride, "You are a good man Jackson and I am glad you decided to stay with us."

The conversation from weeks earlier was easy to recall. I wondered why Rosalie didn't break away from Carlisle and head her own coven. She had the control to kill rapists without feeding from them yet she didn't.

Hesitantly, I broached the subject.

"I consider Carlisle to be my father," Rosalie began quietly, "And his approval means a lot to me. I am proud that I have been able to exist as a Vampire for over eight decades without tasting human blood. I worry that if I spilled blood, even by accident, I would slip."

There was more to it, I could tell. I waited patiently while she considered her words.

"Emmett has terrible control as a Newborn; I would not want to tempt him when he has worked so hard to refrain. Even when I killed the men who attacked me, I did not feel guilt except over the two security guards in my way. They did not deserve to die just because I wanted revenge."

"I still find it odd that you all look to Carlisle as your leader," I admitted, "I can see the sense in the first decades of the diet but after so long I don't see the point."

Rosalie patted me on the back reassuringly, "We need each other because we are so isolated from the rest of the world."

"I don't see why two covens couldn't live in close proximity," I said, "There are no fights for territory and it would be easier to explain when interacting with humans."

"I was eighteen when I died," Rosalie pointed out, "You would have to be perceived as the responsible adult no matter who led the coven."

"Even if I was playing the father like Carlisle does, I would follow you," I said, "And that is not a loyalty I would offer many in this world."

"I appreciate the sentiment," Rosalie acknowledged with a smile, "And I am sure the issue of our increased numbers will lead to a split eventually. I just hope that no-one has to suffer when it happens."

"I could pose as Carlisle's older brother," I mused.

"And Jasper and I could be younger siblings who you gained custody of when our parents died," Rosalie added, "Then we would have to explain the others."

"Emmett, Edward and Alice could be Esme's younger siblings," I continued, "Maybe we could say she and Carlisle met at a support group for young adults who had gained custody of their siblings."

"Well it sounds better than the current one," Rosalie admitted, "We just have to figure out where Bella fits in. If only she was blonde."

"A cousin on the Whitlock side?" I suggested.

Rosalie nudged me playfully, "Maybe she can play the relative of your mate."

Always I was drawn back to the mate I desperately wanted to find. I spent hours dreaming of what she would act like; look like and how she would react to my scars.

"Assuming I ever find her," I sighed, "Tanya has been waiting a thousand years; I would be insane by now."

"You underestimate yourself," Rosalie argued, "Tanya has lived in hope, and on her own terms. She learned long ago to make no apologies for herself and to ignore the judgement of others. It is a lesson which would help you to cope."

I suspected it was a lesson Rosalie had learned from Tanya too.

"Tanya pinned her hopes on Edward but now that she has accepted that he was destined for Bella she is regaining her former perspective," Rosalie said softly.

The idea of Tanya, or anyone really, wanting Edward as their mate baffled me. I could forgive the mind-reading as he could not help it but the pompous attitude grated.

"She would have strangled him within a year," I predicted, "He's offer his arrogant opinion one time too many and she would rip his head off."

Rosalie laughed loudly; it was a beautiful sound, "As much as I love Edward as a brother he plays the annoying younger sibling far too well."  
"He sounds so confident but I can see how insecure he always is," I told her, "He was only a year younger than you when he was turned so why is he such a brat?"

Rosalie shrugged, "Girls mature faster than boys; I suspect Edward will never really grow up because he was too young when he was turned. He was an only child as a human and spent fifteen years as such as a Vampire. I also think our reliance on his ability to remain undetected has gone to his head."

"I want to like him as a person, but it's so damn hard," I admitted.

"Jasper hinted that Edward was never as confident as he sounded but I never realized how much he bluffs," Rosalie said thoughtfully.

"He is the classic teenage boy," I complained, "Acting so loud and full of himself to cover his fear of rejection. Carlisle must have the patience of a saint not to have ripped his head off at least once."

"Luckily Edward found his perfect match in Bella; the classic insecure teenage girl who doesn't realize that her life could be complete without a boyfriend."

"Please tell me that their daughter has reached a level of maturity that neither of her parents managed?"

Rosalie beamed, "Renesmee matured physically and mentally. Sometimes the way she looks or speaks to her parents makes it clear that she recognises their immaturity but she would never call them on it."

"And in a few weeks she'll be returning?" I tried to keep the trepidation out of my voice.

"Yes, along with the smelly in-laws. Thankfully they are as entertaining as they are odorous."


	27. Edward

**Jackson**

Edward emerged from the house as Rosalie and I approached. He stared at Rosalie with wide eyes and a cyclone of shock in his aura.

"Rose-"

"Good evening Edward," Rosalie greeted pleasantly, "I need a shower so I'll talk to you later."

I smiled at her dismissal of him and the way he stared after her with mounting alarm. I wondered what she was thinking to upset him so easily. Our conversation may have provided enough to rattle the telepath, and the memory of our kiss certainly could too.

Edward swung around to glare at me, "Kiss?" he demanded.

I smiled at him pleasantly, just as Rosalie had done. I realized that I didn't fear Edward, and I didn't have to like him in order to respect his place in the family.

I didn't even try to repress the memory of the influence of my gift and Rosalie leaning forward to kiss me. I was not proud of the way I had returned the kiss initially, yet I knew there was nothing else I could have done.

Edward lunged at me with a growl. I used his momentum to swing him past me and stood calm and tall when he turned to attack again.

"That was very stupid," I told him flatly, "What if I had reacted instinctively and decapitated you?"

Edward ignored my threat. I made sure the memory of the discussion of his immaturity was at the forefront of my mind to distract him from my moves.

Again and again he tried to knock me off my feet but his lack of fighting prowess was apparent. Even when my arms were within range he didn't try to bite me.

"You took advantage of my sister!" Edward hissed.

"Bullshit!" I returned indignantly, "She made a decision so keep your nose out of it!"

He ripped my shirt but once again didn't try to sink his teeth in. The sight of my mutilated arm and shoulder shocked him into a standstill.

"How dare you betray Emmett after all he has done to befriend you!" he hissed.

He really was irritating. Instead of avoiding his attack I used moves I had only unleashed on Jasper since I had left the South. I twisted his arm behind his back, kicked the back of his knees to force him to the ground and bared my teeth at his throat.

"Are you finished yet?" I demanded.

Edward gulped but the anger remained around him. The frustration mixing in only darkened his mood.

He reminded me of a young recruit I had met during the war. I didn't realize I had retained the memory until it flashed up at that moment. The boy had been cocky, immature and determined to prove himself. It had proved a fatal combination.

Did Edward not realize that his body was trapped as a teenager but his mind had the opportunity to grow?

The anger began to fade, quickly replaced by curiosity and even fear.

"What do you mean?" he asked quietly.

I released him slowly and moved around to face him. I sat down cross-legged in the middle of the driveway. Edward remained on his knees and rubbed the arm I had twisted with the other hand.

"You are seventeen," I tried to explain, "Your mind will always be seventeen; you have to make a conscious effort to break away from thinking like a pompous teenager who knows everything."

Edward stared at me in confusion, clearly insulted by my description of him even as he slowly accepted the truth of it.

"You may be the oldest in years but because of your age you cannot escape the fact that you are the annoying little brother in the family. You have played the part so well because you are not acting."

Sadness overwhelmed him. I didn't like forcing this revelation upon him but if the others were too blind to see it I had no other choice.

The memory of the boy who had died in my arms still stung; did I leave behind a little brother in my human life? I remembered my older sisters but I had no idea if I had any younger siblings.

"I don't want to be the spoiled brat Rosalie thinks I am," Edward muttered.

I smiled, "She doesn't think that you are spoiled," I argued, "A brat yes, but not spoiled."

"Somehow that doesn't help," Edward sighed.

I remembered the recruit again. I doubted Edward would appreciate being compared to a human boy who had died decades ago yet the connection had been made. Physically there was very little resemblance except for the confusion born of youth.

"We all have our instincts to keep in check; yours involves questioning everything you say to make sure you are not about to insult the person you're speaking to," I clarified, "I have to unravel seventy years of violent conditioning."

Edward glanced at something behind me. I recognised Rosalie's footfalls.

"And I need to stop pushing forward shallow thoughts just to keep you out of my head," Rosalie added quietly, "I know it is not your fault but I could never handle the idea of such an invasion."

Edward stared at Rosalie in wonder and uncertainty. She had hidden her true self for so long I suspected that by the time she truly opened up he would be meeting a new sibling.

"You annoy the crap out of me Edward," Rosalie continued, "But I love you as much as I loved my little brothers when I was alive."

"There's more to this story, isn't there?" Edward asked her carefully.

I glanced at Rosalie, whose emotions were as intricate as a kaleidoscope.

"A lot more," I said to Edward.

"One day," Rosalie managed, "But not today."

She disappeared back into the house. For her sake I hoped Emmett would be home soon.

Edward stared at the open doorway thoughtfully. I kept my thoughts on the boy from the war, Edward's relationship with Bella and my longing to understand both of them.

"Looking back I am sure I was too harsh on Jasper when he arrived, and right up until you showed up," Edward admitted heavily, "I look at the two of you and see what I missed out on as a human."

"Being a soldier and fighting in a war is not glamorous," I replied sadly, "Jasper and I bear more internal scars than external ones."

Jealousy still remained, curling around him like smoke.

"Other Vampires look at you and feel intimidated," Edward pointed out, "They look at me and wonder if I have a boyfriend."

"That is part if your curse, and to balance it you have a daughter. I have never considered children but knowing I don't have the self-control to ever sire a child leaves me very envious of you."

Edward stared up the driveway, clearly lost in his thoughts.

"I can add a nasty scar to your face," I offered, "Though Bella would probably rip off a limb or two in retaliation."

A smile tugged at his lips, "She is fierce."

"Have you told her that?"

He met my gaze again, "Why would I?"

"You act as though she still needs protecting, and I can tell it annoys her."

His brow furrowed, "I didn't realize that."

"Well you are not alone in being puzzled by women; all men are clueless from what I can tell."

The crunch of gravel in the distance heralded the arrival of a family member. Edward and I stood up and began to move out of the way to avoid blocking the car.

"Thank-you Jackson," Edward said quietly, "I think I know why I overreacted."

He explained the presence of Jacob in Bella's life and the conflicts which had arisen as a result. Emmett guided the car past us and into the garage.

"He had the hots for your wife, who is now his mother-in-law?" I asked, failing to keep the laughter out of my voice.

"Yep, completely screwed up," Edward confirmed.

"I wonder who is the better kisser?" I wheezed through my laughter.

With a disgusted expression Edward left to enter the forest.

"Hey Edward!" I called after him. He paused and waited for my question.

"Have you given him a flea-collar yet?"

Edward left in a blur. I could hear Emmett laughing behind me.

"What happened out here?" Emmett asked as he surveyed the driveway. There were gouge marks from the fight.

"Slight disagreement," I said, suddenly remembering that I would have to let Emmett throw me around for kissing his wife, "Is Esme going to be angry?"

"Nah, let's just fix it up before she gets home."

In less than a minute the job was complete, even with Emmett reorganising every area I attempted to smooth out.

"So what was the fight about?" he asked jovially.

Rosalie appeared in the doorway before I had to answer. She smiled at me before beaming at her mate.

"My love, would you believe that Edward was attempting to avenge my honour and your pride?" she asked innocently.

"Not really," Emmett said. He scooped her up into a bear hug and nuzzled her hair.

"It's true," I admitted, "Rose took me hunting and some human was out there bleeding."

Emmett deposited Rosalie on her feet and looked at my eyes searchingly.

"He resisted," Rosalie said proudly, "Until the human stumbled closer. I swear some have no preservation instincts at all."

"So what happened? I can see that you're eyes aren't red."

"I had to distract him in a major way," Rosalie said, her voice dropping, "I understand if you're angry, but I had no choice but to kiss him."

Hurt marred Emmett's features, "You kissed him?"

Rosalie nodded, "I couldn't think of any other way to avoid bloodshed."

I was amazed at how easily he forgave her, "I guess I understand, but I reserve the right to kick your arse one day Jackson," Emmett growled.

"Understood."

"Next time, you should come hunting with us," Rosalie suggested.

"Alright," Emmett agreed, "But I'd let a whole city of people die before I'd kiss him."

I retreated to my hammock as soon as Rosalie picked Emmett up and carried him up to their room. As long as I couldn't see or hear what they were doing I was safe enough.

I analysed each move I had made during the fight, as was a habit. I was proud that I had refrained from hurting Edward; the violent reflex had been dampened over the months of peace I had enjoyed.

I drifted into my own thoughts and the fascinating night sky spread out above me. I spent at least ten hours in that state, my Vampire brain following a single track rather than the multiple layers of thinking which was most common.

I enjoyed the lengthy hours of darkness which had accompanied the winter months. No matter where in the world I lived, I never enjoyed summer.

The altercation and resulting conversation with Edward left me with a serenity I had not expected. I had been letting myself speak the honest truth since I had left the South and for once it had worked. I doubted anyone else had ever sat Edward down and pointed out the problems in his assumptions.

I trusted Carlisle and Esme as leaders in the coven/family and felt that they were happy with the relationship. The others were their 'children' but I didn't need the parental guidance like most of the others. The nightly sessions with Carlisle had become infrequent, and when they did occur I enjoyed his company. I was rather pleased that I had passed thirty as a human so I did not have to act as a teenager for the rest of eternity. Even though he would never admit it, seeing a face older than his own influenced Carlisle's view of me.

I suspected that Jasper also viewed Carlisle as a brother rather than a father. Alice adored the paternal role that Carlisle and Esme occupied in her life so she happily acted as their daughter. I would not have been surprised if Jasper considered himself to be an in-law even after all the years he had been with the family.

Emmett could coexist with a rabid dog so I accepted him as a nephew easily. His antics remained juvenile most of the time so it suited me to be an uncle rather than a brother. I expected him to retaliate for the kiss I had shared with his mate but if he damaged my hammock at all I would have to remove one of his limbs and hide it somewhere


	28. Tanya's Project

**Jackson**

"Jackson!"

The impatient cry of the shortest Vampire I had ever encountered interrupted the meditative state I was enjoying. I tried to ignore her but she climbed up the tree and began swinging my hammock until I was staring at the ground.

I held on easily and opened one eye to watch her.

"Stop pretending to sleep," Alice complained, "There's a family meeting we have to get to."

The last family meeting had been quite interesting. I wondered what had happened now.

"And Jackson, remember that honesty is the best policy," Alice added before jumping back onto the ground.

With a sigh I rolled out of the hammock and landed in a crouch at the base of the tree. Alice could be quite annoying, though Rosalie had assured me that ignoring her advice was never a good idea.

Alice whipped a shopping bag out from behind a tree. I narrowed my eyes at her.

"And yes, there really is a family meeting," Alice grumbled, "But your clothes are all torn and gross. Get changed and be at the house in ten minutes."

The tear that Edward had left in my shirt had been annoying me for hours. I checked what Alice had bought for me, and then ripped off the ruined clothing without regret. I liked green and Alice had avoided ugly patterns.

It was nearly two am by the time I wandered into view of the house. The lights were on in the living room and Carlisle's car was approaching at breakneck speed. He was a terrible driver and Emmett thought that was hilarious.

Edward was playing the piano. Relaxing music floated throughout the house but I could still hear Rosalie muttering about grease under her nails.

Bella beamed at me from her position seated on the couch. I smiled back hesitantly, wondering what I had said or done to deserve such a warm reception.

"I told Bella about our talk," Edward said softly.

"And fight," Bella added pointedly to her mate. He was slightly embarrassed but nothing serious. Bella turned her attention back to me, clearly happy.

"I am glad someone has enough clout to throw my mate on his face and tell him to relax," Bella said, still smiling, "I have tried to do something similar but we always end up getting distracted."

The lust which wisped between them was less welcome than their previous emotions.

"Keep it in check you two," Jasper said as he walked down the stairs. Alice followed with a secretive smile.

"Did I miss a fight?" Emmett complained, "Is that why the driveway was messed up?"

"Uncle Jackson kicked my butt," Edward said without hesitation, "I deserved it and he was kind enough not to bite me."

The faint memory of my nieces would always link the term Uncle with fond memories. Though Edward had been a Vampire longer than me, his physical appearance and reoccurring immaturity made it easy for me to consider him a nephew.

"Uncle Jackson?" Emmett repeated, "That fits pretty well."

I appreciated the pride Jasper was surrounded with. He winked at me with a smile so I knew he was trying to encourage me.

Within minutes Rosalie had reprimanded her mate for trying to initiate something while two Empaths were in the house and then led him downstairs. We gathered expectantly, waiting for Carlisle and Esme to return home.

Carlisle arrived first, surprisingly in one piece. He was surprised to find all of us waiting for him but trusted Alice and her assertion that we were having a meeting.

Esme took her time parking the car and entering the house. Jasper and I sat up straight, alarmed by the sadness and regret which preceded her appearance.

My mind jumped to what could possibly be wrong; had she slipped? Was there a dead human somewhere who would throw the family into chaos? There was no guilt in her emotional profile so I dismissed the possibility in less than a second.

Had we been discovered? No, surely panic would be a key reaction there.

Esme placed her keys on the sideboard at a human pace and entered the room calmly. In one hand she held a newspaper. Carlisle greeted her warmly with a kiss until Emmett complained loudly.

"How can I maintain the delusion that you two never go further than holding hands when you go and do that?" he complained.

Edward allowed the sound of the music to fall silent so he could move to sit next to Bella. He slung an arm around her and they leaned against each other like the teenagers that they were.

Rosalie was watching Edward and Bella with confusion. There was a small amount of concern and a large amount of anticipation which I didn't understand.

"I see Alice has organised the family meeting already," Esme said sadly, "Let's get this over with."

She placed the newspaper on the table where we could all see it. The smiling face of a young male human accompanied the headline announcing his tragic death.

Concern clouded the living room. I glanced around curiously, unsure how the death of one human could affect them all so badly.

"He is the boy from school," Edward explained to me.

The story claimed he had died in a car accident. The coincidence was far too convenient. I remembered how Tanya had mentioned her 'projects'.

Sadness washed over the room. I doubted either Jasper or myself would be able to untangle the source as we were all contributing to it.

I regretted that Tanya had been left in the position to do our dirty work, yet even more annoyed that the boy hadn't been able to control his impulses. She would have only killed him and staged the death if he had attempted to assault her somehow.

"Tanya was efficient," Emmett commented thoughtlessly. Rosalie frowned at him.

"I hate this," Esme declared, "He was someone's son, he was loved."

"And they get to mourn him and pretend that he was a decent person," Rosalie clarified, "I don't like being in this position either but I agree with Jackson and Tanya on this one."

Rosalie waited for Edward to make a callous comment; I could see the expectation in her and the surprise when he remained silent.

"One casualty rather than a lifetime of abusing others," Bella said quietly, "I would rather carry this on my conscience than the guilt of doing nothing."

Carlisle was very conflicted, yet the battle did not show on his face.

"I wish this had ended differently," was all the Coven leader said.

"That boy was not worth feeling guilty over," Jasper said flatly. The harsh expression on his face reminded me of Bella's description of the mask we wore in times of stress.

"Yet we will," I said softly, "And that is why we are better than he was."

**Edward**

I held Bella close as the family meeting broke up. The day had been highly emotional and I needed her comfort more than I realized.

I was not the only one regarded Jackson with awe. The tense, traumatised soldier who had arrived months ago had transformed into the leader he had been. Instead of an army, he was managing the family without even realizing.

Jackson asked Carlisle for a private meeting and for a moment my father considered making up an excuse to avoid it. I was curious why this development would unsettle him.

Bella's shield slipped over my mind without invitation. I glanced down to see my mate watching me with a knowing smirk. I had a nasty habit of eavesdropping out of curiosity rather than necessity and Bella knew it.

I listened to Jackson explain the circumstances of our tussle on the driveway. I couldn't even describe it as a fight in my own mind as he had trounced me so easily.

I tried to leave when Jackson voiced his suspicion that I had been turned too young to function as an adult Vampire but Bella's hand on my shoulder halted the movement. Her serious expression pinned me to the lounge.

I had not shared every aspect of the conversation with Jackson and clearly she was annoyed by the omission.

"I worried about his age until he found Bella," Carlisle admitted, "I assumed the end of his rebellious period in the 1920s was the point where his mind matured past his body."

I wanted Bella to drop the shield so I could read their thoughts but there was no point in arguing with her.

"Would you say that Edward was mature for his age before he was turned?" Jackson asked.

"Definitely."

"Then I theorise that he has never been able to move past that point," Jackson continued, "He will forever be plagued by mood swings and impulsive behaviours for the rest of his existence. He has spent every day since he returned trying to earn your approval because you are the only father he can remember, and he will always compare himself to you."

Carlisle remained silent. I tried to silently beg Bella to drop her shield; she only rolled her eyes at me.

"Surely you can see it is an impossible standard to expect?" Jackson must have known I was still in the house yet he pushed on anyway.

"I don't expect Edward to live my life," Carlisle insisted calmly.

"For all intensive purposes, he is a teenager. Have you assured him that you are incredibly proud of everything he has achieved? Edward has wrestled with depression for as long as Jasper has lived here and I believe much of it is caused by your expectation that he is an equal when he is not. That he was able to control his strength long enough for Bella to survive is amazing when his other traits are considered."

"Edward is my equal," Carlisle argued, "In intelligence, control and everything else that matters."

"But not in physical age," Jackson pointed out, "The family relies far too heavily on his ability to ensure their secrecy and it is a burden that it too much for him. He has created an image of maturity which costs too much to maintain, and he fears that he will lose your approval if he reverts to natural behaviours."

"What could we do to help?" Carlisle asked.

"Letting him overhear this conversation is a start," Jackson said. If I had been human I would have been blushing.

"You need to spend more time with him," he continued, "Now that the mating frenzy has passed you need to rebuild your relationship with Edward based on the knowledge that he will never be more grown up than he is right now."

"He will always be my son," Carlisle murmured.

"He will always depend on you more than anyone else for emotional support and approval. He just needs to know that he is allowed to make mistakes, say stupid things and be impulsive without damaging your respect for him."

"I must admit that as the family has grown my attention has been repeatedly divided. Before you arrived I spent much of my time trying to help Jasper."

"Hopefully Jasper and I have proved that we can support each other? Considering our backgrounds I am surprised that he has lasted this long here; so many emotional profiles in such a close proximity will always remind us of the South," he hesitated and I didn't have to read his mind to know he was reaching the crux of the conversation, "Which is the biggest problem; there are too many Vampire here."

"What do you suggest we do?"

"Sometime in the next few years, the family needs to split," Jackson suggested, "A coven of this size is a threat to the Volturi; the only way to deal with that is to separate into two distinct groups."

"With you leading the new group?" Carlisle guessed.

The shield dropped. Carlisle was seriously worried that Jackson's presence was going to destabilize the family. He was regretting taking in the former soldier.

"I was a general; I don't know anything about leading without a battle to fight. Who better to choose as a leader than your own daughter? Rosalie has the strength and compassion to make you proud."

I snorted aloud at that; shallow, self-absorbed Rosalie as the leader as a family? The idea was ludicrous.

Bella was frowning at me and her disapproval stung. Was I really destined to be trapped in the awkward teenage stage forever?

I craved approval from Carlisle; Jackson was certainly correct about that. Bella was the only one whose opinion mattered more.

Bella took my hand and ushered me out of the house. I quashed the urge to remain so I could continue eavesdropping.


	29. Waiting for Visitors

**Jackson**

I could tell Edward was unsure of himself. He glanced at Bella frequently and gained confidence from the silent exchanges. They were sitting closely but out of respect they were not in physical contact. Esme has been on the warpath about couples getting frisky and leaving clouds of lust around like a minefield Jasper and I had to walk through. At least Jasper could scoop Alice up and retreat somewhere private to give an outlet to the urges.

Alice had warned me more than once that a dose of lust and some privacy with Tanya would ruin our growing friendship. I was destined to suffer in the short-term.

We were sitting in the living room, pretending to be human. Emmett was sitting cross-legged on the floor in the middle of the room with a game controller gently cradled in his giant hands.

"Come on Jasper," Emmett whined, "I need a decent opponent."

"Not now Emmett," Jasper replied from the attic. He was pulling out supplies which would be needed in less than a week.

"Edward," Bella began, "Tell Jackson about our courtship, from your perspective."

Edward was clearly reluctant but clever enough not to argue with his mate. His voice remained soft and monotone. I was interested to learn that he had not realized the mate bond was forming until it was blatantly shoved in his face. I had hoped that story had been exaggerated. The bloodlust and obsession sounded natural, though I had to interrupt not too far into the story.

"You snuck into her room?" I repeatedly incredulously.

His eyes dropped to the floor, "Yes, most of the time."

Surprisingly Bella remained serene.

"Did you rip him a new one when you found out?" I asked her.

She shook her head, "It seemed natural, especially when I knew what he was."

"You were seventeen, he was over a hundred," I mused aloud, "Did no-one point out how creepy it was to break-and-enter?"

"We did," Jasper chimed in.

"Repeatedly," Emmett added. He did not take his eyes off the characters on the screen. "Esme quickly put a stop to the paedophile jokes when we knocked a hole in the wall."

"Expect stalker urges," I sighed, "So noted."

"Not really a stalker," Edward argued weakly, "And that wall was your fault Emmett."

Jasper and Emmett didn't try to hide their laughter.

"You were stalking me sweetheart," Bella clarified, "What choice did you have? If I had been a Vampire already we would have been lovers within a few days. Even Carlisle marvels at your self-control."

"The instinct to weld yourself to your mate's side is strong," Jasper admitted heavily, "From a human perspective, yes, it is identical to being a creepy stalker. From a Vampire perspective it is perfectly natural and a painful instinct to deny."

"I was stupid," Edward said firmly, "A complete stubborn idiot for making decisions for you." He spoke to Bella directly and their mating bond shimmered. I suspected the conversation between them would continue once they were alone.

"For leaving, that description is accurate," Bella conceded, "Though your motives were honourable, your actions were moronic."

"Expect moronic behaviour," I added to my internal list.

"You're not as uptight as Eddy," Emmett said while his character shot at something, "Hopefully you will listen to reason."

"Don't call me that," Edward muttered.

"Don't count on him being reasonable," Jasper laughed from upstairs, "He's a Whitlock."

"According to Alice, we have at least a couple of years before your mate shows up," Edward revealed.

A couple of years? I was annoyed at having to wait, yet oddly relieved that I had time to prepare. I doubted I would be able to do anything more than hold hands until my mate was turned, even with time to tame my instincts.

"In the meantime, it has been nearly six months since you arrived."

I raised an eyebrow at the telepath. He was stating the obvious, which I found annoying.

"The 'Edward is a Stalker' conversation can continue another day," Jasper said. His voice was closer and his footsteps were bringing him toward us.

"Yeah," Emmett agreed, "He doesn't get to change the subject that easily."

"Renesmee and the Pack will be returning in a few days," Edward said, visibly irritated.

"Renesmee doesn't smell like food," Bella explained to me, "But her scent is not Vampire either. Jacob will be very protective to be careful not to make any vaguely threatening moves near her."

"You can threaten Jacob though," Jasper laughed as he carried a pile of blankets and pillows down the stairs.

"Leave Leah and Seth alone though," Emmett laughed, "Seth is a good kid."

"And Leah?" I asked.

I watched the Vampires glance at each other. Even Emmett tore his gaze off the screen.

"Leah is miserable," Jasper said flatly, "Becoming a shifter ruined her life. She blames us, yet she has to spend half the year with us."

I could understand the frustration and isolation of the only female shifter. I hoped I would get used to the smell so I could get her perspective on the oddness of the Cullen family.

"Emily had another baby last year," Bella added. I was startled by the name, which earned a raised eyebrow from Jasper.

Bella quickly summarised who Emily was and why her growing family would always antagonize Leah. I tried to imagine how Leah felt. She didn't belong anywhere, and was constantly surrounded by reminders of the happiness she was denied. I doubted I would be anything but bitter in her position.

"It's a shame she didn't imprint on the male hybrid," I mused.

"Her hatred of Vampires would have been an issue," Edward said.

"Did she even look at him?" Bella wondered, "And she was a wolf at the time; don't they need to be human to imprint?"

The shrill ring of a mobile phone made Jasper laugh. Clearly he was not surprised that his mate's name flashed up on the screen of the phone Edward was pulling out of his pocket.

"Nessie and her dog are not staying in my cabin," Emmett grumbled at Jasper, not interested in the phone conversation.

"Settle down," Jasper replied, "They're using ours. Alice plans to bleach it and redecorate after they leave."

"You're not getting your room back," I pointed out.

"Hello Alice," Edward greeted with boredom, "Enjoy your visions for now before they are blocked for six months."

"I'm going to ring Nahuel, he will want to meet Leah. I can't see what will happen but the blurry parts mean he will definitely make the trip."

"Why can't she see?" I asked Bella.

Bella shrugged, "We're not sure. When I was pregnant Alice struggled to see me. The Wolves are totally invisible."

Edward hung up the phone, "Carlisle has a theory about it. Alice was human and is now a Vampire. Her mind has no experience being a hybrid or a wolf."

I still found it strange. If Alice could see humans and Vampires, why would she be blind to a mixture of the two?

"Maybe she could never see Renesmee properly because she was destined for Jacob?" I hypothesized.

Bella shrugged, "Maybe."

"He was always far too interested in Bella," Edward grumbled, "For all we know he was stalking her ovaries."

Jasper finished a second trip outside. Emmett waved the spare controller at him.

"You play him Edward," Jasper instructed the telepath, "It will take your mind off your future son-in-law and ovaries."

"I'll shield him," Bella interjected as Emmett complained about cheating.

"Maybe Jacob was destined for Bella's daughter, not matter who the father was," I said, "Assuming it wasn't him."

"Gross," Jasper offered.

"Has Alice tried biting Renesmee?" I asked.

"Of course not," Edward snapped. Bella was distressed by the very thought.

"Vampires are all about blood, it is a valid suggestion," Jasper agreed. Bella narrowed her eyes at him.

"It would be her decision," I said, seriously wondering if a tussle would break out.

"Alice is welcome to bite Jacob," Edward offered, "But the smell at such a close range might make her throw up."

"I love Seth like a brother but damn he stinks," Emmett laughed.

"Seth was quite young when he shifted," Jasper explained, no doubt sensing my curiosity, "We smell awful to him but there is no hostility."

"If Nahuel is coming for a visit, we should get him to introduce Seth to his sisters," Emmett suggested, "Three sisters should triple his chances of imprinting."

"If he imprints but Leah doesn't there will be hell to pay," Bella warned.

"Maybe she already imprinted," Emmett said hopefully, "The rest of the Pack has stopped shifting and most have a kid or two by now."

"It's too bad that Emily is her cousin," Jasper said with a smile, "How funny would it have been is she imprinted on her ex's kid?"

"I didn't find it funny," Bella replied flatly.

"If it hadn't been us, it would have been amusing," Edward said.

"If they didn't stink it would have been hilarious," Emmett added, "The look on your face was priceless Bells."

"The memory of you throwing him into the forest is a cherished one," Jasper admitted.

I was enjoying the pleasant atmosphere they were generating. Other than the motherly anxiety Bella was emitting, all the emotions were soothing.

I wasn't looking forward to meeting anyone new, let alone stinky shifters who instinctively wanted to kill me. Renesmee sounded interesting, especially as I had never met a hybrid before. If she could keep the pungent in-laws in line I would be quite impressed.

Jasper was watching me with a secretive smile. I suspected he knew exactly what I was thinking.

"How did you survive all the drama?" I asked him.

He shrugged, "I went hunting more than was necessary. I avoided Edward and Bella as much as possible too."

"Who was worse?"

Curiosity was thick in the air. Bella waited for the answer expectantly. Edward watched Jasper too, which gave Emmett the opportunity to shoot his character.

"Edward was definitely the worst," Jasper revealed, "Bella was anxious, horny or both for the most part but he changed moods every few minutes. No-one lives under a cloud of self-doubt like Edward."

"All perfectly natural," Bella pointed out with a frown.

"Very natural," Emmett agreed, "When are the girls due home?" The lust creeping along his aura was alarming.

"Emmett, control yourself or go far, far away," Jasper snapped.

"Spoilsport."

"I heard that Rosalie kissed Jackson," Bella teased, "If you douse him with sexual tension you might tempt her."

The lust abruptly vanished. I refrained from making a joke about not liking threesomes so he would miss out but I held my tongue.

Emmett glared at Bella and muttered about her devious tactics.

Edward shot Emmett's character with a triumphant laugh.

********************************************************************************************The snow was so thick that I had to dig a tunnel to reach my hammock. I inspected the frozen, fraying ropes and decided to ask Alice to order a few new ones.

Esme had banned any sexual activity in the house but since the snow did not stop randy couples from getting busy I did not linger near my tree house just in case.

I was wiping the snow out of my hair when the crunch of footsteps tugged at the edge of my hearing. Esme would not be happy with me dripping onto her carpet but I remained in place.

Tanya ploughed through the snow as the sun was setting. Carlisle was still at the hospital, I was not sure where everyone else was.

"Love the tunnel," Tanya greeted with a smile, "You should see my underground bunker one day."

Out of respect for the clean house and dry furniture we headed for showers. I was grateful that there were multiple bathrooms in the vast Cullen house so I did not have to sit around thinking about Tanya wet and naked.

Tanya borrowed some of the spare clothes Alice left handy. With a smile Tanya recalled how she had borrowed Rosalie's clothes without permission once and had been in the bad books for months.

I cuddled up with Tanya on the couch. I liked holding her in my arms, safe in the knowledge that the lines of friendship were clear and uncrossed. We could enjoy the intimacy free of expectations. I still considered Edward a martyr for not allowing any of his family to simply hold him all those years.

Tanya was sad, which made her less talkative than usual. I let her brood silently while I slowly chipped away at the mood.

We slipped into the Vampire version of rest, where our minds narrowed the focus to a single activity or train of thought. I passed many nights relaxing with Tanya and thoroughly enjoyed the experience.


	30. Jacob and Renesmee

**Jackson**

I was nervous and I couldn't stop the emotions from leaking around me like an overflowing fountain. The rest of the family gave me a wide birth as the minutes ticked by. I had less than ten minutes to compose myself before the Pack arrived.

I leaned against a tree at the edge of the forest, letting the bark press into my skin as a silent reassurance that my back was not vulnerable.

Rosalie rose from her seated position on the front steps, her skin soft and alluring in the dim daylight of an Alaskan winter. She approached me without hesitation, prompting curiosity from most of the family.

Jasper took a step toward me, only to be stopped by his mate. Alice spoke to him softly enough that I could not hear her words.

Rosalie stopped in front of me, her eyes trained on my anxious face. I met her gaze, desperately trying to focus ground myself in her presence to hold back the panic.

An army of approaching newborns had stirred similar reactions from me in my earliest years. I had taken refuge in routine, orders and tactical planning. Here I had none of that; only the knowledge that four unknown creatures were approaching and if I had to defend myself from any of them I would face the anger of the entire Cullen family too.

I wanted to run but I was no coward. Even if I had been encouraged to leave by Carlisle himself I would have held my ground.

Rosalie reached forward to touch my face. I hissed instinctively before I could stop myself. Within a second Jasper was by her side.

"You two are amplifying each other," Rosalie said firmly, "Unless you know how to diffuse this?"

Jasper watched me and I could see the concern around both of them.

Rosalie sighed, "You two can handle anything except each other. Fine."

Alice giggled.

"Attention soldiers!" Rosalie bellowed. Jasper and I stood up straight automatically, our eyes locked on her. It had to be a comical picture.

"Major! The party approaching is smelly but not hostile. Remain in place and face the newcomers. Captain! You are to remain behind us until you have sampled the emotional climate. We will step aside only when we determine that the situation is safe. Is that clear?"

"Yes ma'am," Jasper and I intoned together.

Rosalie gripped Jasper's shoulders to move him into place in front of me and slightly to the right. She stood shoulder-to-shoulder next to him so my view of the driveway was completely blocked.

"At ease soldiers," Rosalie added; the authority in her voice as strong as I had ever heard from Maria.

I leaned back against the tree to further obscure my view. Apparently the Alpha wolf, Jacob, was quite tall. I wanted to analyse his emotional state before I had to consider his size.

All too soon the crunch of car wheels on gravel heralded the arrival of Bella, Edward and their daughter Renesmee. One or more of the wolves could have decided to run from the airport as there was not enough room in the car for everyone.

Bella was nervous. Edward was curious. There were two others in the car, which meant two of the wolves were unaccounted for.

The joy which blossomed around Rosalie was very interesting; emotionally she considered Renesmee her daughter. I assumed she was looking at Renesmee as I couldn't imagine her wanting to adopt the wolf.

The smell hit me in the face like a truck. A decomposing whale stuffed up my nostrils with the force of a crane could not have had more of an effect.

I slid down the tree while choking, desperate to spit out the horrid stench coating the inside of my nose and mouth.

"You get used to the smell after a while," Jasper offered.

"Liar," Rosalie snorted, "Being able to hide the disgust does not qualify as getting used to it."

A deep cough from the unfamiliar male preceded a retching sound, "Damn, the bleach smell just gets worse every year," he said loudly, "It's worse than last year somehow."

"Behave!" Renesmee snapped. As the only female voice I wasn't familiar with, I knew it had to be her.

"There's a new brand of flea shampoo you could try," Rosalie offered sweetly.

"It's lovely to see you again Blondie!" Jacob boomed, "Leah has been really grumpy of late; she needs some girl time with you."

Rosalie snorted, "You should stop annoying her. The sooner you realize she is in charge the better."

Rosalie wanted to hug Renesmee; the longing was too strong for anything else. Despite the smell of her mate the emotional focus of the family had shifted to the hybrid.

"Is the new Vamp scared of me?" Jacob asked hopefully.

I rolled my eyes and accepted that the awful stench was not something I could escape. I stood up slowly, my pride insisting that I remain and face the creature who made me want to retch.

"Actually we're worried that you will be so terrified of him that you attack," Rosalie responded snidely, "And he would kick your smelly butt."

"Maybe I should be introduced first?" Renesmee suggested. Jacob tried to argue but she shut him down with admirable efficiency.

Jasper blocked my view of the wolf while Rosalie turned to allow the hybrid to see me. Renesmee sucked in a breath in shock as she was the scar on my face. Her fear receded when Jasper and I flooded the area with calm but Jacob remained tense.

"Nessie, this is Uncle Jackson," Rosalie introduced smoothly, "Jackson, this is our beloved Nessie. Her taste in men is awful but other than that she is pretty great."

I nodded my head toward her, "It is lovely to meet you Renesmee," I said politely. I wasn't going to presume to use her nickname until she gave me permission to do so.

"Hi Jackson," her eyes roamed over me and her curiosity grew, "You look so much like Jasper."

Jasper explained the family link between us. Rosalie took the opportunity to hug her niece in welcome.

"Now we have to make sure your pet wolf doesn't overreact," Rosalie teased.

"I'm more worried about the smell," Jacob commented, "Bleach in my nostrils would improve the odour around here."

"Are you aware that your mate smells like a wet dog decomposing in a garbage dump?" I asked the hybrid seriously.

Renesmee giggled, "I am the only one with no smell issues in this family."

"Are you ready Jacob?" Jasper asked seriously.

"Whatever."

As encouraging as that was I remained still and kept my hands clasped behind my back in a military posture. Behind Renesmee, Edward smiled at me encouragingly which only increased my apprehension.

Jasper stepped aside just enough for the wolf to see my face. The thunderous growl which exploded from Jacob did not sound remotely human.

"Jakey!" Renesmee admonished. The growling faded in volume.

"I applaud your restraint," Jasper offered Jacob, "Garrett was petrified by the image Jackson and I presented. I am impressed that you did not phase."

Renesmee backed away from me and I could see Jacob's anxiety lessen with each step she took. Their bond was deep and dictated their actions.

Edward sighed, "That is very insulting Jacob."

Jacob shrugged, "I didn't say it aloud did I?"

"A crude nickname for Jasper is bad enough, why do you have to apply one to Jackson too?" Alice chimed in.

"What is your nickname Jasper?" I asked curiously.

Wisps of amusement drifted around the Empath, "Major Bitemark."

I could not contain my laughter. Jacob stared at me in amazement.

"Jasper and Jackson are the two most feared soldiers of the Southern Wars," Edward explained, "Vampires have been known to flee the battlefield if they hear a rumour that a Whitlock will be leading the charge. Had anyone used such an insult then they would have been begging for death before the end of the sentence."

Jacob eyed the two of us thoughtfully but remained silent. Renesmee moved back to his side, "If you give Jackson a nickname he can call you something insulting too," she pointed out.

"I allow 'Major Bitemark' because it mentions my rank, and I enjoy calling Jacob the Mutt," Jasper explained.

"I was a Captain," I offered.

"You know 'Captain Scarface' has a nice ring to it," Jacob mused.

My laughter startled the birds in the forest into flight. Jasper chuckled with more dignity but the general amusement spread to everyone.

"I'd better phase," Jacob announced, "So Leah and Seth know what to expect."

He pulled his shirt off and threw it at his mate. I was not the only one to make a sound of disgust as he reached for his pants.

"Take it to the forest Mutt," Rosalie ordered, "This is not a nudist colony."

The emotional climate of the whole family changed around Renesmee. I watched in fascination as she returned from a tour of the cabin she would be occupying with her mate. Contentment flowed through the other family members as though the hybrid was influencing all of them.

Yet clearly she had no such power other than her smile; and it was a smile which was clearly familiar. I could see her mother in her face and her father in her hair and posture. I nearly snorted aloud at the thought of Jacob looking at his mate and seeing Edward, even for a brief moment.

Jacob was streaking through the forest on four paws. Emmett had made a crass comment about the shape-shifter choking on Vampire scents and lifting his leg on every tree. Renesmee was close enough to deliver a short cuff to the back of his head, which saved Rosalie the trouble.

I wanted to retreat to my hammock but the prospect of two unknown wolves bearing down on me did not sit well. I remained in the bedroom Alice was not going to reclaim unless she wanted me to wear the same clothes for a month.

The prospect of being blind to the future for six months weighed heavily on her mind yet the holiday Jasper had suggested didn't reassure her.

I decided to mention my hypothesis between blood and her visions. Jacob was far enough away for a flash of the future to reach her.

Edward growled from the living room. He reminded me of a puppy even though I knew he was serious and could cause some damage if he really wanted to.

I glanced at my arm and amended my thought; if he managed to get his teeth into me the scar would be lost before it formed.

"Not now," Edward said firmly.

I rolled my eyes as the curiosity billowed from every Vampire in the house. For someone so intelligent he really was stupid sometimes.

"What has ruined your mood Dad?" Renesmee asked.

I admired her bluntness even as I realized how awful the consequences could be. If she had grown up with Vampire-like hearing while her parents were in the mating frenzy she would have no shortage of nightmarish tales to share. I wondered if she could get drunk or if her biology prevented it.

"You're weird Jackson," Edward commented from downstairs.

"Jackson has a theory about the holes in Alice's visions," Jasper said.

With a sigh I put down the book I had been reading and headed toward the living room at a human pace. If there was going to be any violence due to my idea I was going to make sure the damage was minimal.

"It is a ridiculous theory which does not need to be repeated," Edward replied harshly.

"Jackson wondered if your blood could be the key," Jasper said to Renesmee, "If Alice were to bite you, would she be able to see you?"

The growl from Bella was more intimidating than any I had heard from Edward. I settled myself near Jasper and Alice as Rosalie and Emmett entered the house to join the conversation.

"Try it on Jacob," Rosalie suggested to Alice, "Be careful to hold back the venom and hold your nose so you don't throw up."


	31. The Pack

**Jackson**

Carlisle arrived home before hostilities broke out. Without the use of our talents Jasper and I had managed to piss off Bella and Edward just by looking smug. It was juvenile and Rosalie clearly did not approve, but we did not let that stop us. It was easy to understand why Emmett enjoyed teasing Edward so much; there were so many prime opportunities.

Bella was not as sensitive as Edward except when her daughter was the topic of conversation. Her irritation grew slowly like a kettle on a slow boil.

Alice and Renesmee watched each other thoughtfully. I was sure that no matter what opinions her parents put forth Renesmee would want to see if my theory had any merit. Alice had previously described the pain which she endured when he visions were partially obscured and the danger of the Volturi choosing to ambush the family while her talent was incapacitated.

The atmosphere irritated me too much to remain for long. I headed outside and scaled the large tree in the front yard.

Winter was slowly giving way to spring, though it had put up a valiant struggle. Once again I was grateful that I was not affected by the cold.

The large dark-brown wolf I recognised as Jacob moved through the forest with supernatural grace. For a canine the size of a horse he was very quiet.

The smell hung in the air, as strong as before. By accepting that I could not get away from it I was able to tolerate it more.

The stench was the first warning that these creatures were dangerous; a primal warning sign that set me on alert instinctively. Even if the smell was somehow absent, the way they moved screamed danger and death to any Vampire who spotted them.

A grey flash announced the arrival of a second wolf. I wondered if the smell would double even though I could not imagine it getting any worse.

The smaller grey wolf trotted out of the forest with its eyes on me. There was a challenge there which I didn't appreciate.

The front door opened and Edward walked out. He smiled at the wolf, though it was undermined by the annoyance in his aura.

"Welcome back Leah," he said politely, "This is Jackson. Jackson, this is Leah."

"Hello ma'am," I greeted automatically.

The curiosity around the wolf faded quickly. Other emotions were fleeting under the onslaught of a thick wave of depression which rolled over her.

"Esme has restocked the cupboards with fresh clothes, and Alice is still keen to take you shopping," Edward continued.

Leah snorted and I hoped Edward would vocalise her response.

"I'm sorry Leah, I wish I could help," he continued, "Please know that we consider you family; you will always have a home with us."

The emotions were strong but fleeting. Leah ran back into the forest without a backward glance.

"Mind readers are annoying," I pointed out.

"Apparently."

He disappeared back inside the house without explaining the other side of the conversation with Leah. I listened to the voices inside the house even as I watched the forest.

"The Elders have asked the Pack not to return," Edward told the family, "Now that everyone else has stopped phasing, the presence of four people who do not age is causing problems."

"That is so unfair," Esme said. I could hear the annoyance in her voice.

"They're always worried that my presence could keep the phasing gene active," Renesmee added, "They never get the urge to phase when we're absent, but when we come back Sam said it's like getting an itch that no-one can scratch."

"It sounds like an excuse to me," Rosalie huffed, "They used the Pack when they were needed and now want nothing to do with them."

"Embry was so pissed at their decision that he decided to come back with us," Renesmee added, "Jacob wanted it to be a surprise, but with a new Vampire around it's a stupid idea to keep secrets."

I gripped the branch of the tree harder than was necessary. Four wolves? We might as well open up a kennel.

"I'll start work on another cabin!" Esme decided, "We need to make it clear that our doors are wide open, the Pack has a home here."

The conversation turned back to Alice and her struggle to see around the wolves. Renesmee agreed to donate some blood for Alice to drink. Edward and Bella were annoyed but as long as Alice wouldn't actually be biting their daughter they were not protesting.

Two more wolves appeared deep in the forest. They sniffed the tree with my hammock in it for a few long seconds while I glared at them through narrowed eyes. If either one lifted their leg on my tree I would not be responsible for my actions.

Edward arrived in a gust of wind. He smiled up at me apologetically.

"I swear I'm not trying to annoy you," he said, "It's either me translating what they say or dealing with naked men."

"Ew."

"They prefer to have a good sniff around before shifting and it would be rude not to introduce you."

Rude manners were the last of my worries. I silently asked what Embry was like.

"Similar to Jacob; he enjoys being a wolf for the most part. He wishes he would hurry up and imprint but that's about it. He has a degree in Business Management and considered moving off the Reservation to pursue a career. It's a shame he didn't imprint on Leah really."

"She's so depressed," I revealed softly.

"Her anger is fading," Edward agreed, "It seemed healthier than the misery."

The two wolves finished inhaling whatever was on the tree and crept toward the house.

"Seth is the sandy-coloured wolf with the patch of brown on his back. Embry is the huge grey one with the black spots."

Embry was larger than Seth by less than a hand-span. They were both more massive than Leah by a significant margin.

"No Seth," Edward said abruptly, "Please fetch come clothes first."

With the wolf equivalent of a snigger Seth ran toward the cabin where Jacob already was. Embry watched Edward with curiosity before his eyes drifted up to me. The alarm swept over him immediately.

"Hi Embry," I said in a monotone voice, "Love the spots."

He blinked at me in surprise before darting away after Seth.

"Emmett wants to call him a Dalmatian," Edward said with a smile.

Jacob didn't even reach the driveway before panic set in.

"Nessie is bleeding!" he bellowed before he raced into the house.

Embry and Seth were not far behind and they were still carrying their shirts in their hands. Didn't anyone notice the snow on the ground anymore?

I could have told them that Renesmee was donating blood for Alice to taste; instead I silently congratulated them on controlling the desire to phase and rip the Cullen house apart.

"Settle down Jacob," Esme snapped with surprising authority, "Nessie is in no danger; she doesn't smell like food to any of us."

While the theory behind the blood donation was being explained I remain in the tree. Leah walked slowly to the tree line and regarded the house with sad eyes. Her dress had numerous loose threads at the bottom and grass stains liberally smeared on it. Alice would have a fit if she saw anyone wearing clothes in such a condition.

I wanted to help her. After years of conditioning to keep my head down and my mouth shut I was glad the instinct to assist others was still alive.

I dropped down to the ground, directly into her line of sight. Her lean frame was not disguised by the shabby clothing; she was compact muscle yet distinctly feminine. I admired her long legs and perfectly proportioned breasts before I could stop myself.

Leah glared at me but held her ground. I admired her bravery.

"Good afternoon Leah," I said quietly.

"Hi."

She was nervous and her sharp eyes could not miss the scar on my left cheek.

"Do you like to share Jacob's nickname for Jasper?" I asked curiously.

Amusement hung in the air like wisps of water vapour, "Sometimes, but I'm not crazy enough to call him 'Major Bitemark' to his face."

I smiled just enough to keep her attention, "Jacob christened me 'Captain Scarface' if that helps."

She clapped her hand over her mouth to hold in the laughter. The snorting sound she made was quite cute.

"You should laugh more often," I said, "It suits you."

I walked toward her slowly and with each step the amusement faded.

"Don't try any of your Vampire tricks on me," she warned, "I may look like the weak target in this Pack but - "

"Weak?" I repeated incredulously, "Hardly."

"My wolf form is slightly smaller because I'm a female."

"My sire is a female," I revealed, "And she could be utterly terrifying. I have learned never to underestimate a woman."

"Did she give you the scar on your cheek?"

Her bravery astounded me; no-one else had ever gathered the courage to ask me that.

"Yes she did. When I began a relationship with another Vampire she destroyed her and left me with this scar to make sure no-one else would risk even smiling at me. I resigned myself to never being happy."

Leah sighed, "It's the price of being a freak I guess."

"No-one should have to be miserable," I said, "Being an Empath, I can help everyone else except myself."

Suspicion clouded around her, "Who sent you out here to talk to me?" she asked, "I'm allowed to be miserable if I want to, so keep your powers to yourself."

"No-one sent me and I am not using my talent on you at all. I can see the depression threatening to smother you and it saddens me that a woman as brave as you is suffering."

She shrugged, "Shit happens."

I smiled at her blunt statement, which only increased her curiosity about me.

The front door slammed open behind me. I stepped to the side so I could see Leah and the approaching wolves without exposing my back to any of them.

"Are you alright Leah?" Embry asked cautiously.

I was not surprised that he distrusted me but I was not expecting the tinge of jealously either. Embry clearly had feelings for Leah beyond the bounds of friendship.

Seth was worried and rightly so; I was a dangerous stranger even among talented Vampires.

"I'm fine," Leah replied easily. The annoyance and frustration I could see around her were not evident in her tone.

"Do you want to come in for some food?" Seth invited, "Esme is cooking up a storm."

Leah glanced at me while I read her emotions with interest. She was reluctant to approach the house, and equally unimpressed with the prospect of continuing her conversation with me.

"I guess."

I watch her as she slowly walked past me toward the house. Embry and Seth stared at me menacingly even after Leah had brushed by them.

"Have you been with the Cullen's long?" Seth enquired politely.

"Six months," I replied easily.

"Are you leaving any time soon?" Embry asked. Seth frowned at him and made an odd grumbling noise.

"Not likely," I informed them, "It is far too interesting to leave."

"Don't get any ideas about Leah," Embry warned me, "Even if she wasn't waiting to imprint, she's not interested in Vampires."

Embry turned his back on me and followed the scent of food before I could reply. Seth watched him go with a scowl.

"Is he always so grumpy?" I asked Seth.

Seth shrugged, "Sometimes."

"I have no evil plans regarding your sister," I reassured him, "Though I would have been relieved had she imprinted on me, I am content with a possible friendship."

"You wanted her to imprint on you?" Seth asked curiously.

"What is the point of eternity if it is shrouded in loneliness?"


	32. Leah

**Jackson**

The appearance of the sun was a welcome change. I was studying my hammock with dismay when Alice stopped under my tree with a large package in her small hands.

"Hello Alice," I greeted cautiously. She was either holding a replacement hammock or a new outfit; and I knew which one I was hoping for.

"Good evening Jackson."

The main ropes had suffered in the extreme cold; I suspected one or more would break if I tried to put any weight on them.

"You've been keeping yourself busy over the past week," Alice observed coyly.

Since the Pack had arrived I had thrown myself into whittling with renewed gusto. I was working on a bear for Rosalie which had Emmett's facial features.

"Even Bella commented on your frequent absences, and she is usually too wrapped up in Edward and Renesmee to notice much," Alice continued.

"I'm taking my time adjusting to the smell," I admitted.

Alice grinned, "That will take months, especially if you keep avoiding everyone."

The family had changed since the Pack had arrived; the peace I enjoyed was still there but there was more excitement in the area. It was irritating.

"I have plenty of time to adjust," I countered, "They're staying here permanently as far as I heard."

"Actually they're going to live in the area, but not under our feet. They are as grossed out by our smell as we are by theirs."

"Are you disappointed that the blood donation didn't help your visions?" I asked to change the direction of the conversation.

Alice frowned and she could not hide the annoyance, "Yes, but Jacob has agreed to donate later today, which will probably make me throw up."

"Aim for the nearest wolf," I advised, "It might improve the smell."

"I have a present for you," Alice said, her smile returning as it always did. I savoured the sensation of her excitement washing over me.

"Please tell me that it's a hammock," I pleaded.

She smiled, "It's a hammock."

I jumped to the ground with a grin.

"And some new clothes."

The evil little pixie would not leave until I took the clothes as well as the hammock. She held the hammock hostage until I returned from behind a tree in the new clothes. I didn't even have time to replace my old hammock before she was dragging me back toward the house while nattering something about Carlisle and Jasper.

"Do dogs howl when you talk at that pitch?" I asked Alice, "Or do bats just fall out of the sky?"

"What happened to the gentleman who arrived here six months ago?" Alice sighed as the house came into view.

"I didn't see him; maybe he ran away when I showed up."

The faint scent of hospital antiseptics allowed me to identify Carlisle easily. He dropped his car keys in the bowl near the front door and smiled at Alice and I indulgently.

"I assume Alice has explained the plan to you already Jackson?"

"Not at all," I replied easily, "I figure if I cooperate she won't rip any of my limbs off."

"I'll change my clothes and meet you and Jasper in the living room."

Jasper was already waiting. He was slouched on the lounge staring out the window thoughtfully.

"Carlisle is very impressed with the control that the two of you have demonstrated over the past few months," Alice revealed happily, "He's going to take you guys for a drive through some heavily populated areas."

"That sounds incredibly stupid," I replied heavily.

"That's what I said," Jasper agreed.

"Who else is coming?" I asked.

"Me," Alice said with a smile.

"Alice, if either of us decide to kill a human you won't be able to stop us," I pointed out, "What if we both lose control?"

"Edward, Emmett, Rosalie and Bella will be close enough to intervene," Alice conceded, "Why won't anyone believe me? Neither of you will snap."

Jasper's pessimism reflected my own. I had observed the improvements in his control since I had arrived but I had little confidence in my own.

After two hours of smelling delicious humans Jasper and I were both exhausted and seriously nauseous. Even without blasting each other with disgust, our bodies were anticipating the sensation. I felt terrible even as my theory was proved correct.

"Next time Carlisle enrols us at a high school you can go in to register half the family," Alice chirped, "We can claim Rosalie, Jasper and Bella are a different family living in a different house."

Jasper was filled with dread, and he was not the only one.

"Why do you even bother?" I asked, "Why not skip to college at least?"

"The younger we start out, the longer we can stay," Alice explained, "That way Carlisle can spend time as a doctor rather than a student."

"Often Edward attends college and medical school in Carlisle's name so he can begin the next life in a hospital and bypass the rest," Jasper added.

"You suffer badly around horny teenagers," I pointed out to Jasper, "Why do you keep returning?"

"Partially for Alice, but also for my control," Jasper admitted, "Being exposed to human scents five days a week keeps me on my toes; after holidays or a move the first day back is dangerous."

"I still think college would have the same affect," I said.

Jasper shrugged. I suspected he would follow Alice to the gates of hell and beyond; high school fell into that category.

"I only attend two years, as Jazz can only attend one. We don't want to put up with crap about our age difference."

Wisps of amusement from Jasper piqued my curiosity, which he clearly picked up.

"Once we were accused of breaking the law because I was eighteen and Alice was sixteen," Jasper revealed, "Married for decades and they want to arrest me; stupid humans."

"We also have to be careful that Rosalie is at least seventeen because Emmett can't pass for any younger than eighteen," Alice added.

"How old does Carlisle start out?"

"As young as twenty; Esme a couple of years older. We can stretch our time in one place if we use make-up to add age lines after a few years," Alice continued, "We don't risk more than ten years though."

"I take care of all the documents," Jasper sighed, "It is getting harder as technology advances."

"So when do I have to go to school to sign you up for torture?" I wondered aloud.

"We'll probably move again next year," Alice was smiling again. I did not understand what she found so enjoyable among adolescent humans.

"Carlisle will definitely have to move; even staying in the area could be risky. He can't risk make-up if he's performing surgery," Jasper was no longer watching Alice or I; his eyes lingered on the forest behind us.

"I hope this blood plan works," Alice grumbled, "I hate not being able to see."

The smell hit me as the wind shifted direction. I coughed before I could control myself; at least I hadn't retched.

"All went well?" Renesmee asked as she sauntered onto the driveway. Jacob was not far behind.

"Great," Alice replied happily, "Not a single problem."

"The scent of human blood is beginning to make us feel sick," Jasper agreed, "Not as bad as the scent of the Pack though."

"Good," Jacob replied with a smile, "The Vampire stench still makes us want to rip out our ability to smell and bury it somewhere under the ocean."

I could not see another wolf beyond the tree line, though I knew another one was present. The emotional signature belonged to Leah.

"Let's get this over with," Jacob said to Alice, "I hope it works; the idea of letting you bite me still gives me the creeps."

They headed into the house still discussing the potential is the experiment worked. I heard them greet Esme, who was trialling a new career Bella had suggested. She carried her mobile phone with her at all times in case someone called the domestic abuse hotline she covered. After decades of funding shelters for women fleeing violent homes it was a natural progression.

I pretended I did not know how close Leah was. I walked past my treehouse toward the river. At a human pace it took me nearly half an hour to reach the place where I had gone swimming. I heard multiple indications that I was being followed.

Instead of getting wet I sat down on a steady rock so I could contemplate the water flowing past me. I fought the impulse to turn to face Leah as she approached me.

She sat down near me and stared at the water too. Her lovely black hair brushed her shoulders and fluttered in the breeze.

"The beautiful wolf followed the ugly Vampire to the edge of the river," I narrated blandly, "Despite his horrible stench she sits down beside him without gagging."

The edges of a smile tugged at her lips, "You're not ugly," was all she said.

"I thought your eyesight was nearly as good as mine," I commented, "To other Vampires I am hideous."

Leah finally turned her head to look at the scar on my cheek directly. Unlike others who could see it she didn't drop her gaze once she knew she was being observed. She was not intimidated and I admired that about her.

"Would you rather look 'pretty' like Edward?" she asked with a smirk.

"Perhaps not," I admitted. I recalled how the telepath had commented on the repeated assumption that he was attracted to men.

"Those two are made for each other," Leah declared.

"Bella and Edward?"

"Of course. At least Bella has the excuse of being rather young; after living for over a century Edward has no excuse for lacking depth."

"What about the rest of the family?" I asked curiously, "I find your observations to be quite interesting."

Leah pulled her legs up so she could wrap her arms around her knees and rest her chin on them.

"Alice is as annoying as hell; who is that bloody happy all the damn time? At least Jasper shuts up long enough to let others get a word in. I like the scars really; they prove that Vampires cannot morph into the Brady Bunch no matter how hard they try."

"Rosalie and Emmett are okay most of the time but I swear every time I see them they are two seconds away from screwing. Most than once I have busted them in the forest and they don't even stop. They think we're gross for peeing on trees but the smell they leave behind could kill the local wildlife."

"Carlisle is just too perfect; he never loses his temper or swears. I can't take him seriously. Esme is pretty similar, I sometimes wonder if she was the inspiration behind the stepford movie."

I chuckled. Even though her opinions were rather harsh there was an element of truth there.

"I love her cooking; damn I think that's why I keep coming back. Even though she's too nice, I like that she can show affection to someone as bitchy as me."

Her voice broke and I could smell the salty tang of her tears. The misery surged forward past the barriers Leah had erected to keep it at bay.

"Can I hug you Leah?" I asked quietly.

She nodded even as she tried to hide her face behind her hair. She released her knees and allowed me to pull her onto my lap. Her sobs clawed at my chest; the physical contact heightened my gift to the extreme.

I held her for nearly an hour. The tears slowed and the misery within her lessened slightly. The surge of anger baffled me.

"I hate being weak," Leah hissed, "Usually I can keep it inside. Are you doing something?"

"I swear I am not."

"None of the other Vampires get me to open up, let alone cry all over their shirts," she complained, "Not even Major Bitemark."

"You are not weak Leah," I soothed, "You are brave enough to let out the pain and face the loneliness. I can already see the misery is not as heavy as it was when you arrived."

"Why are you different though?" she leaned back to look at my face clearly.

"I'm not sure. It could be the Empathy; it could be our shared isolation. Maybe it is even more poetic than that; you are scarred on the inside while I bear the scars on the outside."

"We're as screwed up as each other?" she surmised.

"Something like that."

Leah froze in place, her gaze fixed to a point beyond my shoulder.

"Wow, you move fast Jackson. How many girls do you need to cuddle with anyway?" Tanya asked.


	33. Strange Bedfellows

**Jackson**

I saturated Leah with a blast of calm to quell the burning rage within her. She slumped in my arms and the glare she shot at Tanya was very threatening.

"Tanya, that was rude," I pointed out flatly, "Leah carries the pain of losing a mate and I am trying to help."

"Are you, I mean, did she imprint on you?"

"No. Though it would have solved many problems, I am not meant for Leah," I looked at the young woman in my arms, "I'm sorry to talk about you as though you weren't right here. Do you want me to back off?"

Leah shook her head and buried her face into my neck.

"I don't understand," Tanya admitted.

"Leah loved her former boyfriend for years; they imprinted on each other the way humans do. Over time and through shared experiences they were as close as any bonded pair of Vampires. When he imprinted on her cousin she was left to suffer."

Tanya sat down near us, thankfully far enough away so Leah did not become defensive.

"I'm sorry Leah," she said heavily, "I must admit I am rather jealous of how quickly you have been able to find comfort in Jackson. We've spent six months together and I haven't had the courage to curl up in his arms like that."

"Maybe you weigh too much," Leah muttered.

Tanya laughed loudly even as the shock rippled through her. I waited nervously for her reaction.

"I like you Leah," Tanya announced with a gorgeous smile, "You've got balls."

"Do not."

"Don't deny it Wolfy, just because they're on your chest doesn't make them any less effective."

Leah shifted so she could peek at Tanya, "Jackson, your friend is crazy," she whispered.

"That's the best way to be," I replied, "To be sane in an insane world would be the real problem."

Leah pondered the thought while Tanya stretched out on the grass. I ran my hand along her warm back reassuringly.

"Are you feeling better?" I asked quietly.

"Yeah," she sighed, "I should probably get off you."

"Don't rush on my account," I replied cheekily, "I rarely get cuddles this warm."

"Watch out Leah," Tanya warned, "He's a charmer and those hugs can get addictive."

The crashing of a creature blundering through the forest interrupted the bonding moment the three of us were involved in.

I tensed automatically, assessing escape routes and defensive positions before Tanya sat up.

"Who let the dogs out?" Tanya sang. I raised an eyebrow at her questioningly.

"It's a song Jackson. You need to spend some time on the internet," she replied.

"Or at least in front of a TV," Leah added.

Two huge wolves I recognised as Seth and Embry bulldozed their way through the undergrowth. Since I had observed wolves being quite stealthy I was unnerved by their behaviour. If they were not attacking, had something awful happened back at the house?

Embry halted suddenly, his gaze locked on Leah. His movements were purposeful and deliberately threatening.

Seth made an odd yipping noise which made Leah tense in my arms.

"Bog off Embry," she said to the shifter slinking closer.

Embry was alarmed and the hostility aimed at me was easy to interpret.

"Can I help you Embry?" I asked pointedly. Even if he knew I was influencing him to remain calm there was nothing he could do about it.

Seth trotted forward to sniff at Leah's hair tentatively. Tanya giggled at their behaviour.

"You two are both pains in the arse," Leah muttered. The serene emotions she was absorbing from me took the sting out of her words.

"I believe Embry is concerned about your proximity to me," I said.

Embry snorted at me. I was going to need a long shower in a bath of bleach to get rid of the smell.

"I have not imprinted," Leah informed him bluntly, "I am not in love, I am not being manipulated in any unwelcome way and I don't need any assistance."

Embry sat down heavily, still glaring at me.

"Thank-you for your concern," Leah continued, "I have not felt this peaceful in years so I am ignoring the smell."

"You are very entertaining Leah," I replied, "But I must admit you reek too."

Embry settled down on the ground and rested him head on his front paws. He was clearly unhappy with the way Leah was draped over me, though he made no further move to interfere.

"Want a cuddle Seth?" Tanya teased with a grin. She held her arms out toward him.

Seth sniffed her hand hesitantly. Somehow his canine face was able to express how unattractive her scent was.

"Tanya, don't tell me you're going to be rejected by another male?" I teased.

"Edward doesn't count," Tanya argued, "There is clearly something wrong with him."

"Pretty obvious," Leah muttered.

Seth backed away from Tanya, who crawled toward Embry while the sneaky amusement curled around her. Embry watched her without raising his head.

"I've always wanted a pet," Tanya teased. Embry rolled his eyes.

Tanya snuggled up next to Embry. Like me she limited the conversation so she didn't have to breathe in too often.

Seth prowled around the area for a while, burying his nose in anything which caught his eye. When he was bored and had countless twigs and leaves clinging to his fur he approached Tanya. She clearly appreciated the warmth Embry provided on one side so Seth tucked his body along her other side. I was sure she was going to have to burn her clothes to get rid of the smell.

Had there ever been a gathering as strange as the one we made? I doubted it. Even with the awful smell hanging in the air I enjoyed the odd peace we shared. After so many decades of war and violence I was proud to sit with my natural enemies and relax.

Until Seth started snoring.

The emotional signatures I recognised as Emmett, Edward and Jasper reached me seconds before they came into view.

The three of them stopped abruptly at the sight of Leah almost asleep while sitting across my lap. They also gaped at Tanya snuggled up with her eyes closed between two sleeping shifters.

Thankfully Embry didn't snore as loudly as Seth.

"This is unexpected," Edward observed in surprise.

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes at his idiotic observation. Emmett grinned at Tanya and made a joke about kinky threesome.

"Piss off Emmett," Tanya mumbled, "Not everything is about sex."

Emmett turned his attention to Leah. Before he could say something to anger her I growled just enough to gain his attention.

"Keep your mouth shut or the pain she suffers will attack you every time you and Rosalie get friendly," I threatened.

His mouth clamped shut. Edward was watching Leah with blatant curiosity.

"So calm," Edward said to her, "I don't think I've ever known your mind to be so content."

"Until nosey Vampires show up to disturb us," Leah yawned.

"We're going hunting," Jasper said from behind his brothers, "Your eyes are getting rather dark Jackson."

"You're not very subtle are you Jasper?" Tanya said.

"It is a trait we share Tanya," he replied.

Tanya moved from her cosy position so Leah could take her place.

"Esme wants to get your help building a cabin for the Pack," Edward said to Tanya. The emotions from the three males left me quite suspicious that Tanya was being sent away so they could have a chat to me.

I agreed to accompany them hunting. Compared to the smell of the Pack, any animal would be quite appealing.

Leah was asleep by the time Tanya took off for the house. Emmett and Jasper raced in the opposite direction while Edward kept pace with me.

I could see the insecurity in his features while we ran. He wanted to broach something with me yet he was unsure of my reaction.

I considered playing dumb to lengthen his ordeal. Ultimately he was trying to think before speaking, which I had to encourage.

"You are going to give yourself an ulcer," I pointed out, "Speak Eddie."

"Don't call me Eddie," he muttered.

"Ok Ed."

He sighed, clearly irritated. The anxiety receded just enough so I didn't have to manipulate him with my gift.

"Your friendship with Leah has caught us by surprise," he said softly.

"I became friends with Rose quite quickly, with Tanya even faster."

Edward was uncomfortable again, it was almost entertaining.

"Leah has been through enough trauma, we are concerned that -"

"We?" I interrupted, "Who is 'we'?"

Emmett and Jasper waited ahead of us. They were both watching me.

"Alice had a vision of us speaking to you about Leah," Jasper admitted, "She didn't see how cuddly the two of you were getting though."

"Have you told Leah that you consider her a sister?" I asked, "She'll probably try to rip you a new one but if she's in a good mood she might think it's sweet."

Emmett smirked at me, "She seemed very relaxed back there in your arms."

"She is in pain; constant, aching pain. I couldn't leave her to suffer," I explained, "She didn't imprint; I know she is not my mate. She is not attracted to me at all so sex is not on the cards."

Emmett and Jasper were relieved. Edward's reaction was far more interesting.

"Are you seriously squirming with embarrassment because I mentioned sex?" I asked with a frown.

"No," Edward said, at the exact moment Jasper replied, "Yes."

"I thought Bella has banished the prude," Emmett observed, "How do you even take your pants off around her if you find the _word_ embarrassing?"

"How did this conversation end up on my sex life?" Edward demanded in a panicky voice.

"Well I don't have one," I volunteered before Emmett could, "Emmett won't shut up about his and everyone can feel when Jasper is getting some."

"And we all pretend that Carlisle and Esme don't have one," Jasper added.

"Seriously Edward, if you are this repressed with us I fear for Bella's sanity," I said honestly.

_Have you tried any position other than missionary?_ I asked in my thoughts.

"Yes," Edward replied snidely.

_Her idea? _

He nodded minutely.

"These two are boring," Emmett announced, "Come on Jasper, let's hunt something."

They took off into the forest. Both Edward and I knew that Emmett had purposefully left the two of us together so I could continue the conversation.

"Edward, you are painfully obvious," I said gently. He glared at me.

"You look at Emmett, Jasper and I and feel inadequate. Guess what? Every guy looks around and feels the exact same thing!"

He frowned at me.

"Bella sees you as gorgeous; no-one could compare in her eyes. Stop relying on your judgement of yourself and trust hers."

"How?"

"The guilt you feel needs to be dealt with," I pointed out, "You need to remind yourself that sex and sexual attraction are natural and nothing to feel guilt about. It may take a few years to break the habit so get started."

"I shouldn't think of Bella as a sex object," he whispered.

"Unless she's in the mood, which she usually is around you," I replied bluntly, "Have you tried talking to her about this?"

The shame resembled a noose around his neck. I was tempted to use my talent to remove it completely. Sadly I knew it would be rude to influence him without his permission.

"She needs to know why you react the way you do or she will misinterpret your behaviour and worry," I continued.

"Jackson, I don't want to talk to you about this."

"Edward, you are not comfortable in your own skin and that is a huge problem. I can help but you need to -"

"Leave me alone," Edward snarled before racing away.

The teenage temper tantrum did not surprise me. A plan was already forming in my mind which would piss him off more than anything I could say to his face.


	34. Interfering

**Jackson**

Edward avoided being alone with me for the duration of the hunt. Emmett tried to make a joke at Edward's expense, only to be shut down very quickly by Jasper.

Clearly speaking to the inhibited telepath was not going to help; a chat with Bella was definitely in order.

The wolves had returned to the house, no doubt drawn by the awful smell of copious quantities of food.

Alice raced toward us at top speed, squealing something unintelligible. I wondered if the wolves had instant ear aches from the pitch. She launched herself onto Jasper, wrapping her legs around his waist in an unusual display of blatant affection.

"It worked," Edward provided, "She can see Jake and Renesmee."

"That's great love," Jasper said, returning her hug.

They had always been very private about their relationship so I wasn't surprised when they withdrew from each other after a few moments.

I was surprised however when Alice launched herself at me. She clung to me without the carefree abandon of her embrace with her mate; even so Jasper growled at the sight.

"Thank-you Jackson! I had never thought blood was the key!"

I could see the jealousy beginning to bubble around Jasper. I gently leaned away from Alice and used the slightest pressure on her arms to encourage her to hop off me.

Emmett rushed forward as Rosalie beckoned him from within the house.

Alice bounced back to Jasper, her grin fading. Logically I knew any male in such a position with Alice would irritate him in the same way but it was disheartening anyway.

Jasper drew her small form against his side firmly. Did Alice not realize that his possessive instincts had been roused?

"I love that waterfall Jazz," Alice cooed to his unspoken request, "Let's go."

The disappeared in a blur of movement; no doubt by the time they returned Alice would smell of Jasper on every part of her skin.

Edward watched them go with strong curiosity. Finally he turned to me and asked softly, "Is that jealousy normal?"

"From what I have observed over the past six months, yes," I replied.

"I wouldn't have recognised it without seeing through your gift," Edward admitted. He seemed relieved, which made me curious too.

"I get jealous of other males near Bella, especially if they touch her," Edward acknowledged, "I thought I was just being an arse."

"You were being a _Vampire_," I stressed, "The sooner you accept your own nature, the happier you will be."

Edward frowned at me thoughtfully; he was relieved that his behaviour was normal. I told him silently that there were numerous other behaviours that were definitely not normal.

"In your opinion," Edward replied snidely.

_Feeding, fighting and fucking_, I told him in my mind, _that's the life of a Vampire._

Once again, he was distinctly uncomfortable.

It took me nearly two weeks to speak to Bella without Edward eavesdropping, and even then I needed assistance from Alice.

While Edward was discussing something with Carlisle, Alice recruited Jasper, Bella and I to help her with some furniture shopping for the new cabin Esme was building for Leah, Embry and Seth. I attempted to point out the joys of home delivery but the annoying little sprite wouldn't hear of it.

While Alice modelled some skimpy clothing for Jasper, Bella and I headed for the bookstore. I planned to decorate my room at the Cullen house with multiple bookshelves crammed with any books which could alleviate my boredom.

I waited until Bella was happily scanning new releases to broach the subject of her mate and his repressed attitude.

"Bella, has Edward spoken to you about the conversation we had just after the Pack arrived?" I asked quietly.

"Not that I recall," she replied absently.

I repeated most of the conversation for her, and added my Empathic observations to deepen her understanding.

"I'm concerned that he is clinging to nineteenth century morals, which is not only ridiculous but potentially damaging to his relationship with you."

The flare of annoyance was a welcome reaction; if she had reacted with anxiety and guilt at the very mention of their intimacy I would have accepted defeat and let them suffer their repressed sex life together.

"We've made progress over the last decade but clearly he is rather slow at learning some lessons," Bella mused, "It is time I took charge and knock some sense into his head."

I didn't know what I expected her to do or say. If I had been human I would have been beet red when I realized where her next shopping destination was.

"Am I really the best person to bring along for an opinion?" I asked in a rush. I understood the tremor of panic I had heard in Edward's voice a fortnight earlier when I heard it in my own.

"Have you never been into a lingerie store before?" Bella asked dismissively, "Just be thankful this place doesn't have a sex store."

Alice was struggling to speak through her laughter. Rose, Esme and Leah listened to the description with wide eyes and amused grins.

I didn't understand why I had to be present for the retelling of my humiliation.

"Jackson was standing there next to some ugly pink underwear, holding Bella's purse and trying to avoid the saleswomen," Alice shrieked, "I have never seen anything so funny in my life!"

I was still grateful that Jasper hadn't burst into laughter along with his mate. He had witnessed my descent from warrior to bag-holder with the agonised expression of a fellow soldier drafted into the exact same position more than once.

"And then Bella comes strolling out in a purple lace bra and matching thong!" Alice continued, prompting another roar of laughter from the women.

"No wonder the males get jealous of other men around their mates," I huffed.

Alice ignored me, "And says 'Uncle Jackson, do you think this will help my husband get in the mood?' The look on his face!"

I had actually covered my eyes with my hand at that point and Jasper had done the same.

"Can I leave now?" I pleaded, "Why couldn't I go hunting with everyone else?"

Alice was a manipulative thing at the best of time yet I had sensed no deception from her when she had decided that I could not accompany the rest of the Vampires on a hunt. Renesmee and the Pack had gone into town to see a movie or something.

"You just can't," Alice retorted, "I'm blind while the wolves are here and refusing to donate their blood. Jasper isn't happy unless he can see me, or you can."

Leah rolled her eyes at Alice. She had flatly refused to offer up her blood to the seer, claiming that the future was unknown for a reason.

I was rather proud that Jasper trusted me to watch over his mate above everyone else, though he bowed to her interference so often that I doubted he even noticed when he was being manipulated.

The retelling of the embarrassing scene at the lingerie shop continued. I had not found it flattering when both of the sales ladies had offered me their phone numbers. One was wearing a wedding ring and the other had spent far too much time staring at my butt.

I left the house and scaled the tree in the front yard. I was never really comfortable on the ground; I needed height to make sure I had an unobstructed view of the surrounding terrain. The clouds blocked the sunlight so I did not need to worry about resembling a glittering koala.

I was uncomfortably thirsty, though I had suffered much worse when Maria had been pissed off at me. Her punishments were always private so the newborns would not lose respect for me.

Once she had waited until I was quite thirsty before ordering me into her bedroom. She had offered to let me drain as any humans as orgasms I could provide her in an hour. I had fed very well that day; too bad I had not enjoyed the sex. Sadly until Emily had come along the only intimate encounters I enjoyed took place while I was alone, and that was pathetic on a whole new level.

The layer of morality the Cullen's tried to attach to Vampire morality would be amusing if it wasn't so frustrating. Had Tanya and I met as nomad we would have either fought or sought sexual relief with each other for a few months.

I did wonder how much Alice knew from her visions and how much she just assumed. I decided that the next time I saw Tanya I was going to use all of my charms to seduce her.

I waited for a shrill protest from Alice and heard nothing. Though it was not a nice path of thought to follow I wondered if Alice had decreed Tanya and I could not sleep together out of proprietary rather than a genuine concern for our friendship.

Edward would definitely judge us for indulging in a sexual relationship; though I suspected he had judged me as soon as he saw the scar on my face. There was a chance he could change his narrow-minded view on life but it would take decades.

Carlisle had 'encouraged' Jasper to propose to Alice after they arrived. I knew Alice had been delighted by the wedding, which could have been enough motivation for Jasper. If Carlisle had acted out of distress that they were 'living-in-sin' his actions would reflect more on his outdated morals that on anything else.

I had to be realistic about my past experiences with the two women I could remember having sex with; neither had ended well. Would it be better to work through all my issues with Tanya so I was ready for a real relationship when I met my mate? Or would dealing with my past be a bonding experience I needed to share with the unknown human female who I was waiting for?

I remained deep in my self-absorbed musing until the delicious scent of human blood reached me. Never before had any scent taken control of my brain and robbed me of reason so completely.

I had a human body in my arms and a mouth full of blood before I realized I had moved. Bones broke under my ruthless hands and the screams of my victim echoed in my ears.

The heart stopped and the blood ran out. I blinked in amazement, savouring the marvellous taste. The emotions of the dying human hit me an instant later, blasting me into unconsciousness.

_Emily floated in front of me wearing a sad smile. I reached for her but she was too far away._

_"Do you believe in reincarnation?" Emily asked softly._

_"I don't know."_

_"I lived before," she explained, "I waited for you to return from the war. When you disappeared I lost interest in living. When I contracted pneumonia in 1947 I knew I was going to die."_

_"Ruth," I whispered, recognising something in her._

_She smiled, "Yes. My life as Ruth ended, and I was reborn as Emily in 1949. I am your mate Jackson, and I will keep returning to you until we are finally together."_

_"Stay with me," I pleaded._

_"Not yet my love," she whispered, "It is not yet time. When I wake up, I will think this is a dream. Be strong Jackson."_

_She faded away until I was left in the darkness._

The sky was moving. Alice, Rosalie and Esme were carrying me toward the house. The faintest taste of human blood lingered on my tongue.

"Stop," I growled. My legs were dropped to the ground. Rosalie kept her grip under my arms until I was back on my feet.

"I'm sorry," Alice apologized from a cloud of regret, "If you had gone hunting you would have caught the scent and killed four people. I didn't realize he would come here; I'm so sorry."

"You could have told me," I hissed, "I would have been on guard against human scents. You are not a god Alice, so stop making decisions for everyone."


	35. Red Eyes

**Jackson**

I wanted the space to run, hunt and rip into a boulder to vent some frustration. I easily evaded the women attempting to calm me and stomped over to the body I had just drained.

I knelt down next to the middle-aged man whose blood had called to me. I reached out to gently close his eyes but I could do nothing about the horrified expression on his face.

"He was your Singer," Alice whispered, "You had no chance. I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing Alice," I growled, "Words mean nothing; actions mean everything. Next time you want to meddle in someone's life TALK to them instead!"

Rosalie strode toward me even while Alice and Esme kept their distance out of fear. Leah stood to the side wearing an unhappy frown.

"We will take care of this," Rosalie declared, "Go have a shower."

"I can -"

"Inside Jackson!" Her voice changed; she was not making a suggestion, she was giving an order.

"Yes ma'am," I obeyed immediately, knowing Rosalie had the strength to deal with the situation which had been created. I trusted her enough to withdraw.

I paused near Leah, meeting her angry gaze with my red eyes. I didn't need to speak; I could see the judgement in her face.

The boots Alice had nagged me to wear were covered in dirt. I slipped them off and left them on the front steps.

The lingering scent of the blood haunted me. I let it seep into my consciousness and welcomed the nausea which I had trained my body to associate with human blood.

The bathroom attached to my room was a welcome sight. I stripped off my clothes and dropped them on the tiled floor. I turned the water on, not caring about the temperature. I scrubbed every inch of my body in an attempt to eradicate the scent.

It was hopeless as a few drops of blood had landed on my shirt, and it sat on the floor spreading the smell through the room. I deserved the guilt and queasiness so I left them there to torment me.

The real problem was the guilt was light and easily ignored; I had killed so many humans during my Vampire existence that one more was not going to change much. Knowing that he had been my singer also lightened the load; I did not have ninety years of self-control to help my singer escape unharmed.

Esme silently entered my room, collected my blood-stained clothing and retreated. I barely looked at her. I should have been picturing the horrified expression on my victim's face but all I could think about was the vision of Emily/Ruth.

My mate was alive, somewhere out in the world. The thought paralysed me with possibilities. I had to wait for the right time, which was odd.

I remained in my room sulking like a child for three days. Each of the family members tried to coax me out in their own way. I liked hearing Emmett's stories about the two times he had crossed paths with his singers.

I tried not to smile when Rosalie attempted to order me out of my room under the threat of letting Alice throw out all of my clothes and replace them with new styles.

Edward remained silent, which made me suspect Bella had him shielded. If he was hearing my thoughts he would be repeating the information like a parrot with verbal diarrhoea.

Embry had loudly asked if I was hiding from the Pack and was surprisingly easy to ignore. The only one who had not said something to antagonise me or visited in person was Leah. I was almost looking forward to seeing how creative she could be.

Oddly the more I got to know the Pack, the less they stank. Leah in particular didn't smell horrible anymore, just unpleasant. Finally Jasper took pity on the family and let her know that I was not wallowing in guilt as she thought.

"This is ridiculous," Leah declared. Her annoyance and anger spiked dangerously as she spoke. I heard her stomp up the stairs until she appeared in the doorway of my room.

"If you're not wallowing in guilt, what the hell is the problem?" she demanded.

Funnily enough no-one else had actually asked what I was brooding over; they had all assumed I was guilt-ridden.

"I saw my mate," I whispered, "She has lived and died twice in my lifetime."

Leah sat down on the end of my bed without invitation, "Explain that again."

I briefly summarised the vision, how I had watched Emily die and her new life as a human which I was not allowed to intrude on next.

Leah stared at me in surprise, "Shit."

"Exactly. I needed time to process."

Her eyes narrowed, "Is there any guilt about the murder you committed?"

I sighed, "I regret killing him. I regret that I am not strong enough to resist the call of my singer. Yet now that I have that memory, all other human blood is bland and I suspect much easier to resist."

Below in the living room Emmett paused in his video game long enough to mutter, "He ignores all of us but won't shut up when Leah wanders in. Why don't they just hook up already?"

"Emmett!" Leah yelled, "Why don't you hook up with Bella?"

"We both have mates."

"And if you didn't?" Leah challenged.

"She's a sister to me."

"Leah is a sister to me," I said with a small smile at the shifter.

"And Jackson is the stupid older brother who needs me to kick his arse," Leah clarified.

"You can try."

A fresh wave of anxiety washed over her, "Jackson, Nahuel is going to arrive tomorrow." Her eyes pleaded with me for help.

Outwardly Leah looked tense, even annoyed but I could sense the nerves which she battled with. Despite her assertions that imprinting on a 'half-leech' didn't interest her she was clearly hoping for it to happen.

Alice and Jasper had left to meet Nahuel and bring him to the house. I remained in the tree in the front yard while Leah stood below me. Seth and Embry were phased and lying around the front yard like a pair of spoiled pets.

Jacob and Renesmee were standing near the mail box talking quietly. The rest of the Vampires were inside the house.

My own anxiety matched Leah's; a crowd this large always made me nervous. The swirl of emotions mixed together until I couldn't identify the source of each one. My gift was next to useless in battle so I tried to ignore it. During training of the newborns it was often a hindrance until I was able to subdue the strongest personalities in each batch.

Memories of my time with Maria would not remain in the back of my mind. I wanted to flee or attack something so I could escape the image of her eyes narrowed at me in disapproval.

Edward stepped out of the house with Bella close behind. Their bond shone brightly between them.

"Jackson, if you need some space you are free to withdraw," Edward offered.

Leah glanced up at me with concern. Bella moved down the steps toward her daughter. I watched the mating bond stretch between the mated Vampires and touch Leah inadvertently.

A wave of calm surged over Leah while she was in contact with their invisible bond. She did not appear to notice though I could see her anxiety return after it moved away.

"I'm fine," I insisted. I focused on the bond and what the implications could be to keep my anxiety at bay.

"Very interesting," Edward mused. He was watching me; no doubt he had been watching the bond pass through Leah by reading my thoughts.

"Are they here yet?" Leah asked him sharply.

"Nearly," Edward replied absently, finally turning his full attention to the wolf, "He's not alone."

Leah was bouncing on the balls of her feet like a hyperactive child. I dropped out of the tree and slipped an arm around her. She leaned into me gratefully.

Edward raised an eyebrow at us. I ignored him.

Jasper was the first to reappear. He was clearly in soldier mode, his eyes scanning for danger and his back noticeably straight. He positioned himself so he could see everyone in the vicinity.

I could hear Alice chatting excitedly. I glanced at the wolves on the lawn to see if they would flinch from the high-pitched sound. Embry just glared at me.

"Nahuel has brought his sisters Maysun and Jennifer with him," Edward said aloud. Shock clouded his aura, "Jennifer is younger than he is; Joham didn't stop when he had a son."

"So he could still be impregnating human women somewhere?" Leah clarified angrily.

Edward nodded while I used my gift to gently calm Leah. If she phased she would have to wait to find clothes and shift back to find out if she was going to imprint.

Alice led a black-haired male toward the house. He was shorted than I expected, though he looked tall compared to Alice. Two beautiful black-haired women followed them, and Jasper fell into step at the very back of the group.

"Hello Nahuel," Edward greeted politely, "The wolves on the lawn are Seth and Embry; this is Leah and Jackson. I am sure you remember Renesmee and Jacob."

"Hello Edward, it is good to see you again," his dark eyes held a tinge of red.

"Jackson, this is Nahuel; he was instrumental in convincing the Volturi that Renesmee was not an immortal child."

"Hello," I kept my greeting short. His eyes lingered on my face and his rapid heart rate increased slightly.

"These are two of my sisters Maysun and Jennifer," Nahuel introduced the women, "They were extremely curious about the process of imprinting and shifters."

Maysun was taller than her brother but shorter than Jennifer. Both women eyed me with apprehension.

Jacob and Renesmee greeted the group while Leah kept her eyes on her shoes. Both the wolves on the lawn watched the newcomers with curiosity.

"I can see your mother in you," Nahuel said to Renesmee. The jealousy around Jacob was interesting.

"It is good to see you again Nahuel," Jacob said quietly, "Maysun, Jennifer; welcome to the Cullen home."

"Have you taken the Cullen name too?" Nahuel asked.

"I remain Jacob Black," he replied, "We consider the Cullen's to be allies as well as in-laws. We are staying here temporarily while we seek a suitable home nearby."

"We may be moving soon, it has been a few years," Bella mused.

I was silently thankful that she didn't mention the dead human which could prompt an immediate evacuation.

"Yes Embry," Edward said, "Just make sure you are dressed when you return."

Everyone turned to watch as Embry stood up, stretched and then bounded off toward the trees.

Jennifer lost interest in the polite conversation quite quickly. She turned toward Seth with a smile.

"Can I approach you?" she asked him in her lovely voice.

Seth rolled onto his back like a dog, his tail wagging furiously.

"You are an embarrassment Seth!" Leah hissed.

Jennifer giggled at his antics. Nahuel moved to pull her away from the shifter until Alice place her hand on his arm and whispered to him.

Embry ran out of the forest in human form. He was wearing shorts but his shirt was still draped over his arm.

"Put your clothes on!" Jacob bellowed at him. Many of the females giggled at the sight of Embry's bare torso.

Maysun moved toward him in a whoosh of air, "Hello; you don't need to put clothes on if you prefer," her eyes swept over his body and the lust was obvious.

Embry stared at her in amazement, completely speechless; his emotions whirled frantically as though in a kaleidoscope.

"Shit," Edward muttered, "Embry just imprinted."

Maysun ran her fingers along Embry's jaw, "What does imprinting feel like?" she whispered.

Embry grinned, "Like waking up from a long, sad nightmare."

He reached out to touch her hair when Nahuel began growling.


	36. Imprinting

**Jackson**

Maysun spun around and pressed her back against Embry. A growl exploded from her chest and her red eyes were focused on her brother.

"Nahuel, it's alright," Alice tried to sooth the hybrid, "Embry just imprinted, he won't hurt her."

Nahuel fell silent. His eyes shifted from the shifter to his sister and back again.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly.

Maysun let her growl fade away, "Forgiven. Embry, this is my brother Nahuel. He can be a jerk sometimes but I know he doesn't mean it."

"Um, hi," Embry mumbled. He had trouble tearing his eyes away from Maysun.

Maysun caught his hand in her own, "Why don't we take a walk and get to know each other better?"

Considering the lust I could see around both of them I doubted they would be talking for too long.

"Maysun!" Nahuel argued, "You have just met him; you shouldn't -"

"Nahuel," she snarled back, "I am nearly two hundred years old. If you try to tell me what to do simply because you have testicles I can rip them off for you."

Jennifer giggled, which broke some of the tension.

"I worry for you," Nahuel replied, "How will Joham react when he finds out about this?"

"You are the one who had been telling me to think for myself and build a life away from Father; this is the first step."

"Nice to meet you," Embry said happily before Maysun led the way into the forest.

"I'm glad I can't see Embry," Alice announced suddenly, "Though even without the visions I am sure they are going to need new clothes."

"I'm proud of you Nahuel," Jennifer complemented, "I don't think anyone else could tell you were acting."

Nahuel grinned at her, "You know me too well little sister."

"Your emotions gave it away," Jasper added, "You were pretending to be angry though you were actually quite relieved."

"Joham has controlled my sisters for long enough," Nahuel said flatly, "Serena may be beyond hope but Maysun and Jennifer deserve to live their own lives."

"Seth, I hope you imprint on me," Jennifer said to the shifter, "I love how warm you are."

Seth froze in place, staring at her in silence. He enjoyed his life and had not pined for a mate the way Embry and Leah had.

"Seth is only twenty-five," Edward explained as the uncertainty grew within Jennifer, "He has never seriously considered imprinting until today."

Jennifer frowned at the shifter, "Well think about it," she suggested pointedly. She leaned forward and kissed his nose.

"I know what this is all about," Nahuel said as Jennifer skipped over to him, "You always wanted a puppy but they were all scared of you."

"Can we keep him?" she asked him sweetly.

"Only if he imprints," Nahuel replied.

Bella and Renesmee were giggling at the exchange. Alice was not amused, which could have been due to her lack of visions.

Seth ran toward the forest with his tail wagging.

"This should be interesting," Edward mused as he watched the shifter disappear from sight.

"You don't have to do this now," I whispered to Leah.

"Everyone is distracted by Seth and Jennifer," Edward countered, "It might be the perfect time."

Leah stood up straight, her features set in a determined expression, "Let's get this over with."

Nahuel walked toward Leah with graceful purpose; obviously he had heard our soft conversation. Leah kept her eyes on her feet as she approached him.

"Even if you do not imprint, I would love to get to know you better," Nahuel said softly. There was definite interest from him, beyond curiosity of meeting someone new.

"Thanks," Leah mumbled.

"How is a beautiful woman like you still single?" he asked.

Leah looked up finally. While most of the attention was centred on Seth emerging shirtless from the woods I waited nervously for Leah to react.

Her emotions froze; for a full second I could not sense a single thing from her. I teetered on the brink of hope.

Disappointment and anger blossomed around Leah in an explosive, tumultuous cloud.

Jennifer squealed with happiness when Seth stared at her in adoration. Leah took advantage of the distraction to explode out of her clothes and run into the forest.

Her pain hit me like a tsunami. I staggered sideways until I was able to catch myself on the tree. Jasper dropped to his knees with his hands pressed to his head.

Nahuel stared at the forest, watching the last place where he had seen Leah. He was disappointed too.

I pushed myself to my feet and followed her with gritted teeth. The long, miserable howl of a lone wolf echoed through the forest.

Alice caught up with me easily and shoved some clothing into my hands. I grunted a thank-you and continued my march into the forest.

"Good luck," Alice said sadly.

Her visions were blank so I couldn't even ask her advice on how to approach Leah.

The path was easy to follow; broken branches, torn shrubbery and a wide path in the remaining snow led me to the heart-broken wolf.

She lay on the wet dirt in a messy pile of grey fur, the epicentre of a circle of destruction. The trees all bore claw marks and two of the smaller ones had been snapped completely.

I saturated her with calm and tried to dissolve the edge of the misery she was caught in. She did not react.

I approached her carefully, noting that neither her ears nor her eyes flicked in my direction. She truly did not care that her natural enemy was drawing closer and that worried me immensely.

I sat down next to her and reached out to stroke her neck. A small, sad whine echoed through her chest.

"I'm sorry Leah," I commiserated softly, "I know how much of a relief it would have been to finally imprint."

I placed the clothing next to her head where she could clearly see it. She blinked at me slowly.

Even if she did imprint, I doubted the pain within her would disappear as she hoped. After ten years of refusing to deal with the emotional trauma of her first love I suspected the hardened, bitter edge to her personality was permanent.

I hoped I was wrong, for her sake.

The light was fading from the sky by the time Leah hauled her furry grey body to her feet and trudged out of sight to shift. I tossed the clothing after her when she left it behind. Seeing her naked would be a glorious sight but she would kick my butt later when she wasn't weighted down by the latest blow life had delivered her.

She was wearing the blue dress Alice had chosen when she re-emerged. Without a word she dropped into my lap and buried her face into my neck. I enveloped her with as much soothing emotions as I could yet still felt completely inadequate.

**Bella**

According to my mate Jackson was cursing himself for his inability to help Leah. I wanted to grab him by the ear and drill into his head how much he was already able to ease her pain.

Leah had never been so happy; she actually smiled now which was amazing in itself. She joked with Emmett, hugged Seth and I had even seen her talking with Rosalie.

Jackson did not know how withdrawn Leah had been over the past ten years. I had watched her deterioration myself, yet only when she came back to life did I realize how far she had fallen under the sway of depression.

Nothing I could say or do could clear his misconceptions so I did not try. Instead I promised myself that when he found his mate I would do everything in my power to assist their courtship. He was such a private person that breaking through those walls would be a mammoth task.

Jackson walked out of the forest with the military bearing which I also saw daily in Jasper. He carried Leah bridal-style without effort. His honey-coloured hair curled around his forehead boyishly, in contrast to his impassive expression and intimidating scar. Leah had her head tucked under his chin; once again I reflected how unfair it was that they were not destined for each other.

Neither of them knew what a poetic image they created.

"Can I please make a 'Cowboys and Indians' joke?" Emmett whined.

A soft growl from Rosalie saved the rest of us from answering. They were sitting together near Edward and I on the front veranda of the house.

The emotional environment had driven Jasper to seek refuge away from the house, taking Alice with him.

Nahuel had made a rather odd request of Carlisle, and they were upstairs discussing why the hybrid wanted to know if he was capable of siring children.

The boots Alice had made Jackson wear crunched over the driveway as he approached. Usually the wolves stayed away from the main house in favour of their cabin, but Seth and Jennifer were getting to know each other in there. I was once again grateful that the cabins on the property were all spaced far enough apart that sounds could not be picked up by even Vampire ears.

"I don't want to stink up the house," I heard Leah say.

Jackson paused and his eyes roamed over the four of us. Rosalie stood up; pulling Emmett with her. They resettled on the steps.

Jackson nodded his thanks to the couple as he passed. He sat down on the small lounge they had vacated. Leah made no move to extricate herself from his embrace.

They made an interesting picture; even though I knew there was nothing romantic brewing between then I could easily imagine them as a couple. Jackson kept himself aloof and intimidating, his emotions rarely cracking the surface of the persona he presented.

Leah was a smouldering cauldron of emotions, each of which were clearly recognisable on her face and in her actions. She was incapable of subterfuge and had no patience for manipulations.

I heard Carlisle tell Nahuel that he was sterile. My hand tightened on Edward's as I waited for a reaction from the hybrid.

"I suspected as much," Nahuel revealed, "My sisters are barren too; they have ovaries but the eggs are missing. My sire wanted to subject me to tests too but I avoid him wherever possible. Thank-you for confirming my suspicions."

My first thoughts were of my daughter. Renesmee had never expressed a desire to have children, though hints had been dropped by half of the family. I hoped she wouldn't be disappointed if it turned out she was not able to conceive.

Nahuel and Carlisle moved through the house at a leisurely pace, discussing the purpose of imprinting if not to produce offspring. I listened with interest and realized that Nahuel had been pondering the idea for quite some time.

"I can understand that some imprinting served the purpose of continuing the bloodlines," Nahuel was saying as they exited the house, "Yet with the threat of Vampires a permanent fixture it does make sense that an eternal Pack needed to be formed."

So why hadn't Leah imprinted on him? I glanced at the sad wolf still curled up on Jackson's lap. Nahuel noticed the direction of my glance and considered Leah thoughtfully.

"Leah, I would have been honoured to be your imprint," Nahuel said softly.

Leah sighed, "Fate likes to bitch-slap me," she declared, "Why give me a happy ending when I can watch my Packmates be happy while I sit alone and miserable."

Nahuel knelt down in front of her. Jackson appeared distinctly uncomfortable, yet there was no way to extricate himself from under Leah without interrupting the conversation. He was an eternal soldier and gentleman.

"Leah, what if female wolves are not capable of imprinting? Perhaps Nature has deemed you intelligent enough to make intelligent decisions while the males have the choices made for them?" Nahuel reasoned.

"That would suck," Leah replied with her typical tact, "I want this ache to go away; I want to be able to hear the name 'Sam' without cringing. I want to feel something other than anger and misery!"

"Leah, may I have your permission to court you?"

Leah stared at him in shock, and she was not the only one.

"Why?" she managed.

Nahuel laughed, "You are frighteningly honest and I love your sense of humour. If you imprint one day I will withdraw to allow you to be happy, but in the meantime I want to enjoy your company."

Behind Leah I could see Jackson smile. I wondered what Leah and Nahuel were feeling to amuse the Empath during an apparently serious conversation.

"And if it doesn't work out?" Leah asked cautiously.

"I would love to be your friend."


	37. Finding a Path

**Jackson**

Nahuel and Leah went for a walk to get to know each other better. Leah was hopeful but cautious so I was sure they weren't going to end up naked like the other couples who had wandered away to seek some privacy.

I liked Leah as a person, and already thought of her as family. I was always hopeless at analysing my own feelings, yet I was sure she evoked sisterly emotions.

Edward was watching me strangely. I silently asked him to voice what was making him so curious or I would begin picturing his wife naked.

"Your thoughts toward Leah are interesting," he admitted, "Once you hoped she would imprint on you, then you wanted to ease her pain and now you are like a father watching his daughter leave the nest."

"Telepaths," I snorted, "You think you know so much. People, and Vampires think all sorts of nonsense. You need to analyse their emotions and their actions to be able to understand anything."

"You may be right," Edward mused.

"I know he is," Rosalie agreed absently.

My mind shot to their dysfunctional relationship before I could stop the images. One day they would sort out the issues which had festered for decades but it was not my place to prompt such a discussion.

"Why hasn't anyone invented artificial blood?" I asked suddenly.

Even Emmett looked confused when I blurted that out.

"I have kept my mouth closed for months," I added, though Edward snorted to show his disagreement, "And I really want to know; why hasn't anyone in this family invented artificial blood? Is some other Vampire working on it?"

"I saw that in a TV show," Emmett replied with a grin.

"Those Vampires have fangs," Bella pointed out, "And sunlight cooks them."

"That would suck," Edward mused, "As much as I hate looking like a glitter ball on a sunny day, being roasted is even less appealing."

"Sleeping would be nice," Rosalie added, "But not in the dirt; that would be gross."

"So no-one is going to answer my question?"

"Carlisle wanted to work on it a few decades ago," Edward revealed, "But he was worried about drawing attention. Medical science was advancing so fast that he was sure humans would sort it out before the turn of the century."

"There are a few types which can replace many of the functions of the blood, but not carrying oxygen," Rosalie explained, "It tastes good but doesn't satisfy."

"Have you tried mixing it with animal blood?"

They looked at me with equally surprised expressions. Once again I was struck by how limited their imaginations were.

"I'll take that as a 'no'."

Rosalie and Edward continued the conversation about that suggestion while my attention wandered to Leah again. I hoped she would find happiness, even long enough to stop blaming herself for not being able to hold onto Sam.

"Nahuel has another theory he is sharing with Leah," Edward said softly to me.

I rolled my eyes at his shameless gossiping.

"I do not gossip," Edward argued.

Rosalie, Emmett and Bella all laughed at him. I smiled as his annoyance kept the amusement at bay.

"Anyway," he growled, "Nahuel wonders is Leah is fertile, and that is why she didn't imprint."

"It always seemed weird," Bella mused, "She has the strongest bloodlines and yet none of the boys imprinted on her."

"Imagine the tension if she had experienced some sort of shifter mating heat," Emmett added with a grin, "They would have killed each other over her, or had an orgy."

Rosalie stared at him while he cringed, waiting for her to slap him or say something cutting. Instead she remained motionless.

"That actually makes a lot of sense," Bella concluded, "To keep the Pack stable, maybe her body chose to become temporarily infertile. Once she is surrounded by only imprinted males, who knows what could happen?"

I frowned at the forest; I really hoped she was not out there getting naked with the hybrid. More than anything else, I didn't want her to be hurt again.

Even Jacob and Renesmee decided to travel with the Pack for a while, much to Bella's dismay. With eternity stretching ahead I didn't understand her concerns. Rosalie suggested that Renesmee take her parents with her on their planned trip to Africa.

Leah thanked me for my help and promised to stay in touch. She confided that she and Nahuel were going to remain friends while they got to know each other and then see what happened.

She cried a little, which made me uncomfortable though I couldn't admit it. I had wished that I could cry more than once in my life.

"I will miss you little wolf," I admitted gruffly while she held me in a scorching hug. I savoured the nauseating smell, knowing I would miss it as soon as she left.

"Keep in touch Leech," she replied as we pulled apart, "And when you find your mate I need to meet her to make sure she's good enough for you."

The rest of the family kept their distance, though I was sure they could still hear us. Nearby the Pack was excited to explore the world.

Life returned to normalcy, or as close to 'normal' as the Cullen's would understand. Living on the edge of death under the watchful gaze of a manipulative sire would have been more familiar to me.

I was surrounded by blissfully happy couples and it was pissing me off. The stench of wolf in the forest was slowly fading, and I was continually grateful that I did not need to breathe.

I sought out Rosalie, when she was not sneaking off somewhere semi-private to get naked with Emmett.

"I love Nessie," Rosalie commented airily while sprawled on the living room floor with a glossy magazine, "But when she takes her pets away I am relieved that the stench begins to fade."

I appreciated how she opened the conversation without any awkward greetings. Her bored tone and passing insult covered her effort to reach out to me. I could sense the concern she had for me, and it was sweet.

"I want to hunt," I said without preamble, "I need to throw out some emotions too."

Rosalie nodded knowingly, "I'll grab Emmett, and we can leave in ten."

Jasper and Alice entered the house behind me. I realized that I was not concerned that my back was exposed to them.

"Only ten minutes?" Jasper teased, "Emmett must be losing his stamina."

Rosalie flipped him off as she left the house.

"New house rule," Alice announced suddenly, "No-one is allowed to tease Edward about his sex life."

"So everything has to redirect to Emmett," Jasper added.

I snorted, mainly annoyed that I didn't have a sex life to be teased about.

"Are you sure it would screw things up if Tanya and I-"

"Yes," Alice cut me off, "Think about the conversation you will have to have with a long-term lover to explain why certain movements make you flinch. If you share that with Tanya instead of your mate, the mating bond will be weaker than it should be."

"And if you have sex with Tanya without having that conversation she will never understand," Jasper added.

I raised an eyebrow at him, wondering if he knew that from experience. He pressed his lips together to indicate that he would not speak about it any further.

"Which will ruin the friendship," Alice concluded, "Damn, this is annoying having to explain why I make these decisions."

"Less annoying that having decisions made for you," I pointed out.

Emmett yelled at us from the yard, something about Santa needing his reindeer herd culled.

"Jingle Bells, Emmett smells," Alice sang as she glided outside.

"Edward ran away," Jasper continued.

"Did they really?" Rosalie wondered, "I looked for them but their trails were all old."

Jasper and I regarded Alice; her emotions gave her away.

"Cough it up," Emmett ordered her.

"Bella and Edward have left on an errand," Alice said tightly.

"Errand?" I coaxed.

"Lonnie will be released from prison tomorrow."

"Is Edward going to try to stop her?" Emmett wondered.

"Not if he wants to keep his testicles," Rosalie countered.

Emmett moaned, "Can I joke about him if he's not here?"

"No," Jasper and I replied together.

I felt better once I had drained a few reindeer, though the lingering sensation of boredom remained. I didn't have a mate or a purpose; life was boring the hell out of me.

Bella and Edward returned after a week. They both retained their golden eyes and the rest of the family stank of curiosity.

I expected an immediate confrontation from Carlisle, considering his strong opinions on killing humans. Instead the couple was welcomed home and the elephant in the house was ignored.

Emmett found an online news article about the recently-released sex-offender who had been found hanged in his own apartment. I was looking forward to the family meeting which was planned for the moment Carlisle returned from work.

Bella did not emit one wisp of guilt, which I admired. Edward did, but I suspected it was the disappointment from Carlisle he regretted rather than dismay at the outcome.

Rosalie tried to initiate a conversation about the death, and Esme quickly silenced her. I admired Esme in that moment and sent Rosalie a wave of calm.

"We will wait for Carlisle," Esme explained tightly.

We spent three hours motionless in the living room. I could see the annoyance of most of the family and was secretly delighted; life was just as tedious for me most days so it was nice to know that my reaction was normal.

Esme went outside to greet her mate when we heard the car approaching. Silence reigned within the house as we listened to Esme inform Carlisle of the death. I was sure it was a murder yet even in my thoughts I tried to avoid the term.

Carlisle and Esme returned wearing sombre expressions. The family sat in the same room for a full minute before a word was spoken.

"Bella, Edward; did you kill Lonnie and make it look like a suicide?" Carlisle asked finally.

"Yes," Bella replied calmly, "Edward helped with the planning; I carried it out."

Carlisle was surrounded by disappointment and dread.

"I cannot condone this," he said firmly, "As you were an intended victim I can understand your need for reprisal, but if it happens again neither of you would be welcome as permanent members of this family."

"I understand," Bella replied evenly, "And I hope I never again have to deal with a monster like that."

She didn't rule out the possibility of killing again, which interested me greatly.

Alice spoke up, "Carlisle, if we remain together as a family until the end of the year the Volturi will come for us," she said flatly.

Alarm spread through the assembled Vampires quickly.

"Jasper and I are going to take a long holiday around the world," she continued, "Jackson, you and Tanya are invited to travel with us."

"Should the rest of us scatter too?" Rosalie asked with a frown.

Alice stared at the back of the room for a few long seconds. I didn't like the way her emotions blanked out, though I was used to the sensation after so many months witnessing it.

"Aro, Renata, Felix and Demetri will arrive together; Jane and Alec will remain out of sight but close enough to incapacitate if needed. If the six of you remain together Aro will be suspicious but not hostile."

"He will know that we only left to avoid a confrontation," I pointed out.

Edward made a weird noise and stared at Alice in disbelief, "You want to split the family permanently?"

"Not a chance," Emmett declared. At the same time Rosalie announced, "No way!"

"Alice, this is a huge decision," Carlisle intoned gravely, "I refuse to let the threat of the Volturi tear us apart. Take a vacation if you must, but no decisions will be made until we are reunited."

Alice agreed easily. I was not the only one to sense that the decision had already been made.

"Let's meet up in Paris in a few months," Rosalie suggested.

"It has been decades since I visited London," Carlisle mused.

"We will keep in touch," Alice assured her parents, "I'll call every week to check in. We can meet up in different places and search for a place where we can live close enough while still being considered two separate families."

"Siberia?" Bella suggested, "I've always wanted to learn Russian."

"Sounds great Comrade!" Emmett boomed, "The bears in Russia need to be hunted!"

"Emmett," Esme scolded, "Try not to think with your stomach all the time."

"His stomach is the nicer option," Edward sighed.

They were strange and I had known them for less than a year but I was sure I was going to miss living with the Cullen's.


	38. Humans

**Jackson**

Tanya was delighted at the prospect of travelling the world. Though she had spent many years exploring, the changes over the last two centuries intrigued her.

"Kate has no interest in travelling anymore," Tanya confided, "Except to desecrate new surfaces with Garrett. That is one adventure I do not want to be a witness to."

"Blissful couples are bad enough around here," I agreed, "At least with Alice and Jasper we don't have to worry about catching them in the act; she'd see us on the way."

"I do not envy her that power," Tanya mused, "Not only are the Volturi after her, but the awful things she sees!"

Alice had mentioned that while Edward was courting Bella she had kept seeing how Bella was going to die at his hands if he made the wrong decision. I was amazed that the situation had worked out at all.

"And Carlisle and Esme are her parents; I don't want to contemplate how many visions she has had of them getting busy," Tanya added with a shudder.

"Speaking of parents," I recalled what Alice had told me the previous evening, "Charlie and Sue are going to arrive soon on the first leg of their own world adventure. Alice said I would be fine but I am still considering clearing out."

"You've been around humans daily for months now," Tanya argued, "Just in passing of course. Do you think the extended exposure will be a problem?"

I shrugged.

"While we're travelling we are going to be around humans a lot; it would be better to know if there is a problem while the rest of the Cullen's are around to ensure no-one gets hurt."

"Damn logic."

"I don't think you're worried about the blood anyway," Tanya teased. She caught my hand and led me back toward the house.

"What is the problem then?"

Tanya frowned at me, "Your own insecurities," she replied matter-of-factly, "Charlie and Sue know what we are. For the first time you will be facing a human who can see past the dazzle without being a meal."

She was right, and much to my own annoyance I had not figured it out first.

"You worry that they will look at you and see a monster," Tanya continued.

"Maybe I am."

She shrugged, "Maybe you were, but you are not anymore. Monstrous behaviour defines a monster, and you have changed that."

I could not descend into the self-loathing which Edward had wrestled with for decades; my faint memories of war had taught me that humans came in all shades of grey. It made sense that some Vampires would be evil, and others would be quite moral. I was glad to be surrounded by the latter rather than the former.

"I have killed a hell of a lot more people than you," Tanya added with a worried glance at me, "So don't go all emo on me."

I smiled at her, something which was far too easy to do, "Not a chance; I hear Edward has brooded enough for the whole family."

"He had way too much practise," Tanya agreed, "Looking back, I am glad he never took me up on my offer to climb into bed though."

"And now life is repeating itself?" I guessed.

She sighed, "Could you imagine facing Bella if I had slept with Edward? She was amazingly controlled for a newborn but she would have tried to rip my head off."

Her reasoning did make sense, much to my annoyance, "And your mate would do the same to me if we indulge."

"Maybe your mate will be the one to worry about?"

Considering how long she had waited, I hoped she would find her mate first.

Esme was dusting. I watched her curiously as the small number of dust particles floated through the air. Since she dusted every day with the efficiency of a Vampire I did not understand why she was repeating the ritual just because two humans were on their way.

"It's called being 'House-Proud'," Edward explained from his seated position at the piano. Esme smiled at the two of us before continuing her efforts in the kitchen.

I wondered if Esme was nervous; did everyone expect me to try to eat the in-laws?

Edward chuckled, "No Jackson, we just enjoy when Charlie and Sue visit."

Alice had insisted that our world-tour could not begin until after the humans had visited; I suspected she just liked torturing me. At least her methods didn't involve teeth, venom and permanent scarring.

Edward's hands stilled above the piano keys and distress rapidly invaded the space around him. I repressed a sarcastic laugh at that concept that my thoughts had upset him.

I didn't want to hang around playing happy families anyway; at least he had given me a decent excuse to retreat to the forest.

Before I could leave Edward turned toward me with worry in his features, "Bella will be back soon; I can ask her to shield me."

I shrugged, "Don't bother. I am more comfortable in the forest anyway."

I left before he could reply; I heard him say my name but that was it.

I ignored the sparkle the sun ignited in my skin and stray thoughts of carving up Vampire skin to sell as diamonds were dismissed as easily.

Humans always seemed to be doing something until they had to sleep. I admired their drive even as I sat against a tree in with a view of a sliver of the driveway. I remained there for an hour listening to the sounds of the forest and contemplating what Tanya and I could get up to while Alice and Jasper were busy getting naked.

Tanya wanted to sneak into war-zones and take out psychos waging war; I wasn't sure if she was planning to drink them too. The animal blood diet was extremely bland now that the novelty had worn off.

I continued to mull over the draw of human blood and the odd pride that I was choosing my own path rather than just surviving. Was that pride enough to drive decades or even centuries of resisting the craving?

I wasn't sure of anything, except that I could not see the movie Bambi without thinking of draining something.

The slow approach of a car travelling carefully over an icy road barely disturbed my musings. Bella had picked her father and step-mother up from the airport, which proved that the invisible chord which linked her to Edward could at least stretch.

I was being unfair in my judgements, yet barely cared. I envied their bond and the feeling was closely linked to resentment.

At least Bella and Edward tried to be discreet about their sex-life. Spotting Emmett's naked backside in the forest had been traumatising the first time. The second time had just been rude.

"Come meet Charlie and Sue!" Alice trilled from the driveway. Jasper stood behind her frowning. If I tried to refuse her demand she would guilt him into trying to make me more agreeable.

I cooperated to save Jasper the trouble of having to reattach his arm and explain to Esme why her driveway needed to become a wrestling arena.

Sue spotted the three of us first; the wary recognition in her eyes gave away vital information. Charlie may have been happy to live on a 'need-to-know' basis but Sue knew exactly what we were.

Her fear made me pause. Other than the humans I had hunted and killed I had never been bothered by the fear of those around me. For some reason I was almost ashamed that I had to approach this woman with red eyes.

Alice introduced us without hesitation. Charlie glanced between Jasper and I.

"Long-lost cousins?" he speculated.

"Something like that," Jasper replied with a slight smile.

Sue met my gaze without flinching; I could see where Leah had acquired her courage.

"I can see Leah in you," I said quietly to the wary woman.

"She spoke highly of you," Sue admitted quietly, "And my daughter is not easy to impress."

"Like mother, like daughter," Charlie chuckled, "Though I hope she doesn't wait another decade to settle down."

"We never settle for less than the best," Sue replied haughtily, "It's not like she's getting any older while she's shifting."

Charlie clearly wasn't comfortable being reminded of the supernatural abilities of his step-children.

"If only she would donate some blood so I could see her future," Alice huffed. She looped her arm around Charlie's elbow and led him toward the house.

Sue waited until they were far enough for her voice to be too soft for human ears.

"Your eyes are red," she said flatly to me.

"I met my Singer," I said honestly, "He was the only human to die at my hands in the last six months."

"And before that?"

"I was a killer for seventy years."

Jasper was spreading calm over Sue, keeping the effect gentle enough to escape her notice.

"Is my husband in danger?" Sue asked, "I understand Bella had very attractive blood while she was human."

"No," I assured her, "Compared to the blood of my Singer, other humans will never compare. I have the strength to resist."

"And my control has vastly improved since Jackson arrived," Jasper added with a wisp of pride, "We keep each other in check quite well."

Sue nodded thoughtfully. Jasper moved toward the house and allowed his movements to guide Sue in the same direction. I walked on his other side to avoid crowding her.

"Leah has never been fond of the Cullen's," Sue said softly, "To hear of her admiration for you Jackson made me wonder if she had finally imprinted."

"I wish she had imprinted," I agreed, "Fate has apparently decreed that I am not yet worthy of that honour."

"She and Nahuel were quite interested in each other," Jasper added, "Even if their relationship is not destined to be permanent, they can make each other happy in the meantime."

Sue was drawn into conversation with Bella, Edward and Carlisle. I remained near Jasper, who was not moving far from Alice.

Charlie was clearly charmed by Alice, and his emotions indicated the affection of a father toward her. His eyes flicked to Jasper uneasily.

I could see his concern as though he wore a billboard above his head; Alice was so small and Jasper was clearly dangerous.

"Married over sixty years yet he looks at me like I just threatened to kill her," Jasper muttered so only the Vampires could hear him, "Every time."

"If he knew the truth, he would be scared of _her_," I hissed back.

Alice narrowed her eyes at the two of us, "Do you have something to say?" she asked suspiciously.

"Me? Nothing."

"Not a word," Jasper added.

"These Whitlock men can be very cheeky," Alice said to Charlie, "After all these years of marriage Jasper still hasn't learned."

"Learned what exactly?" Charlie asked, sounding slightly nervous.

"Never mess with a woman who has seen you naked," Alice revealed with a smile.

"I've never seen you naked," I commented, "You're beautiful and everything but Jasper is the jealous type."

The comment did not sit well with Charlie. I mentally kicked myself for making the situation worse.

Alice patted Charlie on the hand, "Charlie, did you know that our kind mate for life?"

Charlie glanced across the room at Bella.

"Edward waited a long time to find Bella and he will be devoted to her for as long as he lives. Would you like to know how long Jasper and I have been married?"

Charlie shrugged. Sue smiled at him from across the room.

"Over sixty years."

Charlie stared at Alice while he processed the information. He was not as shocked as I would have expected.

Jasper sat down on the floor in front of Alice. I understood that he was going out of his way to put the human more at ease and it was something I would not have considered so quickly.

Alice waved her hand to encourage me to sit next to him. I shrugged and then complied.

"He may not have seen me naked, but I have dragged him around by his ear before," Alice said to Charlie with another grin.

"Jasper was in the army before we met," she continued, "By the time I found him he was deeply depressed, suffering what we now call PTSD and generally disinterested in life."

"Until my angel came along," Jasper said reverently.

"I turned his life upside-down," Alice giggled.

"And I am grateful every day."

"What about you?" Charlie asked me. I could tell he was not comfortable with the adoring tone Alice and Jasper were using. He might have been on the path to accepting Jasper as suited to Alice but he did not want any more details.

"I am waiting for a woman to come into my life and start bossing me around," I confessed easily.

"Remember Jackson," Alice intoned, "It's not nagging if you would just listen the first time."

I saluted her, which only made Charlie curious.

Charlie and Sue remained for a few days before taking a trip with Bella and Edward. I wasn't sad to see them go, yet I wasn't relieved either. I was proud that I had not been tempted by their blood as much as I thought I would.

Preparations for our world tour were completed quite quickly. Though Alice had considered a private plane she had relented and agreed on a boat instead. Jasper was delighted.

Tanya and I agreed that if they got too annoying we would throw them overboard. Alice hissed at us a few seconds after that decision.

I insisted on inspecting everything Alice was packing for me just in case she tried to get revenge by making me wear something hideous or embarrassing.

The rest of the family planned to remain until after the visit from the Volturi, then relocate to Russia.

If any of us had known where Alice was going to lead us we would have refused to go.


	39. Volterra

**Jackson**

Entering the building which led to the central hub of Volturi power made me nervous and I was not remotely ashamed to admit it. The faint smell of human blood and old smoke could not hide the dangerous power which was represented.

Logically I knew we had to present ourselves to the leaders of the Vampire world but logic could go jump when I was surrounded by a potential army of enemies.

I envied Tanya; she had flat-out refused to even enter the country.

I shared a wide-eyed glance of apprehension with Jasper as Alice smiled at the receptionist.

"I'm Alice Whitlock, formerly Cullen," she announced to the human seated behind the desk, "I believe Aro will want to see me. I am accompanied by my husband and brother-in-law."

"One moment please ma'am," the female replied politely. Her hand moved to the headset she wore. She enquired if Aro had the time to see an Alice Whitlock/Cullen and two other Vampires. Her eyes widened.

"Aro is eager to see you," she said to Alice, "Right through there ma'am."

Alice held Jasper's hand in her right and reached for my hand with her left. We opened the doors, revealing a foreboding hall which echoed with the sounds of our entrance.

Alice led us forward without hesitation. Three Vampires sat on thrones at the far and of the room. The black-haired one in the middle, Aro I assumed, only had eyes for Alice.

The blonde Vampire on the right regarded us through a haze of suspicion; he had to be Caius.

The third Vampire sat directly in front of me surrounded by apathy. I pitied the Vampire known as Marcus and wondered if I could help him somehow.

"Alice," Aro crooned, "How lovely to see you. Jasper, welcome to Volterra."

Aro regarded me with the presumption that he deserved an introduction. I didn't like the way he looked at any of us.

"This is Jackson Whitlock, a blood-relative of my Jasper," Alice introduced, "He was also turned by Maria to fight in the Southern Wars. After seventy years he was released and brought to us."

"The Southern Wars," Caius hissed, "We really need to deal with that mess."  
"In good time," Aro agreed easily, without actually committing to anything. His cold eyes and frozen smile reminded me of a snake.

"We are embarking on a world tour," Jasper said blandly, "We could not pass through Europe without paying our respects."

Pride swelled within Aro and Caius. Marcus did not react.

"Carlisle sends his best wishes," Alice added.

"Yet another addition to the Cullen Coven," Caius mused, "Surely even Carlisle can see that he is gathering a potential army?"

We were on dangerous territory physically and metaphorically, yet I could not refrain from snorting in amusement. All three kings regarded me with mild surprise.

"Do you have something to add?" Aro asked in a low, threatening tone.

I smiled easily, "Carlisle has no idea that he could appear threatening," I said honestly, "We can see it, and the rest of the Vampire world can see it but he remains blind."

Caius smirked for a fraction of a second before his expression returned to the cold, calculating mask he wore. The anger faded from Aro's expression, to be replaced with curiosity. Hints of amusement were visible in his aura.

"Carlisle does not yet realize that our departure from the Cullen family is a permanent one," Alice declared.

"What?" Jasper and I yelped.

"We are the Whitlock Coven," Alice continued, "We will return to the Cullen's after our exploring but we no longer submit ourselves to Carlisle's orders. We will live nearby while the rest of the family adjusts."

"Interesting," Aro mused, "Are you the leader of the Whitlock Coven Alice?"

"Not me," Alice chirped, "Jackson will be."

"Get stuffed!" I cried, pulling my hand out of her grip, "I didn't agree to this."

Cloaked figures around the edge of the room moved forward until Aro held up a hand to still them.

"So very entertaining," Aro said without any sincerity, "Yet oddly far-fetched."

Alice let go of Jasper's hand and moved slowly toward Aro with her hand outstretched for him to read her mind. His eyes lit up with pleasure and anticipation as the distance closed between them.

I glanced over at Marcus, wondering how he existed under the cloud of depression and indifference which smothered him.

"Interesting," Aro mused after a few long moments indulging his gift, "Jackson does not realize the path that lies ahead of him."

They were both full of shit; I chose my path so it was not set in stone.

"A human mate?" Aro continued, "How do you plan to deal with that eventuality Mr Whitlock?"

I shrugged, "Carefully. Hopefully she won't be human for long; I definitely do not have the self-control Edward did."

"Not planning any Hybrid babies?" Caius clarified.

"No. It would be her decision yet I see nothing appealing about a paper cup and a syringe; that would be the only way."

Jasper smirked at me, "Pregnant without the sex; how unappealing."

"Is this why we're here?" I asked bluntly, "Can't we wait until I have a sex life to tease me about it?"

"Marcus, Jackson stumbled across some information about his mate which will interest you," Aro said. Marcus raised an eyebrow. Aro motioned with one hand for me to continue.

"I saw a vision of a human woman I knew as Ruth, who then turned into a Vampire I knew as Emily," I said softly, "She told me that she was my mate, repeatedly reborn so we could find each other."

Marcus sucked in a slow and unnecessary breath. He sat up a little straighter. Even though he still looked very depressed, I could see the faded impression of the young man he was supposed to be.

"I have not seen anything about you finding your mate's soul again in a different body," Alice said to him as she moved back to Jasper's side, "I hope that the possibility will at least bring you some comfort."

"We do mourn for the pain out brother suffers," Caius said quietly. To my surprise he was completely sincere. Aro agreed and I could clearly see that his words were quite fake.

"I am an Empath, though not as strong as Jasper without physical contact," I said to Marcus, "May I try to ease a fraction of your pain?"

Disapproval blossomed around Aro, which I found odd.

"Of course," Caius agreed, "If you are willing Marcus?"

Marcus listed his hand slowly as though aching joints limited his movements, "You may try," he rasped.

"Jasper, help," Alice encouraged as I carefully approached the apathetic Vampire.

Jasper moved to my side, "If I can?"

"Hold my elbow and pour your power into me," I suggested. I gripped his elbow in return and held my free hand out to Marcus.

The moment our skin touched the weight of his loneliness and longing for death overwhelmed me. My knees buckled momentarily and only Jasper's grip on my arm kept me on my feet.

The strength of my talent pushed against the dark tide of suffering. Jasper's power followed like a wave, attacking the cloud and dissolving the sharpest edges. The battle raged between us, utterly invisible to the rest of the room.

I broke contact when my vision began to blur. A blinding pain stabbed into the side of my head, making me groan aloud.

Alice and Jasper held me up, saving me from the embarrassment of keeling over like a drunk at a stag night. The pain receded just enough for me to function.

Marcus regarded us thoughtfully, "Thank-you," he said in a stronger voice, "The loss is still there but for the first time in centuries I feel that I can breathe."

"Metaphorically," Alice added with a smile.

The ghost of a smile graced his face, "Of course."

"Marcus, whenever we meet an unmated female Vampire I will consider sending word to the Volturi so you can meet her," Alice said, "I doubt I will actually find your reincarnated mate but I will be able to check through the visions. Should I ring through to reception if I find her?"

"I have a personal number," Marcus revealed, "One of those mobile contraptions."

He listed the number while Jasper peered into my face worriedly, "You look like shit," he said with his usual tact.

"You're not my type either," I muttered. I tried to push him away but my hand was not strong enough. A shiver of concern passed through me.

"We need to take Jackson hunting," Alice was saying to the three Vampires, "He will not suffer any permanent damage except to his pride."

"Another dedicated vegetarian?" Caius sounded bored again.

"Not exactly," Alice revealed, "Jackson doesn't really get a choice. The dying emotions of human victims literally knock him unconscious."

"Do you have anyone working on artificial blood?" I asked them, "Animals are really gross."

"We will look into that," Marcus replied. Tiny tendrils of amusement flared before the dark cloud snuffed them out.

"The Whitlock Coven is proud to offer our allegiance to the Volturi, the Cullen family and the Pack," Alice said formally.

"We will be interested to know when the split is official," Aro replied, "If you're sure you don't want to join us Alice? Your mate would of course be welcome too."

"Sadly I must decline; Jasper suffers nearly as much as Jackson when he feeds from humans and without him I would not survive. I am of better use to you out in the world; I will contact you if I see any visions which you would find relevant," Alice assured Aro.

"Thank-you for your visit," Marcus intoned formally, "The Volturi appreciates your loyalty."

Alice led the withdrawal swiftly, with a parting wave to the three Vampires. I shared a final glance with Jasper as we exited the building. Like him, I was sure than we had narrowly avoided a very ugly fate.

We ran straight to the border, happy to put as much distance between ourselves and Italy as possible. When we were far from civilisation I rounded on Alice.

"What the hell was that about?" I demanded of my 'sister-in-law', "I am not a damn coven leader!"

"You will be," she replied coldly, "Your reactions needed to be genuine and slightly panicked; Aro considers Carlisle the worst threat to his own power. Now Caius is beginning to accept what he has always suspected; that Carlisle has no interest in ruling the world."

"We made a powerful ally in Marcus," Jasper added, "But if you keep using that tone with my wife not even he will be able to find all the pieces of your body."

"You're going to follow my leadership?" I asked Alice, my voice slightly hysterical, "You don't listen to anyone!"

"One day," Alice admitted, "But until then we are all equal partners. Settle down or I will help Jasper hide your pieces."

I stepped away from her while I wrestled my emotions back under control; she really was infuriating.

"I still don't see the bloody point of that little drama!"

"You don't need to," she replied flatly, "When we split from the Cullen's officially and peacefully, Caius will be more likely to decide that Carlisle is not a threat."

"By letting three talented Vampires leave his coven, he shows he is not building an army but committing to peace," Jasper realized. Alice beamed at him.

"Where are we meeting up with Tanya?" I grumbled, "You two only lead to trouble."

"Love you too Jackson," Alice huffed sarcastically.

My mind wandered back to the last days before we had left the Cullen family.

"Alice, Aro now knows that Sue knows what we are, and that Charlie suspects," I pointed out.

Jasper obviously hadn't considered that; his head snapped toward me and his eyes were wide and worried.

"Aro knows that any move against Sue will bring the entire Pack down on them; he will not risk that. At most he will want to meet Charlie to make sure he has never, and will never betray what he knows."


	40. End of the Beginning

**Jackson**

I still enjoyed lying on a solitary rooftop staring at the stars. Rather than using the beauty of the night to imagine a life worth living I was able to reflect on how lucky I was.

In a mere six months I had gained a family, friends and a future. Even when I tried to recall how different I had been when I left the Southern Wars it was hard to believe so much has happened in such a short period of time.

Tanya was my constant companion and had saved me from slipping a few times during our travels around the world. We had obeyed Alice and kept our relationship strictly platonic. When Tanya would find an attractive human male to spend time with I would be protective of her but not jealous. If Rosalie was my sister then Tanya was my favourite cousin.

Jasper remained a constant reminder of our mutual past and as the months turned into years we began to reminisce and compare our experiences. I could see how beneficial the conversations were to him and assumed he was observing the same changes in my emotional state.

He was more than my brother; he was my comrade. At first I hinted that if he were to lead I would gladly follow him yet he would just shake his head. After the first run-in with some hostile nomads in Africa I had realized how often he let me take charge. He could anticipate my actions better than Maria ever could and we could communicate through emotions and hand signals.

Alice tried to explain that Jasper could lead if he wanted to but I was the better option because of my physical age. She also hinted that Maria had refined her technique by the time I had come along so I had been spared some of the harsher punishments her mate had suffered.

I did not want to imagine what she had done to him which had scarred his self-esteem and sense of self-worth so badly. I suspected that one day he would tell me and we would hunt her down together.

When we passed through Spain I spotted a human who looked so much like Maria I had been frozen in horror. My senses told me that her heart was beating but my mind was not listening.

Tanya and Alice had wrestled me away before I could kill the innocent woman and Tanya had held me while I drowned in guilt and shame. After the decades of training to abhor weakness I judged my own more harshly than any other.

Alice would share her knowledge of the future whenever I asked, and after a year together she began to anticipate what I would want to know.

She cut me off before I could even suggest that she should lead the Whitlock Coven in the future. She had explained with sad eyes that she would be too busy looking to the future to make split-second decisions like a leader needed to. I could see her logic and I could also see the way Jasper relied on her opinions too heavily too.

The structure had always been clear with Maria; she was the unquestioned leader and I was the second-in-command. All the Newborns answered to me and they trembled in fear if Maria turned angry eyes on them. She held me in high regards in their presence and kept her humiliations of me private.

I suspected that Jasper had not been afforded such a luxury.

After five years the Cullen's moved back to the United States from Russia. We met up with them in Moscow and returned as a group.

Alice was clearly overjoyed to be reunited with her family and even Jasper radiated enjoyment.

Tanya smiled at me, clearly knowing that I was still perplexed by the dynamic of a 'family' rather than a coven. While we had been travelling we had acted as a coven of equals. The difference was not too obvious; just enough to remind me how differently I had lived.

I preferred our disagreements to be settled through discussion rather than violence. More than once Jasper and I had reached the conclusion of a heated argument and then retreated to work out some aggression in a knock-down dirty fight. There was nothing as satisfying as throwing an opponent into a tree to really get my point across.

Edward frowned at me, clearly catching images of Jasper and I engaged in vicious combat. I had only bitten him a couple of times and he had equalled me on that score.

"I'm so proud of you," Rosalie whispered when we exchanged hugs in greeting, "No slips at all!"

I grinned back while slight wisps of envy curled around Edward. Clearly he and Rosalie had not sorted out their lingering issues.

Emmett slapped me in the back during a bone-jarring hug. He eyed the new scar on the side of my neck with interest. Jasper had earned a new one that day too.

"It is good to see you again," Carlisle said kindly as we shook hands, "I always look forward to having the whole family back together."

He was completely sincere. I could never forget my admiration for this Vampire, yet after years observing a similar brand of compassion in Alice and Tanya I had come to accept that I carried a vicious streak which Carlisle simply didn't possess.

Jasper and I had seen too much and suffered too greatly to trust in the intentions of others. Rosalie also fell into this category.

I didn't consider this outlook to be a weakness or a strength but a combination of the two. I respected his ability to negotiate the treaty with the wolves and gain the friendship of the Volturi; two feats which would have led to my death if I had been in his place. I also knew that Carlisle would not have survived a week in the Southern Wars.

"It is good to see you again Carlisle," I replied honestly.

"The freedom of travelling is lovely but there is nothing like having a home," Esme said with a smile.

I kissed her cheek and returned her hug gently. While Carlisle radiated serenity, Esme carried hope and love. I knew that they both considered themselves to be lacking a gift but I knew they were unaware Empaths spreading their own brand of optimism without effort.

Rosalie kept an arm around me and another around Emmett as we headed toward the plane. I was not looking forward to spending time in a sealed metal container filled with tasty humans. I had fed only hours before so the experience would be extremely irritating rather than dangerous.

I had spent many hours discussing Rosalie and Emmett over the years. Jasper had agreed that what others saw as stubbornness in Rosalie was a different type of gift; she was ruthless in her ability to see consequences all around her. Her blindness to the flaws of her fiancée as a human had translated into an iron-clad determination never to be fooled again. She had easily predicted how disruptive Bella's presence had been on the family and no-one had ever told her how correct she had been.

Emmett carried his impressive strength like a shield of honour. They were an extremely well-matched couple due to their loyalty and willingness to share the burdens between them. Emmett could always rely on Rosalie to be mentally strong and she could always rely on him to support her.

Like his mate I also hypothesised that Emmett had developed a quirk in direct opposition to his human life; he had been the oldest and responsible for keeping his family fed after the death of his father. From what he had disclosed it had been a grim existence. His optimistic nature and constant ability to see the good in every situation were gifts.

Jasper argued that Emmett had always been like that; even hunting for scraps and shivering during the winter. It was a discussion only Emmett himself could ever settle for us.

Alice had always been very sensitive to any criticism of her favourite brother and sister, so discourse regarding Edward and Bella had been limited. Jasper, Tanya and I had agreed that decades of being parented had left Edward with a desire to care for another and essentially be the adult in the situation. Bella had always been the one caring for her own mother, so she fell easily into the habit of letting Edward make decisions for her.

I could understand why Rosalie had been so scornful of their relationship; while Bella had remained human it had clearly not been a healthy dynamic. The entire family had been grateful when she had been turned into a Vampire according to Jasper.

Edward glanced at me worriedly from his uncomfortable airplane seat to the left.

_Are you eavesdropping?_ I asked silently.

Edward glanced away yet the guilt shone like a beacon.

_Rosalie was right and yet she was wrong; bringing Bella into the family completed it_, I assured him, _Keeping her human would have been a huge mistake. Only now that she is your equal do the two of you have a healthy relationship._

He still did not look happy.

_Quit worrying_, I commanded him sternly, _You have suffered and been rewarded for your patience. Ask your lovely mate to shield you and revel in her company. You have nothing to feel guilty for._

He quietly asked Bella to shield him and was able to relax shortly thereafter.

_Teenage angst_, Jasper scribbled onto a notepad, _He will never escape it._

Alice sat between us, which was often the case. She plucked the pen out of her mate's hand to add;

_We all carry our burdens._

The finality of her emotions worried me. I shared a glance with Jasper which conveyed our shared concern.

I was sure the years of relative peace were coming to an end.

(AN: Evening Shadows Part 2 begins soon...)


End file.
